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Post Reply Rape-- Does the way you dress have nothing to do with it?
Posted 6/22/13
A rapist is only interested in the body. Saying "she had on tight clothing. She was asking for it!" just doesn't work.
Xeiom 
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Posted 7/9/13 , edited 7/9/13

VeniVidiVici- wrote:

Recently I've seen a picture and there are all these women screaming how the way you dress has nothing to do with rape.
I tried to tell them, in reality, there are some dresses that do provoke men, and to either guard one self from such attacks one can either dress proper, or carry a gun.

A lot of people couldn't comprehend and started saying I support rape and what not , so let me make it clear.

This topic is wether dressing DOES have to do with rape. Not about supporting/disapproving of rape ( I don't)

Now I personally think in most cases its a yes, but if you think that dressing has nothing what so ever to do with rape, please post, and reason WHY you think so.


It's admirable that you are willing to point out your understanding on the subject and it is upsetting that people are unable to contemplate what you are referring toward.


To everyone that is claiming that clothing has nothing to do with rape, please consider the following:

A Lot of theft and small crimes are committed because of opportunistic circumstances - While the committer of the crime may have a tendency toward committing the crime, they may not have actively seeked the crime beforehand. (Think someone seeing a phone on the floor, they might steal it before someone tries to come collect it. If it wasn't on the floor they probably wouldn't have been trying to take it out of peoples pockets.)

Now before I go on, this does not mean that opportunistic crime is the ONLY kind, but that people should be aware that it can be present in a rapist. I'm saying that there are rapists who aren't affected by clothing because they pre-emptively plan but there are also rapists who have not planned anything.

The ones who have not planned anything would be I suppose opportunistic rapists, their carnal desires can be raised by provocative clothing. Once carnal desires are raised then I suppose the rest would be details.
This doesn't mean that every person is going to go raping when they get turned on but rather that somebody with a tendency toward it may take an opportunity they would not have taken if they had not been aroused.

If you read this and thought "he's condoning rape", you read it wrong.
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Posted 7/10/13
I think what you wear does have a significant impact on your chances of getting raped. I think most rapist probably wouldn't even notice you if you had the right type of clothing on.

Nowadays, (and i'm just speaking in general from what i've seen) young women just wear whatever they want, and in the summer time, oh boy. It's very attractive, i'm not going to lie, but it also attracts unnecessary attention. The kind that will get you raped. It's the same thing as showing off when you're rich and rubbing it in everyone's faces. It's bound to end in disaster. I'm not saying to dress like an Amish person, but you should be aware of your surroundings. Besides, a real man would notice you regardless of what you're wearing. It's the inside that counts.
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Posted 7/14/13 , edited 7/14/13
Women can be covered head to toe and still be raped. I think using the "what you wear" argument is not only demeaning to women/men who dress with less clothes in general, but particularly most insulting to MEN IN GENERAL. To assume that a man cannot control himself to the point where he sees a person, HOLDS DOWN THAT PERSON, POSSIBLY BEATS THEM, or worse, MURDERS THEM, just so he can have a hop-hah extremely makes men look like inhumane beings that are demons lurking in the night. make love not rape porn.

I know a lot of dudes who are equally offended by this statement. I think people have a hard time distinguishing the difference between taking a look, and then wanting to rape someone. This is what rape culture is, and what it has brainwashed so many (men and women alike) into believing. Women believe it has something to do with the way you look, cause it makes them feel "safe" and that it will never happen to them if they choose to dress appropriately. This makes them feel like they have control over what happens to them, when they fail to realize in the act of rape, the victim NEVER HAD CONTROL FROM THE GET GO.

There is absolutely nothing wrong with trying to defend yourself, by never walking around at night alone, etc etc. But the fact that you have to go to that extent is truly sad, and people seem to miss this point. Also, sadly I think most people don't understand the countless situations that have people who cannot rely on someone else for protection, and even having someone else there doesn't mean you'll be safe (think of the groups of gay men whose heads are bashed in by people who just wanna beat up gay people). I do not mean to encourage people to be paranoid, but a lot of what some of you guys are saying is really.. sheltered. (in fact, i'm just gonna lump myself together with y'all to an extent cause i am living in a first world country.)

Also, a lot of you seem to be confused about the term, "feminism." Feminism simply means giving women the same amount of choices and rights that a man has. That is it. Any person who denies that women need more rights is scared of admitting there is something wrong in society because they are scared they will be lumped into a group who oppresses women. Guess what, men can be feminists, too. If you've never disrespected a person because of their gender, then you probably have nothing to worry about when reading about people referring to such injustices. But to the people who reply with such denial, it makes me wonder a bit if all the criticism hit a place too close to home and you're just merely being defensive because you took it personally?

My husband and I have a daughter. She is still little but we're doing a good job not instilling gender roles and attitudes in her so far... One wel meaning person (i say this with a shit eating grin) once told my husband, "you know when you have a son, and he's a teen and comes home late, you wanna nudge him in the shoulder and ask why he's home so late with a smile. but when you have a daughter, and she is a teen and gets home late, you don't even ask and wanna beat the crap out of her." My husband was shocked and replied appropriately, and said, "that is the stupidest thing i have ever heard, and it's not funny, or fair. Please don't ever say those kinda things in front of my daughter."

