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Relationship misconceptions
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24 / M / United States
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Posted 4/26/13 , edited 4/26/13
I decided to create a thread here for those who ran into misunderstandings in the past with their family, friends and partners, that wish to talk about their past experiences.

I've experienced quite a few myself and I know it can really help to come out and speak about them.

I'll post some of my own experiences as well.
Posted 4/26/13
Sex = intimacy

No, not exactly. If anything, sex consumes all the energy to supply intimacy.
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Posted 4/26/13
Long distance relationships don't work. Don't keep lying to yourself about them.
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19 / M / Canada eh
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Posted 4/26/13

JonPWills wrote:

Long distance relationships don't work. Don't keep lying to yourself about them.


My best friend has a long distance relationship and its working perfectly fine with him. I'm really good friends with his girlfriend and when I see them together, I can't help but smile. Their relationship is so pure and innocent, it's ridiculous.

They don't live that far apart, like 4 hours away, but it's still a long distance relationship nonetheless. My best friend is really dedicated to this relationship, not something you don't see a lot nowadays, and he goes and visits her almost every weekend.

The trick to make a long distance relationship work is: dedication, love, communication, trust and commitment. If you don't have any of those, then sorry, you shouldn't be in a relationship to begin with.
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42 / M / Westchester Count...
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Posted 4/26/13
One of the most important things in a relationship to do but is also one of the hardest to do is tell the person your with is the things you don't think they want to hear. Even if its a small gripe, an annoyance or something you think may be trivial its better to get it out in the open instead of letting it fester. Over time they build up and can cause a rift that you may not be able to overcome. Its better to get it out in the open so you can move past it. My ex wife and I where married for ten years and never really argued, we both where afraid of hurting each other but after all that time everything built up and came to a head and eventually led to us divorcing. So if you think holding something back as to not hurt the one you are with its better just to talk about and move on.
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24 / M / United States
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Posted 4/26/13 , edited 4/26/13

JonPWills wrote:

Long distance relationships don't work. Don't keep lying to yourself about them.


this isn't exactly true, I knew a couple who was in a long distance relationship for 5 years, they're married now and together now after all that time.
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24 / M / United States
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Posted 4/26/13
what I generally meant was along the lines of for example, with my former partner when it came down to one of us wanting to spend time with the other we would ask if the other would drop what they were doing to come spend together. However for some reason she believed I was controlling her for asking her not to go and play with her friends, during a period I was very ill.

This was asked of me often and when it was I stopped what I was doing for her. I never once told her she was controlling, I liked the fact she would call me away from things to be with her or tell me not to do something because she would rather spend time with me.

More or less some form of misunderstanding like this. To this day I still do not know why she came to that conclusion.
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28 / M / Michigan, Metro D...
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Posted 4/27/13
I try to avoid misunderstandings as much as possible. I am pretty clear on who I like, when, where, why, and whether or not I think it will work. My problem tends to be twofold. Either I try to explain things, but they don't quite understand so I wind up over-explaining/analyzing everything or my judgement of timing is incredibly bad.

The simplest misunderstanding being.. "I think she likes me too, I should let her know. Oh, she doesn't, and now i've botched everything."
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Posted 4/27/13
I think if you're (both partners) truthful, open, trusting, & transparent to your significant other, that'll go a long way to avoiding any misunderstandings.
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Posted 4/27/13 , edited 4/27/13
I avoid misconceptions by being forever alone. [
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24 / M / United States
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Posted 4/27/13 , edited 4/27/13

PhyongHwa wrote:

I think if you're (both partners) truthful, open, trusting, & transparent to your significant other, that'll go a long way to avoiding any misunderstandings.


I agree with this 100% you have to be open truthful and trusting if you're not it won't work period. It can't just be one either both partners have to be that way or it eventually creates mistrust with the other which leads to even more problems eventually.
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99 / F / Neverwhere
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Posted 4/27/13
You can never own a person. (Unless you live in a place where slavery is still legalized)
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24 / M / United States
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Posted 4/27/13

demongurrl13 wrote:

You can never own a person. (Unless you live in a place where slavery is still legalized)


This is true
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30 / Bite the pillow.
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Posted 4/27/13

demongurrl13 wrote:

You can never own a person. (Unless you live in a place where slavery is still legalized)


This. People aren't objects.
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27 / M
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Posted 4/27/13

demongurrl13 wrote:

You can never own a person. (Unless you live in a place where slavery is still legalized)




You know those Hmong folks society they see that a little different. In fact these days many society these do. I heard the men in South Korea don't exactly treat women too kindly neither.
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