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Post Reply Ever feel like an outsider in your own family?
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F
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Posted 7/2/13
Never ever felt that, I have nice people around me, even the family who took care of me till I was 8 y/o treated me like I'm their own and spoiled me more than their own child.
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26 / M
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Posted 7/2/13
no offense but does your mom drink a lot? she sounds kind of abusive at least...and these 'outsiders' you talk about, who are these people? mom's boyfriends? WHATEVER is going on here, clearly you shouldn't consider yourself to be an outsider, just a member of a family where there is a dysfunctional relationship. so..upstate newyork..so you transferred to binghamton maybe? my advice to you would be to read some Dostoyevsky, go into the Catskills and go to the school counseling services, they should be free and most of those people are actually pretty competent. just dont watch too much anime, look what it did to me.
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24 / F / New Zealand
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Posted 7/2/13
Yes and no.
Kinda sick of being the only one who cares about academic success, going to university etc. Parents are like "just get a job" and seem more proud of my sister who dropped out of high school at 16 sometimes.
Granted, I have a job now and the studying means I'll get paid more but whatever...
Trahma 
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30 / M / New Jersey
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Posted 7/2/13

x13kissmegoodbye wrote:

I don't know how I'm gonna make it to August 22..... I'm always miserable. I just explained how my mom didn't do anything to make me feel important for graduating college, & she took it as me attacking her and saying she doesn't do anything. She asked me, "So you're upset because I didn't take you out to dinner?" I told her, "NO, I'm upset because you didn't really do ANYTHING after I graduated my first COLLEGE, and got accepted into ANOTHER ONE."


I'm sorry things still aren't going well for you. This particular situation is a difficult to give advice on as it encompasses your relationship with your mother, which is obviously a very personal subject. To me it seems to boil down to either you decide to keep fighting for a better understanding with her, or you set aside that relationship (for now) and just focus on yourself. It sounds like you've been trying to work on your relationship for quite awhile now, possibly consider stepping back and let her reach out when she's ready. I can unfortunately tell you from experience that until she is ready to listen all the talking in the world will make little difference, and you will just continue to frustrate yourself.
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28 / M / Utah
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Posted 7/2/13
I have a great relationship with my family but they are very "vanilla" Which is actually a good thing for my sanity. But when I went to my cousins wedding, I felt SO out of place back in May of this year. I guess that should be normal since I didn't know next to nobody their.
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24 / F / Rapture
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Posted 7/3/13
The funny thing about my family is we are all just a collection of black sheep. Seven strangers that share the same blood
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25 / Jolly ol' Blighty
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Posted 7/3/13
My extended family talk over me and ignore what I say, to the point where they make comments that completely contridict things I told them moments prior..

One of the last things my brother said to me before he up and left forever was "Go throw yourself off a f-wording bridge"
My sister won't even give me the time of day and simply ignores my existance since she moved out, before she did she just invited whoever around and took over the house with strangers, somtimes people she didn't even know more than 'knows so and so'.
And finally I only seem to be able to make small talk with my mother these days.

Of course the fact I spend all my time in my room has nothing at all with feeling uncomfatable at all.

So x13kissmegoodbye I'd say going off to university if the best thing you could do for your health.

Oh, thats another one, my brother spent plenty of time reminding me what a failure I was because I did badly in my college exams, couldn't at all have been caused by him going missing during my exam period at all.
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27 / M / Kentucky
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Posted 7/3/13
The only thing that remotely makes me feel like an outsider is my beliefs. My whole family even beyond the household are strongly Christian. I'm agnostic meaning I don't really accept or refuse any particular religion (uncertain). So it gets kinda strange sometimes.
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23 / none ya
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Posted 7/3/13
Yea I think plenty of people feel this way but most of us are anti social. Every time i see my mom she tells me to read my bible. and a few years ago my family had an intervention because they thought i was a lesbian. (Im not) and then they wonder why i dont have any friends.
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55 / M / Covina, California
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Posted 7/3/13

x13kissmegoodbye wrote:

I've always known I was different from everyone in my family (The only child with naturally tanned skin because she's half black). But after my grandpa died (when I was 9) and my grandma died (I was 18), I've been feeling more and more like an outsider in my own home, and family. I really don't know what to do anymore. My mother is psychotic, and every "outsider" acts like they know what's going on, and like they know my entire life story. I find myself always wanting to ram my mother's head through a wall, but I could never do that, because she's my mom. I find myself getting angrier everyday, because my mother purposefully reminds me how "unimportant" a member of my family I am, and purposefully disappoints me EVERY chance she can possibly get. I have people I can talk to, both professional & personal, but now it's not getting to be enough. I'm sadder everyday that I'm angrier. Idk what I can do. The only thing to look forward to is that I'm transferring to a University in upstate New York, which is 7 hours away from Long Island (where I live), is where I can get the rest of my sanity back.


Hey, I'm one of Jehovah's Witnesses, Of coarse I'm an outsider within my own family, But the Bible said this would happen, or rather Jesus said it would happen during the last days of this present system of things.
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F / Pennsylvania
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Posted 7/3/13
I am one my laptop in the BASEMENT right now typing this post >_> so yeah I don't think I have to explain my relationship with the people that share my DNA
ispy12 
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23 / Canada
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Posted 7/3/13
yeah, I'm not like them but I like them and they like me...I got 4 sibblings and when we were playing teams were usually 4 vs 1
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Posted 7/3/13
We all do at some point.
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23 / M / The Future
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Posted 7/3/13
I'm fine with my immediate family, but i struggle to get along with my extended family.
Posted 7/3/13
I'm not blood but i feel like i belong with my fam
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