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Post Reply ✎ RANDOM RP ♡
Posted 7/5/13
Iva tried hard to suppress her laughter, but failed eventually and erupted into a fit of laughter that went on for five minutes straight. Manu was like a young version of herself, and Darelle reminded her of a virgin brownie. "You know, talking about sex and thinking about sex doesn't change the fact that you're probably a virgin or something, douche bag. In fact, I believe you touch yourself at night while you stare at pictures of baby raccoons and you only wish you can get Manu's tits. How big is your dick anyway? 1 inch? My wiener dog is bigger than you, cock sucking monkey." Iva was on a roll, shortly leaning down to Manu's height and giving her a victory thumbs up.
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Posted 8/9/13
Darrelle just stood there shaking his head. "After being gone MENTALLY for a month and two weeks, this is all you two girls were able to come up with? Y'all might need some saving here after hearing all that was said. AW LAWD HELP THEM OUT PLEE! PLEE JEEZUS SAY THE BAYBEHS! SAYYYYYY THE BAYBEHS!!!" He quickly got down on both knees crying waterfalls behind his dark shades hoping that both Iva and Manu could see the light in becoming better at talking shiet. But then....

"Oh hell who am I kitten? I need to be saved instead! Y'all dunn killed me for a month and two weeks time with lame put downs. AND I'M TALM BOUT LAME! L-A-M-E! DAT LAAAAAAAHHH-MEEEEEEEEEEEH!!! But it's all good though, I could work this out. My 1 inch dick? It sho ain't 1 inch, but I'll play along.....it's good enough for Manu's mosquito tits, so yeah, that's coo. That's coo. That's coo. As for you Iva? HEH! Shiet, my dick refuses to even get hard, it just yawns and goes back to sleep cuz there ain't nothin to see here. YOOOUUU AIIIINNNN'TT NUUUUUUTTTHAAAAANG!
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Posted 8/16/13
Manu crossed her arms over her mosquito bites and huffed. "I'D LIKE TO SEE YOU DO BETTER WITHOUT US FOR A MONTH. YOU'D SHRIVEL UP AND DIE IN A PILE OF YOUR OWN TEARS, FACE IT." She made a disgusted face when Darrelle said his 1-inch-dick (she refused to believe it was any larger) was good enough for Manu. "YOU REALLY ARE A PEDOPHILE AREN'T YOU...?" She stepped behind Iva and looked on from behind her. "SOUNDS MORE LIKE YOU JUST CAN'T GET IT UP. IVA'S FUCKING BEAUTIFUL. YOU JUST DON'T WANNA FUCK HER BRAINS OUT BECAUSE YOU'RE GAY, THAT'S IT, RIGHT? YOU'RE GAY!"

Feeling safe again because he was obviously gay, Manu stepped out again from behind Iva. "POOR THING," she said, shaking her head sadly for the Darrelle.
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Posted 8/16/13
"Darrelle, speaking to you requires effort and giving a shit, which I don't have left anymore." Iva retorted, looking at him like a dead fish who didn't give a faaah. "And while I'm currently not giving a shit, you clearly ARE a pedophile," Iva agreed with Manu, smirking at her cunningly and then frowning once again back at Darrelle. "You go for little girls because women don't want your ass." She nodded her head, "You wouldn't know a real woman if she BIT YOU IN THE ASS CRACK...BUT SORRY THAT WOULD NEVER HAPPEN BECAUSE YOU'RE GAY AND LESBIAN FOR LAMPS." Iva went along with the gay thing, kind of surprised that Manu used the word so wisely.

She knelt down and whispered for only Manu to hear, "Hey, Manu... do you know what being gay means?"


(I AWAIT HER EXPLICIT REPLY LOL)
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Posted 8/16/13
Darelle just stood there with a blank look on his face and then sighed. And then quickly followed that up with a little chuckle. "Aahhh MAN! How did they hit me with that GAY SHIT CHHEEESEE?" He decided to pace back and forth shaking his head before walking up to them and doing slow laps as he started speaking once more.

"Y'all realize that if I WEEEERE gay, I wouldn't hit on you? Like real talk *smacking the back of his right hand onto his left palm* REAL TALK THO, if I were gay I'd hit on the closest guy that would walk by or just fuck the shit outta dat nigguh and quickly leave before he knew what had happened. Like man, I took him to the shade, HOW DID HE NOT SEE ME!? And before I leave he would have gotten hit with the wetness. WHAT RYHMES WITH CASH?? SP-SP-SPLLLLLL-AAAAAAAAAA-AAASSSHHHHHHHH"

After all of that talking, Darelle fell to the ground laughing so hard you just stopped hearing him laugh. His mouth was wide open, shoulders shaking like Sagat, but no sound. He would finally stop, get up and say one last thing. "Aye! Juss be GLAD you got a guy talking to you two. Cuz right now people would look at you and think to themselves 'OH, WHAT'S THAT!? WHAT. IS. THAT?' Thinkin that y'all just escaped from the circus. DA AMAZING DUO OF NAKED BITCH AND FLAT TITS!"
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Posted 8/25/13 , edited 8/25/13
Manu tilted her head and nodded at Iva, and whispered back, "YEAH IT MEANS WHEN A GUY CAN'T GET IT UP WITH A GIRL AND INSTEAD FUCKS ANOTHER GUY." She nodded sagely.

