First  Prev  1  2  3  Next  Last
Who's ever been in a street gang?
Posted 5/6/13
I had a gang of cats... Does that count? There was about 20 of them furry lil things.
9546 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / F
Offline
Posted 5/6/13
My sister was once in a gang but not by her choice. She was only in 9th grade and we lived in a really bad part of the neighborhood because we were dirt poor. She told them that she wouldn't be in their gang, but apparently almost all the kids in the school were forced to do some sort of dirty work for them. In order for them to get her, they told her they would kill her best friend who had a little baby at the time. She, of course, didn't believe them and within the next month they had found her best friend hanging by a tree with a bunch of gang symbols carved into her body. The autopsy said she was brutally raped, stabbed, and then hung. They never found the babies body though. They had threatened they would kill her family next if she didn't comply, so she did.

However, that made things worse for her because many of the girls in the gang were jealous that the leader really liked her. He actually ended up making her his girlfriend and got her pregnant which shocked my mom because she didn't even know anything was even going on since the gang swore her to secrecy. After the baby was born, all the girls started beating my sister up and she ended up in the hospital about five times within one year. Eventually, my mom caught my sister lying and forced her to confess everything about the girls that beat her up, the money and jewellery missing from the house to pay off "the rent" to the gang for being in their territory, and the threats they made to everyone. My mom, completely shocked, dropped everything and we moved all the way to the opposite side of the US. We lived in a small car for a while till my mom was able to get a good job and rent an apartment. My sister still has psychological trauma from what has happened to her and she has always told me that she doesn't feel clean even in her 30's.

Bottom line, I hate gangs.
2673 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / F / Sexual Chocolate
Offline
Posted 5/6/13

justanotherguy_2005 wrote:

Yes but no member of a gang remains ignorant of what is really going on with them. Even if a person isn't the one stealing from people or killing rival gang members they are just as bad by associating with them and being a part of what they do. I would rather just live a more honest life in poverty or even die an honest death early on instead of trying to better myself and my family while causing nothing but misery to everyone else.


Out of curiosity what is the poorest you've ever been? What was your family situation growing up? How many nights did you grow up not knowing if you'd have anything to eat the next day? It's really easy to claim "I would never do X" when you've never lived that kind of life.

And like Seissha said, sometimes the choice is made for you.
Posted 5/6/13 , edited 5/6/13

Pomff wrote:
It's really easy to claim "I would never do X" when you've never lived that kind of life.

And like Seissha said, sometimes the choice is made for you.


Agreed.
Posted 5/6/13

Pomff wrote:


justanotherguy_2005 wrote:

Yes but no member of a gang remains ignorant of what is really going on with them. Even if a person isn't the one stealing from people or killing rival gang members they are just as bad by associating with them and being a part of what they do. I would rather just live a more honest life in poverty or even die an honest death early on instead of trying to better myself and my family while causing nothing but misery to everyone else.


Out of curiosity what is the poorest you've ever been? What was your family situation growing up? How many nights did you grow up not knowing if you'd have anything to eat the next day? It's really easy to claim "I would never do X" when you've never lived that kind of life.

And like Seissha said, sometimes the choice is made for you.


Thankfully we have never had issues with whether there would be food or not. We all live paycheck to paycheck and almost always have to pool everyones money together to make it through. We have definitely never had it really easy though. So yes, I did not live the kind of life that is typical of that kind of thing. But I still know myself well enough to know I would never have joined a gang. Even when I had resorted to stealing from various places I made sure it was done in a way that wouldn't affect people. Even in the incident Seissha mentioned I would have acted differently. It might not have turned out well for anyone still but there were other options. I did have a different experience growing up though which is probably why I would have just told everyone everything that was going on regardless of the consequences.
31014 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / M
Offline
Posted 5/6/13

justanotherguy_2005 wrote:


Pomff wrote:


justanotherguy_2005 wrote:

There is always a choice.


Of course there's always a choice, for instance you could choose to die of dehydration if you wanted to do. Just because you have a choice doesn't mean there's a clearly better option.