BAM. My husband is a feminist. He sees me as his equal. Coming from a super conservative traditional family myself, I'm pleasantly surprised this is possible in the world. I can only hope for the same for every youth's future on this planet. But with a heavy heart, I must say we still have a long ways to go.
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Posted 7/14/13

shotanime wrote:

My husband was shocked and replied appropriately, and said, "that is the stupidest thing i have ever heard, and it's not funny, or fair. Please don't ever say those kinda things in front of my daughter."


Your husband is awesome. Go, Shot's Hubby!
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Posted 7/14/13
I think no matter how much a man is "provoked" it is still his choice and action to rape someone else and that is never excused. A woman should be free to dress however she wants (within what is legal under public decency of course) and not have to fear being raped because a man found her attractive. Rape is always wrong and never excused.
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Posted 7/14/13
The trouble with saying that skimpy clothes causes rape is that when there is a problem: men raping women because of what they wear people will try to find a solution to it. And what is that solution in this case? For women to dress modesty and cover themselves from head to toe. How is that doing any good for women
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Posted 7/19/13
If I go out into...Detroit. The central, bad part of Detroit, dressed like Daddy Warbucks and get mugged, it is my fault. I shouldn't have dressed like that when I went out into an area I knew was dangerous.

This is not to say that people don't get raped when not wearing revealing clothing, and this is not to say that if people stop wearing revealing clothing, rape will stop completely.
BUT, if someone is incapable of resisting any urges, and happens to be a huge dick, when he sees you, dressed basically naked, you're the prime target. I mean, you're the most revealing, attractive one. You're much more noticable.
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Posted 7/20/13
Appearance always matters, in everything...
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Posted 7/22/13

creepysalad wrote:

If I go out into...Detroit. The central, bad part of Detroit, dressed like Daddy Warbucks and get mugged, it is my fault. I shouldn't have dressed like that when I went out into an area I knew was dangerous.

This is not to say that people don't get raped when not wearing revealing clothing, and this is not to say that if people stop wearing revealing clothing, rape will stop completely.
BUT, if someone is incapable of resisting any urges, and happens to be a huge dick, when he sees you, dressed basically naked, you're the prime target. I mean, you're the most revealing, attractive one. You're much more noticable.


It sounds like a reasonable theory, but the actual evidence does not support it. The most common clothing worn by rape victims, according to literally every rape crisis center that's put up the information, was jeans and a sweatshirt. Everything else fails to show even a weak correlation.

No matter how good the reasoning is behind the theory, if the theory doesn't actually match the evidence then the theory is wrong.
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Posted 7/22/13 , edited 7/22/13
Rape is initially a very primal act.
While that doesn't excuse it, it should give most women an idea of what might trigger such primal instincts deeply coded into us.
Out of the most common I'd say that such as scandalously short skirts, hotpants or even dropping your pants at your friends party because he's got a pool and you didn't care to bring a bikini!
All of those are very much guilty of provoking something in us.

We are animals, don't forget.
We just like to pretend that we are something more.
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Posted 7/22/13
I wouldn't think clothing has anything to do with getting raped, there are reports of older women being raped and you know they wouldn't wear anything provocative.

However, wearing something skimpy or provocative might increase the number of unwanted guys hitting on or flirting with you.
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Posted 7/22/13
I'm fairly sure in most cases it doesn't have an impact as the majority of the people who commit crimes like rape don't care what you look like and plan on raping you anyways. It may encourage it, but it doesn't really impact it too much.
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Posted 7/22/13 , edited 7/22/13
so much victim blaming in this post holy ish

there is no excuse for rape

if you were walking around naked it still wouldn't be ok

the fact that this is even a topic is a problem
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Posted 7/25/13
Just look at me for instant. I'm totally totally asking for it ehehe
merahk 
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Posted 7/25/13 , edited 7/25/13
Blaming the victim for the rape is like blaming livestock for looking too delicious for the wolf. It doesn't matter where they wander - get rid of the wolves so that the livestock can be free.

The focus should be on dealing with the predator, not the prey. It doesn't have anything to do with dress in any case - India is incredibly known for it's rape-crazy patriarchy, and their women pretty much cover themselves almost completely for the most part. You know what they recently did? They started to ban female store-mannequins because they "incite rape". They're entirely clueless (I'm speaking as an Indian - my home country is a horrible place to be a woman).

But then you look at the west and their dress, with a variety of 'revealing' clothes, and, while rape does happen, it's no where near the scale of India's rape society. It's something that stems from a biological urge for domination/continuation of genes + huge cultural influences that permit it. For example, it's pretty common over there for the police to actually pay off rape victims (or their families) so that they don't bring up a case or spread word that it happened. This is in conjunction with their police being rape-crazy themselves...

Anyway, blaming the victim (female) is the usual stance the dominant 'force' in a society takes to legitimize any of its own evils. It's basically a master saying that the slave they keep captive 'deserved it', and eventually, the slaves start to believe it as well. It's not the slave's fault- it's the master keeping and beating slaves that's the problem.

Let me put it this way - I can walk down the street in the USA and see people of all sorts of dress styles, no matter how revealing, talking and getting along, and have no problems. You go to a Middle East country, India, etc., and see that they always have to dress up completely to cover themselves, and rape still happens. One society's males/females can get along fine, and another society's cannot, because their males are rape crazy and their females have been indoctrinated (by religion pretty much) to not fight back. The fact that they require full dress just reveals their incapacity to control themselves.
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