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How do you convince your parents so you can choose your own path?
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22 / M
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Posted 4/10/13
I'd say that whether or not they think it's the right choice is irrelevant. It's more why they don't want you to pursue fashion that matters. If you want to convince them, then show them that you have talent in the field, and that you are likely succeed there. If you're unable to do that, then you probably shouldn't be pursuing it anyway. More than just wanting to do something, you need to be good at it. It's why there are so many failed actors, musicians, engineers, doctors, and really anything. They find something they want to do, but aren't very good at.

My answer might be different if the initial problem were different. You started off by saying "I really want to study fashion design, but my parents object to it." If instead, your post started off "I'm really good at fashion design, but my parents object," then my answer would probably be along the lines of "then screw 'em." Even then though, it's entirely possible that you aren't actually as good as you think you are. But regardless, wanting to do something is so incredibly common, that the statement "I want to do ____" just seems irrelevant given the amount of people that fail despite that. Your parents probably don't see any evidence that you are likely to succeed. I mean, if you had really good reason to believe that you'd succeed, why would their opinion matter? Wouldn't you be convinced that you'd do well regardless? I don't see that with your initial post.
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19 / M / United Kingdom
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Posted 4/10/13
I say start designing some stuff now and show them what you love to do, I'm sure the internet has a plethora of things to look through and learn some DIY. I'm not sure if it would help your situation, but I think parents are inclined to hear you out and listen to what you want if you show them what you want and tell them why you want to do it.

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F / Somewhere...
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Posted 4/10/13

ClassyOtaku wrote:

I say start designing some stuff now and show them what you love to do, I'm sure the internet has a plethora of things to look through and learn some DIY. I'm not sure if it would help your situation, but I think parents are inclined to hear you out and listen to what you want if you show them what you want and tell them why you want to do it.



I don't know... I once told them I want to study some sketchings and drawings when I was a kid.. At first, they told me its okay, but, once I got serious looking for a drawing course (and I actually found it) they immediately changed their mind...
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24 / M / UofL; Louisville, KY
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Posted 4/10/13
Law is boring in my opinion. I am forced by my college to take 1 law class for my Computer Science degree, patents and copyright and all that. Isn't that why companies hire lawyers? Geez. Anyway finish your current degree and get a job doing that. Then go to school part-time for fashion. If your parents are supporting your college by any type of funding such as tuition, room, books, or place to stay in their house it's not their fault you had a change of heart and like fashion now. Don't feel forced to go into law because your sister is though, some people enjoy that stuff, if you like fashion law probably is not your cup of tea. But also, fashion is a really hard field to get into.

If you currently live on your own and support yourself entirely and can afford to go back to college or change your major do it if you want. Only if you are financially secure.

Think about it this way:

Would you like to work for $30 an hour doing a job you are decently okay with / don't want to go in some days.

or

Work for $22 an hour doing a job you love and wake up excited to tackle the day?

I do have to say though, fashion is a very risky field, design something no one likes and you won't be making any money. Whereas you can use your current degree to work in a hospital for example with a secure salary.
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F / Somewhere...
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Posted 4/10/13

Khaltazar wrote:

Law is boring in my opinion. I am forced by my college to take 1 law class for my Computer Science degree, patents and copyright and all that. Isn't that why companies hire lawyers? Geez. Anyway finish your current degree and get a job doing that. Then go to school part-time for fashion. If your parents are supporting your college by any type of funding such as tuition, room, books, or place to stay in their house it's not their fault you had a change of heart and like fashion now. Don't feel forced to go into law because your sister is though, some people enjoy that stuff, if you like fashion law probably is not your cup of tea. But also, fashion is a really hard field to get into.

If you currently live on your own and support yourself entirely and can afford to go back to college or change your major do it if you want. Only if you are financially secure.

Think about it this way:

Would you like to work for $30 an hour doing a job you are decently okay with / don't want to go in some days.

or

Work for $22 an hour doing a job you love and wake up excited to tackle the day?

I do have to say though, fashion is a very risky field, design something no one likes and you won't be making any money. Whereas you can use your current degree to work in a hospital for example with a secure salary.


Yea... I'm thinking about school part time while taking a job in some company as human resource... I think it will be more convenient... I can still make my own money while doing what I love... I haven't told about it to my parent though... Thanks...
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24 / M / your mind
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Posted 4/10/13
Don't convince nothin', just start doing what you want to do and let them realize that that is how shit is gonna go down from now on!!!!
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19 / F / Oslo
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Posted 4/10/13
Do what you want as long as you don't regret it. It's your life, and you can do whatever you want with it. I mean you can even do both. I know people that pretty much live to get degrees and go to school and that's what they really love.