Most people don't grow up thinking, "Man I saw The Wire once and I really wanna be in a street gang!" For a lot of people they're stuck in the same poverty the past 2+ generations of their family have been stuck in, their parents are either away or working ungodly hours just to make ends meet, and they've seemingly got no way out. So when that 12 year old kid who doesn't know there is anything but being poor sees a gangster rolling in a new car with diamond earrings they see a way out and you better believe that if they think that that's their only option they're going to take it.


Yes but no member of a gang remains ignorant of what is really going on with them. Even if a person isn't the one stealing from people or killing rival gang members they are just as bad by associating with them and being a part of what they do. I would rather just live a more honest life in poverty or even die an honest death early on instead of trying to better myself and my family while causing nothing but misery to everyone else.


A great ideal you've got. However, I bet you've never been at the bottom of the hole? Hell, worst you've ever had was your parents grounded you. You've got no place to judge others (however wrong they may be for their life and choices) while you lived comfortably, never knowing what they went through. You have the privilege to sit back and say "I would rather..." or " If it were me..". Not everyone is you. Others want to get ahead through any, and all means possible.

TLDR: Get off your high horse.
2673 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / F / Sexual Chocolate
Offline
Posted 5/6/13

justanotherguy_2005 wrote:

Thankfully we have never had issues with whether there would be food or not. We all live paycheck to paycheck and almost always have to pool everyones money together to make it through. We have definitely never had it really easy though. So yes, I did not live the kind of life that is typical of that kind of thing. But I still know myself well enough to know I would never have joined a gang. Even when I had resorted to stealing from various places I made sure it was done in a way that wouldn't affect people. Even in the incident Seissha mentioned I would have acted differently. It might not have turned out well for anyone still but there were other options. I did have a different experience growing up though which is probably why I would have just told everyone everything that was going on regardless of the consequences.


Like you said, you don't know what that situation is like.

Now maybe i'm misreading your posts, but if you were implying that people should just give up and die or resign themselves to a life of poverty because "they can choose to do that" or it's what you would do your claim doesn't really hold weight. If you weren't implying that no blood, no foul. Just recalling how previous conversations i've had on like this subject have gone though that's what it seemed like.
9546 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / F
Offline
Posted 5/6/13 , edited 5/6/13

justanotherguy_2005 wrote:


Pomff wrote:


justanotherguy_2005 wrote:

Yes but no member of a gang remains ignorant of what is really going on with them. Even if a person isn't the one stealing from people or killing rival gang members they are just as bad by associating with them and being a part of what they do. I would rather just live a more honest life in poverty or even die an honest death early on instead of trying to better myself and my family while causing nothing but misery to everyone else.


Out of curiosity what is the poorest you've ever been? What was your family situation growing up? How many nights did you grow up not knowing if you'd have anything to eat the next day? It's really easy to claim "I would never do X" when you've never lived that kind of life.

And like Seissha said, sometimes the choice is made for you.


Thankfully we have never had issues with whether there would be food or not. We all live paycheck to paycheck and almost always have to pool everyones money together to make it through. We have definitely never had it really easy though. So yes, I did not live the kind of life that is typical of that kind of thing. But I still know myself well enough to know I would never have joined a gang. Even when I had resorted to stealing from various places I made sure it was done in a way that wouldn't affect people. Even in the incident Seissha mentioned I would have acted differently. It might not have turned out well for anyone still but there were other options. I did have a different experience growing up though which is probably why I would have just told everyone everything that was going on regardless of the consequences.


It's funny when people say they would act differently, when the options were: join the gang and don't have the family killed or tell mom who would go to the police WHO were just as corrupted and tip off the gang and then kill the entire family including her because my sister didn't even know the police were in on it until she was one of the members and when she was the GF of the head gang member. It is not as easy as you make it out to be. Where we lived is one of the poorest most gang-infested areas of the US. There were 100's of miles of desert in every direction which made moving an incredibly rough feat. My mom had to pawn off everything in her house at the dead of the night and leave secretly so nothing would tip off the gang. It was like escaping prison. I don't remember any of this because I was a baby, but I had never seen so much fear in my mom and sister's eyes when they finally told me what had happened.

So in your case, your entire family would have been brutally murdered given your option of choice. Some people choose to take the burden upon themselves rather than live with the guilt that they are the reason why their family was killed. Maybe they would do a merciful thing and kill you too along with your family if they were nice enough.