Manu turned on Darrelle. "MAYBE YOU'RE HITTING ON US BECAUSE YOU'RE OVER-COM-PEN-SAY-TING." She turned to Iva and asked, "AM I USING THAT WORD RIGHT?" She'd only heard it used once, when her mom made fun of her uncle for buying a really big car. "JUST BECAUSE YOU'RE GAY DOESN'T MEAN YOU'LL GO FUCKING ALL THE RANDOM GUYS YOU SEE ON THE STREETS, THAT' INDECENT. YOU DO IT IN PRIVATE. THAT'S RAPE THE WAY YOU SAID IT. RAPIST." She now firmly believed that Darrelle was a rapist. There was no other explanation. She thought about how far away the next human beings were in case she needed to scream.

She glared at him. "I'M STILL GROWING. I'M GONNA BE SMOKING HOT AND FUCKING BEAUTIFUL MEN WHO LOVE ME WITH ROCK HARD ABS AND ROCK HARD DICKS BEFORE YOU CAN EVEN UNZIP YOUR PANTS AND GET YOUR TINY DICK UP." She pointed at Iva, and added, "AND SHE CAN SO GET OTHER GUYS TO TALK TO HER. BETTER, LESS GAY AND NOT RAPIST GUYS." To prove her point, she called at a passing guy, and said, "HEY. WOULD TO TALK TO THIS LADY RIGHT HERE IF YOU SAW HER ON THE STREETS?"

With one look, the passerby started drooling. "I'LL TAKE THAT AS A YES." She turned to Darrelle again. "SEE?"
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Posted 8/28/13
"GUUUURL! Yo sho yeen in denial? You sayin I'm compensating?? HAAAAAAH! KILL YOSELF! MATTER OF FACT! Cry me a river first and let that carry you down this street as you drown yoself before getting hit by a car. Ain't nobody got time fo dat! SHUP NIGGA SHUP NIGGA SHUP NIGGA!"

The sass was on now. Darelle didn't care that he told an 11 year old girl to kill herself. HOW HORRIBLE OF HIM TO SAY SUCH A THING! But to that ladies and gentleman, Darelle was onto something. He quickly went from being stupid to a masochist to retarded to gay to full on rapist. What a turn of events.

"Maaaaaan its like what they say is true isn't it? My nigga Dave Chappelle was right! WIMMIN don't give a damn at awl! NONE WHAT SO EVAH!! Shit, it went from minor harassment or jokes I'd like to call it, FROM ME, to having my dignity KANO'ED. DAT'S DAT REACH FOR THE NIGGA'S HEART AND PULL THAT SHIT OUT. BUT YEEN DONE YET, NAH SEE. YOU GOTTA GON HEAD CRUSH IT IN YOU PALM LIKE SOME BITCH THAT YOU IS!"

He stood there shaking his head thinking if there was really anymore to say at this point. Her being brain damaged clearly didn't work in his favor. All he'd probably from get from a response is the dumb nigga answer instead. '.....so!?' With that being said, Darelle decided to wait things out because he seems to be dealing with a headcase. Like that retarded kid he met on Playstation Home who acted EXACTLY the same. Buuuut.... of course he had more to say...so let's continue!

"Shit maaan. This BETTAH not be like that bitch ass nigga from PSHome all over again. Dude was THE biggest retard in all of humanity. I just hope to my nigga G up there dat it ain't true. AYYYEE NIG! GERALD MCGLOCKTON!!! PLEE TELL ME THIS MAHBUU HOO AIN'T THE TWIN SISTAH! Cuz if she issssss....boy she finna catch dat fade to her face!"
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Posted 8/28/13
"MOMMA DOESN'T BELIEVE IN VIDEO GAMES SO I'VE NEVER PLAYED THEM, AND I'M AN ONLY CHILD." Manu responded, ignoring the rest.

[[ short reply is short, sorry DX LET'S WAIT FOR KOKOCHII TO RESPOND 8D ]]
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Posted 8/28/13
(yA'LL A FUNNY BUNCH AHAHAHA AN 11 YEAR OLD AND A GANGSTER AT EACHOTHER THROAT)

Iva, at this point, has had enough. Darelle talked so much that anytime now she will go through menopause, and maybe, extinction. She wasn't a dinosaur, but she wished at this point she was so she could walk over Darelle and eat him. "You want to see a magic trick?" Iva asked, a fake looking smile on her face. "I'll make your dick disappear." she muttered almost mutely, her eyes turning red and her head growing horns as she extended her arm in front of her, a pitch fork now in her grasp. She aimed it at Darell's southern region, seething. "If you don't leave us alone right this instant, I'm going to cut off your wiener." She promised.
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Posted 8/28/13
[sad smdh. might as well not even reply y'know. like damn waste of a post from me now that you hit me with, LIKE I SAID, that dumb nigga reply. hitting me with that ....so!? but it's whatever though. I shouldn't trip over this, but now it do make me cautious of how much I reply now.]

