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Post Reply Ever feel like an outsider in your own family?
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21 / F / Scotland
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Posted 6/30/13
I guess maybe I feel like an outsider in terms of I really do not care about how people's days have gone and unless it's relevant to me I am not really interested so I'm constantly thinking 'why are you even telling me this?' and sometimes when they try to discuss stuff with me I barely say anything at all.

In saying that though, all my family have the same sarcastic sense of humor and are not really interested in making any friends or stuff and generally understand that I have autism.
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Posted 6/30/13

x13kissmegoodbye wrote:

I've always known I was different from everyone in my family (The only child with naturally tanned skin because she's half black). But after my grandpa died (when I was 9) and my grandma died (I was 18), I've been feeling more and more like an outsider in my own home, and family. I really don't know what to do anymore. My mother is psychotic, and every "outsider" acts like they know what's going on, and like they know my entire life story. I find myself always wanting to ram my mother's head through a wall, but I could never do that, because she's my mom. I find myself getting angrier everyday, because my mother purposefully reminds me how "unimportant" a member of my family I am, and purposefully disappoints me EVERY chance she can possibly get. I have people I can talk to, both professional & personal, but now it's not getting to be enough. I'm sadder everyday that I'm angrier. Idk what I can do. The only thing to look forward to is that I'm transferring to a University in upstate New York, which is 7 hours away from Long Island (where I live), is where I can get the rest of my sanity back.


Leave home and start your own family! Then you get to partay everynight

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27 / M / United States, Vi...
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Posted 6/30/13 , edited 6/30/13
We moved away from out family when I was 10. It's been just me my mom and my brother since then. Just this year I kicked my mom out of my house. (long story, can ask if you want). Now im in Iowa by myself, while the rest of my family lives in their original area lol.
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32 / M / US
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Posted 6/30/13 , edited 6/30/13
My family (including uncles/cousins etc.) Produces one black sheep per generation. In this generation, I'm it. Before me is my mother's brother, my maternal Grandfather, I heard I had a crazy great uncle on my dad's side before that. So once a generation one side of the clan or other has a strange one. Everyone else seems to do the get a job/family/house with a picket fence thing. It makes family reunions awkward.

That doesn't need to be a bad thing. Life is not about getting dealt a good hand, it is about making the best play with the cards you're given. Standing out or not fitting in just means that you have to play things out a little differently. Fitting in is overrated anyway.
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21 / M / United States
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Posted 7/1/13
Meh. I kinda enjoy being the outsider. Gives me a chance to have something I love without ever feeling obligated to share it or explain to anyone what it means to me. Gives me a sense of independence and leverage.
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26 / M / Onmarus
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Posted 7/1/13
Just wait until you transfer, chances are you will meet new people and experience new places with new people. I'm sure you'll feel somewhat better...at least for a little while.
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31 / M / Muldrow, OK
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Posted 7/1/13
Of course. Everyone in my family like people my age are more concerned with an image and looking cool. Me I just care about having fun and enjoying life without restrictions
Posted 7/1/13
yep..for 50+ years now. My family always treated me as an outsider, so that's why I feel like one.. Maybe its because I was adopted..and yes, they provided all the basic needs, so I am grateful. But still, I think, it must be nice to belong in your family. I tried for many many years to force a "belonging" but..it just didn't work out and caused me a lot of stress and hurt feelings. So now I accept that my "family" are nothing more than acquaintances and moved on.
Posted 7/1/13
No with immediate family, but with family I do not see very much.
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25 / M / Chino ca
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Posted 7/1/13
sometimes because im the only one my age. everyone else is either a lot older than me or a lot younger than me.
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22 / F / New York
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Posted 7/2/13
I don't know how I'm gonna make it to August 22..... I'm always miserable. I just explained how my mom didn't do anything to make me feel important for graduating college, & she took it as me attacking her and saying she doesn't do anything. She asked me, "So you're upset because I didn't take you out to dinner?" I told her, "NO, I'm upset because you didn't really do ANYTHING after I graduated my first COLLEGE, and got accepted into ANOTHER ONE."

Everything is always my fault.

I guess I should just stop whining, and suck it up though.....
Posted 7/2/13

Sogno- wrote:

yes, especially when i'm outside and they're inside


why is this so funny? whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy?
Posted 7/2/13 , edited 7/2/13
This thread is insanely comforting - misery loves company I suppose, and it's good to know I'm not alone.

Ever since I was small, my extended family has never really liked me. I've always felt like an outsider because of how I look, and I'm snubbed and ignored. Naturally I don't keep in touch with them, but every now and then something will happen where I do meet them or am forced to interact. They don't change. I've always been the black sheep of the family and will continue to be.

Luckily for me, I don't love any of them and never have. Still though, meeting them sometimes is very trying.

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20 / F / LV.
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Posted 7/2/13
I feel that way with my dad's side of the family. I don't really like to interact with my cousins on that side, so you can usually find me chilling with the babies.

It's funny. I'm the outsider with my dad's side and absolutely love my mom's side, while my sister loves my dad's side and is the outsider with my mom's.
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CALI!
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Posted 7/2/13
Yep I agree well not my brother-sister-mother-fater family buy my family like cousins and stuff I feel like an outcast
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