3525 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
32 / M / "Spaaaaace!"
Offline
Posted 5/6/13 , edited 5/6/13

Pomff wrote:
Out of curiosity what is the poorest you've ever been? What was your family situation growing up? How many nights did you grow up not knowing if you'd have anything to eat the next day? It's really easy to claim "I would never do X" when you've never lived that kind of life.

And like Seissha said, sometimes the choice is made for you.


You choose the way you live your life. I come from a family of two militantly religious alcoholic parents. I was living at camilus house at the age of 18 in downtown Miami. Slept in the homes of friends and strangers, slept in a boat I was working on at a marina. lived in a tent for 6 months while I couldn't find work. I know very well what it's like to live on canned beans, saltine crackers, peanut butter and ketchup packets. when I was 21 I was lucky enough to purchase a Volvo from the mechanic shop I was working at. I lived in a back room at the mechanics for 4 months and 8 months in my Volvo before I could finally afford an apartment.

I'm not telling you this to evoke pity, I'm just letting you know what sort of life I've lived. I've never stole anything in my life. Never sold drugs. Never committed a crime. I don't touch alcohol. I had plenty of opportunities to do all or any of these and plenty of reasons.

Don't try and evoke sympathy from me for people who are too weak to make it on their own. The choice is never made for you. You always have a choice.


Sorry pomff, this post just hit a nerve.
Posted 5/6/13



Don't pretend to know what my life involved. My life might not have been the hardest thing to go through in the world but don't think it didn't have its own challenges. Take your own advice.




I am not saying everyone should choose that but I am just saying that for me, personally, where I am at now in my life I would rather just let whatever happens happen instead of going down that road and making things worse for everyone else. The way I see it is my life is not more important than any of the victims that would be created while I was doing whatever it ended up being in a gang. I'm not saying my choice would even be the best option either.




I never said my choice would have made everything all better. I just said that it is what I would have done no matter what the consequences were. I would have tried to see what the best choice is but obviously the real consequences aren't going to be visible until you make the choice. So yes, my family very well might have been murdered in that situation. It just would not be in me to join them even more so after any sort of threat was made. I would just be even more against it at that point.
48169 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
M / Cresskill
Offline
Posted 5/6/13
Believe it or not, most of these gangs started as a social group for blacks due to the racial problems in LA , however things got worse and eventually a war broke out in which even the National Guard was involved because at the time LAPD didnt have enough manpower. I dont know how it is in other countries but here in the us its mostly Crips, Bloodz, MS-13 and Latin Kings, sure there are others but those are the most influential and well known gangs.

I was never part of a gang since I was born in a pretty good neighborhood and the only gang action I ever encountered was , on GTA, TV, and the typical High School wannabees
5817 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / M / Australia
Offline
Posted 5/6/13 , edited 5/6/13
Yes, I was in one, where we rode around on motorcycles, and then I decided to become a teacher.... but you know, always had problems with the students and other staff members trying to get me fired.
48169 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
M / Cresskill
Offline
Posted 5/6/13

Seissha wrote:


justanotherguy_2005 wrote:


Pomff wrote:


justanotherguy_2005 wrote:

Yes but no member of a gang remains ignorant of what is really going on with them. Even if a person isn't the one stealing from people or killing rival gang members they are just as bad by associating with them and being a part of what they do. I would rather just live a more honest life in poverty or even die an honest death early on instead of trying to better myself and my family while causing nothing but misery to everyone else.


Out of curiosity what is the poorest you've ever been? What was your family situation growing up? How many nights did you grow up not knowing if you'd have anything to eat the next day? It's really easy to claim "I would never do X" when you've never lived that kind of life.

And like Seissha said, sometimes the choice is made for you.


Thankfully we have never had issues with whether there would be food or not. We all live paycheck to paycheck and almost always have to pool everyones money together to make it through. We have definitely never had it really easy though. So yes, I did not live the kind of life that is typical of that kind of thing. But I still know myself well enough to know I would never have joined a gang. Even when I had resorted to stealing from various places I made sure it was done in a way that wouldn't affect people. Even in the incident Seissha mentioned I would have acted differently. It might not have turned out well for anyone still but there were other options. I did have a different experience growing up though which is probably why I would have just told everyone everything that was going on regardless of the consequences.