"Really? Bitch, really?" said Darelle in a IDGAF voice. He was slightly annoyed that he was pretty much shrugged off by a tiny girl. She failed to completely understand what he said. With that being said, Darelle would do the same and go back to the original person he was hating on from the get go. "Aye, if you wanna cut off my dick go right ahead. Whatchu gon do? Throw it in the tall grass?? If you do and I find that shit, you sho know I'm bout to just straight dick slap yo face from now on right? Shit is PORTABLE NOW MOUFUGGA! Carry it in my hand, no need to UNZIP AND WHIP! Hell fuck, if I go to surgery and get a bigger dick to replace my old one, niggga NOW you done fucked up guh. DAT'S TWO DICKS!!! You like candy? CUZ I GOT THAT MIKE AND IKE'S FOR YAH! POW POW!!!"
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Posted 8/28/13
[[ OMG DEFY WHERE DO YOU GET ALL THIS FROM XDDDDD THAT WAS HILARIOUS... OMG... AHAHAHAAAA!!! ]]


Manu stood in the background making fist pumps in the air while Iva spoke. When Darrelle started talking again, she for some reason couldn't help giggling a bit, and admitted that even if he was stupid, and a rapist, and gay, he was pretty funny and had a way with words. MAYBE WE SHOULD KEEP HIM AROUND...

WHEN SUDDENLY. Just kidding. Nothing happened.
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Posted 8/30/13
[where do I get this things from? sayings from friends or when it's me and my bro just talking shit about people to amuse us. other times, or well mostly it's from comedians that I used to watch. sometimes I bring up things I say on playstation home or what some people said that I laughed at. but generally speaking....I combine these things with just my oddball sense of humor. should I break it down on what's what?]
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Posted 9/1/13 , edited 9/1/13
(DEFY YOU ARE SOOOO CREATIVE LMFAOOO SRSLY)

Iva growled like the apex predator, Randy Orton. "NO, I'LL GRAB YOUR PORTABLE DICK BEFORE IT RUNS OFF," while Darelle was still talking, she commenced to cut off his wiener, which was now censored on the floor. (WHAT AM I DOING ANYMORE hahahahahahaha) She then dropped to the floor and slithered like Randy Orton, edging closer to the dick that flopped looking like a fish out of water. "FLOP FLOP BITCH"

.......

..............

Iva blinked, realizing what was supposed to be Darelle's part was actually just a grilled hotdog. "Huh?" She looked at her hand, which she thought was holding a pitchfork, but in fact was but a puny stick.

"FUCK ME AND MY FREQUENT HALLUCINATIONS I SHOULD HAVE FUCKING TAKEN MY MEDICATION LIKE MOM TOLD ME TOO, FUCK!" At this point, there was no going back.

"But moooooooooom, I'm not a weirdo WHY DON'T YOU BELIEVE ME IT'S COMPLETELY NORMAL TO COLLECT PET STICKS. THEY'RE SO INTERESTING. ONE IS BIGGER, ONE IS SMALLER, THE OTHER IS MEDIUM SIZED, AND THE OTHERS ARE HARDER THAN THE REST, SOME SKINNY, SOME THICK, SOME PRICKLY."

End flashback


"I know what I have to do," Iva looked up, determined, tears in her eyes from the vision she just had. She grabbed the grilled hotdog (which was actually just another stick, she didn't know) and shoved it in her mouth, chewing.


(PLOT TWIST)
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Posted 9/2/13
(HAHAHA YES. YES I AM)

"....dafuq? What in the hell is she doin??" Darelle was speechles. He had no idea such a crazy ass girl like Iva had ever existed. Without even thinking at all, Darelle walked up to Iva and just slapped her across the face like a fly landed on her cheek despite the fact that she was in the middle of chewing.

"HEY! Stop that! Why'd you hold onto that stick all firm and shiet niiga!? HELL! Why you start chewing on it!? YOU LIKE WOOD? You should upgrade mayne. Who carries around sticks, matter of fact who LIKES sticks? AIN'T NOBODY GOT TYME FO DAT! See whatchu need is logs. They big, LONG, and hefty. Plus if they got too much foreskin you awlready know you can just peel back the bark HAAAAAH!"

(WONDERING WHERE THIS PLOT TWIST WILL HEAD TOO LOL)
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Posted 9/3/13 , edited 9/3/13
Iva was slapped across the face like an annoying fly, she hated flies. Annoying botched just flying around with their bzzzz noise and tryna box. "NIGGA YOU JUST SLAP ME?" Iva was partially outraged. Partially because she was kind of glad Darrell pulled her out of her crazy zone. At least for now. She stopped chewing her stick, she didn't want to get wood cavities. (Hahahah ababa) and slapped darelle across the face with a slobbery bitten stick. "KARMA BITCH," she hissed, simply rolling her eyes when he tried to talk about sticks and logs and shit. "WHAT DO YOU KNOW ABOUT STICKS BITCH? BESIDE THE FACT YOU STICK THEM UP YOUR ASS AT NIGHT!"

(CAPS LOCK BECAUSE SHE'S ACTUaLLY SCREAMING)
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