I'm thinking about getting two degrees as well since I really want to study Japanese even though it is essentially useless career wise :/

Do what you want just follow through with it that's all!
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17 / M / Stoke, England
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Posted 4/10/13
Look, a bunch of people who probably aren't living their dream are telling you to live your dream! That's pretty inspiring, right?
Posted 4/10/13
Don't convince them, just do it. #YOLO
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18 / M / Canada eh
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Posted 4/10/13
My dad wanted me to follow his footsteps and become a software engineer. But I didn't want to become one, so I told him. I don't want my body to go to waste by sitting around in front of the computer all day. I want a career where I'm always moving around and being physical. So I chose to become either a police or a mechanic. As of now, I'm studying to become a certified mechanic and hopefully, I'll apply for police after.

Never let anyone tell you what you should and shouldn't be, even your parents. if they keep pushing you to study for that degree that you don't want, keep refusing. They'll eventually get the idea. Worked for me.
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M / California (Nor C...
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Posted 4/10/13 , edited 4/10/13
Think your parents are trying to look out for you, and thinking you may have a better chance in life by studying law (?)

My parents stated they would not pay for my college education if I didn't choose a field that you could not make a decent living from. I didn't want to risk trying to pay or make it on my own..so I chickened out and went with a field that was on "shortage" during my time.

With the economy in the crapper and having a pretty good job, I guess I can appreciate they did that to me. My career is kind of dry, but can't complain about the money.

Its hard to change my parents opinion....set in their ways.
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23 / M / SoCal, HB
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Posted 4/10/13
maybe if you push the matter, they might budge, persistence is good. (be persuasive :D)
Specially in the field of arts like fashion, where you don't have to be "REALLY GOOD" (decent should suffice) its who you know that counts.
If you have contacts, you can probably get a job or at least somewhere in the field of fashion.

If you have some bit of luck, a few contacts, put your work out there and you're decent at fashion, it could work pretty nicely.
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23 / F / Sexual Chocolate
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Posted 4/10/13
If you're paying for your own college it's your decision, even if it's a poor one. If they're paying for it it's reasonable for them to want you to go into a field that you'll be more likely to make a decent income as doing otherwise could be seen as you wasting the money they spent to send you.

Wanting to study fashion design is about as common a dream as wanting to become an artist or musician, and if I had to hazard a guess i'd assume the unemployment rate for people who major in the subject is probably on par with those two.
Posted 4/10/13

FullMoon91 wrote:

Well, so....
I really want to study fashion design...
But, my parents kinda object to it...
So, I go to psychology major and thought to get into design after this...
Right now, I almost finished my study... So I decided to talk about it with them...
At first, they just went "okay, go ahead you have finished your study..." and so on..
I'm really excited about it...
But, few weeks later, they told me to study law major with my big sis...
Or even told me about getting a psychology specialist...
I asked them again about the design thing... The went silent for a sec... Then say, yea..you can go..
But the next day, they told me, the other things...
Right now, I really confused about what I should do....
Thanks....


You're the one who has to live with what you do as a career for the rest of your life, not your parents.
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20 / Columbia
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Posted 4/10/13

FullMoon91 wrote:

Well, so....
I really want to study fashion design...
But, my parents kinda object to it...
So, I go to psychology major and thought to get into design after this...
Right now, I almost finished my study... So I decided to talk about it with them...
At first, they just went "okay, go ahead you have finished your study..." and so on..
I'm really excited about it...
But, few weeks later, they told me to study law major with my big sis...
Or even told me about getting a psychology specialist...
I asked them again about the design thing... The went silent for a sec... Then say, yea..you can go..
But the next day, they told me, the other things...
Right now, I really confused about what I should do....
Thanks....


If that's your dream you have to follow it no matter what people think, no matter who they are, i'm very fortunate to have parents who don't disagree with how I live my life and who accept my choices. But even if your parents aren't accepting like that or just seem to not want you to go that path, you just have to ask yourself, "is this really what I want?" and not ask if it's what THEY want.

If the time ever comes, and you should really consider doing so, you have to sit them down and be straight up with them, don't beat around the bush, just talk with them about it, tell them exactly what you're thinking and what path you want to follow. Don't let them not say anything about it again, because if you can share all that with them, then they should share what they want to say and not just leave you confused like that.

I've had a lot of deep conversations with my parents where I had to say things that I just plain didn't want to talk about at all and I know it's hard to have those chats, but every time I did they always understood what I was saying and became more considerate about the subjects. It helped me out a lot.
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