It's funny when people say they would act differently, when the options were: join the gang and don't have the family killed or tell mom who would go to the police WHO were just as corrupted and tip off the gang and then kill the entire family including her because my sister didn't even know the police were in on it until she was one of the members and when she was the GF of the head gang member. It is not as easy as you make it out to be. Where we lived is one of the poorest most gang-infested areas of the US. There were 100's of miles of desert in every direction which made moving an incredibly rough feat. My mom had to pawn off everything in her house at the dead of the night and leave secretly so nothing would tip off the gang. It was like escaping prison. I don't remember any of this because I was a baby, but I had never seen so much fear in my mom and sister's eyes when they finally told me what had happened.

So in your case, your entire family would have been brutally murdered given your option of choice. Some people choose to take the burden upon themselves rather than live with the guilt that they are the reason why their family was killed. Maybe they would do a merciful thing and kill you too along with your family if they were nice enough.



your story is really touching and I feel bad for your sister. I cant say I know how she felt , however I do know what goes on in gangs .

The most important thing is you and your family is still alive , unfortunately its a nightmare that doesn't go away with a simple waking up.

As for going to the police, most departments are ill equipped for the situation ....even the LAPD STILL has problems with gangs. And sadly when your in a gang , they have eyes everywhere so trying to get out is nearly impossible , especially in the prisons and even in our wonderful justice system, just not in the actual ranks.

2673 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / F / Sexual Chocolate
Offline
Posted 5/6/13 , edited 5/6/13

spacebat wrote:

You choose the way you live your life.

Don't try and evoke sympathy from me for people who are to weak to make it on their own. The choice is never made for you. You always have a choice.


I never claimed that there isn't always a choice, quite the opposite actually. I was never trying to evoke sympathy either. I was pointing out that people like to claim "oh you can just choose not to do something" like it's some simple easy decision.

If you managed to make the best of a bad situation great for you, not everyone has the some options you did though and I don't see how people can pass judgement on a kid for making a bad decision when based on everything they've seen in their life to that point the only choice for a better life was in selling drugs or running with a gang.

If we're talking about our own experiences I grew up without any kind of father, to the point I don't know who my father is, to a crackwhore mother who cared little to nothing about me in complete poverty. Sometimes i'd go 2-3 days without seeing the women who was supposedly my mother, the teachers at school either didn't care about my situation or wouldn't do anything to help, and to my knowledge there was nowhere to go and I was doomed to spend the rest of my life in the same shitty neighborhood with the same issues because nobody from the city to the police gave a damn about us.

So when some guy with a $75 hoody and $25,000 car came up to me and offered to pay me more money then I ever dreamed of you gotta believe I was willing to carry a package or sell some drugs if it meant having enough money to afford 3 meals a day and buy shoes without holes in them. And if occasionally one of the other "associates" suddenly leaves town or just up and disappears you don't comment because at that point you're already in and people who ask questions tend to have bad things happen to them.

Was what I did the right thing for me to do? Maybe not. Should I have done things differently? Maybe I should have. I was a kid though, and a lot of people who join gangs are just kids when they get in who don't know they have other options because nobody has ever told them they existed, or maybe they did tell them they existed but didn't explain how to achieve those options.
9546 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / F
Offline
Posted 5/6/13



I get what you are saying now.



your story is really touching and I feel bad for your sister. I cant say I know how she felt , however I do know what goes on in gangs .

The most important thing is you and your family is still alive , unfortunately its a nightmare that doesn't go away with a simple waking up.

As for going to the police, most departments are ill equipped for the situation ....even the LAPD STILL has problems with gangs. And sadly when your in a gang , they have eyes everywhere so trying to get out is nearly impossible , especially in the prisons and even in our wonderful justice system, just not in the actual ranks.



Thanks. It was pretty rough and has been rough for her to deal with what has happened, but she is still the loving person I've always known her to be, so thankfully the experience didn't take that away from her.



First  Prev  1  2  3  Next  Last
You must be logged in to post.