Should I end it?
23979 cr points
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21 / F / Oslo
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Posted 4/18/13
Hello fellow CR members. Before you judge me, I'll just give you a little info before I ask.

So, I have a boyfriend with whom I was good friends with and he, about 2 months ago, had a bad breakup with his girlfriend at the time. Then, after some time had passed he asked me out because supposedly he had liked me for a very long time but never had the courage to ask. I didn't actually like him in that way, but I thought that since he had been so depressed that maybe I could, you know, make him feel happy again. So I said yeah sure why not.

Well, I'm graduating soon and about to leave him in about 7 weeks. (meaning we already discussed breaking up at that point) but I'm starting to wonder if I should just end it now so that, selfishly, I'll be able to actually really enjoy my last weeks as a senior. (He can be extremely clingy which makes my friends uncomfortable, and as such, won't talk to me as much when he's around... which is most of the time)

I also would like to have that possibility of asking someone out to senior ball so that I could have that experience of bringing someone I really wanted to be more than just friends with.

I don't know... I feel so bad because I really want him to be happy and I care about him a lot, just not in the same way he does, but I really want that extra happiness for myself as well..

Should I just wait it out or end it soon?
Posted 4/18/13
Stopped reading at clingy. Dump him and move along. Seriously.
Posted 4/18/13 , edited 4/18/13

mesomuffin wrote:

Hello fellow CR members. Before you judge me, I'll just give you a little info before I ask.

So, I have a boyfriend with whom I was good friends with and he, about 2 months ago, had a bad breakup with his girlfriend at the time. Then, after some time had passed he asked me out because supposedly he had liked me for a very long time but never had the courage to ask. I didn't actually like him in that way, but I thought that since he had been so depressed that maybe I could, you know, make him feel happy again. So I said yeah sure why not.

Well, I'm graduating soon and about to leave him in about 7 weeks. (meaning we already discussed breaking up at that point) but I'm starting to wonder if I should just end it now so that, selfishly, I'll be able to actually really enjoy my last weeks as a senior. (He can be extremely clingy which makes my friends uncomfortable, and as such, won't talk to me as much when he's around... which is most of the time)

I also would like to have that possibility of asking someone out to senior ball so that I could have that experience of bringing someone I really wanted to be more than just friends with.

I don't know... I feel so bad because I really want him to be happy and I care about him a lot, just not in the same way he does, but I really want that extra happiness for myself as well..

Should I just wait it out or end it soon?


The sucky thing about relationships is someone always gets hurt. But in relationships I don't think there is ever a 'right' or 'wrong' thing to do (unless you cheat or something lol) because in the end you are with someone if you're happy with them. Do what makes you happy and try to be his friend after if you still want the friendship.
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M / Fort Bragg, NC
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Posted 4/18/13
Are there any lingering emotions left between you two?

It's very sweet that you want him to be happy and that you care, but if you don't feel the same way,
- It's not fair to him.
- It's not fair to you.

He should have to understand your feelings about this. It's your choice and your happiness.
I'm not saying that you should be mean and break up in a harsh way.

but, it is time for you to move on with your life, and he on with his.

It's not really selfish. If you don't share the same feelings with him that he does with you, there's nothing selfish about the relationship.
There's just unhappiness and excessive leading him on.

I recommend that you move on. ^^ It seems like the best choice for you.
1mirg 
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24 / M / United States of...
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Posted 4/18/13
...why is this not posted in the help/advise area?

4635 cr points
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F
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Posted 4/18/13
I say end it. It's your life, and if you aren't comfortable with him in it as of right now, I say, screw it. You can end it lightly and carefully, and maybe he won't be as distressed after it. You can't go on faking it for 7 weeks. That's lame. Be happy and relieved from that.
22362 cr points
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29 / M / United States
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Posted 4/18/13
End it, nothing good will come from prolonging the inevitable.

Also it's not really selfish because it's a relationship, if you're not happy with it you don't need to stay in it. Staying in it isn't helping you or him, and the sooner he learns you don't think of him in that way the sooner he can move on.
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F / Urban South
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Posted 4/18/13
Too long, didn't read. End it, whatever it was.
Sailor Candy Moderator
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Posted 4/18/13

mesomuffin wrote:

Hello fellow CR members. Before you judge me, I'll just give you a little info before I ask.

So, I have a boyfriend with whom I was good friends with and he, about 2 months ago, had a bad breakup with his girlfriend at the time. Then, after some time had passed he asked me out because supposedly he had liked me for a very long time but never had the courage to ask. I didn't actually like him in that way, but I thought that since he had been so depressed that maybe I could, you know, make him feel happy again. So I said yeah sure why not.

Well, I'm graduating soon and about to leave him in about 7 weeks. (meaning we already discussed breaking up at that point) but I'm starting to wonder if I should just end it now so that, selfishly, I'll be able to actually really enjoy my last weeks as a senior. (He can be extremely clingy which makes my friends uncomfortable, and as such, won't talk to me as much when he's around... which is most of the time)

I also would like to have that possibility of asking someone out to senior ball so that I could have that experience of bringing someone I really wanted to be more than just friends with.

I don't know... I feel so bad because I really want him to be happy and I care about him a lot, just not in the same way he does, but I really want that extra happiness for myself as well..

Should I just wait it out or end it soon?


I'm sorry but this thread is a personal question. The rule about personal threads is just to keep there from being a bazillion threads with just a few entries to meet the needs of one individual. Please ask all your questions here in the help/ advice thread: http://www.crunchyroll.com/forumtopic-1099/the-general-helpadvice-thread

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