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Post Reply Kindness Mistaken As Flirting?
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28 / M / ←↖↓↳ Traverse Tow...
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Posted 9/2/13 , edited 9/2/13
I keep the mindset of "I can't see why anybody would ever like me" and assume they're just being kind. Being lonely is better than being put in an embarrassing or disappointing situation from the misunderstanding.

But that might just be me. ( ´ ▽ ` )ノ
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15 / F / Candy Land!!
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Posted 9/2/13
I've never had that problem, i'm considered "nice" like when you first meet me *shy...* but then they realize i have a personality disorder and that every action i take, is just a copy of someone else's *disorder acting up there :l* - plus i'm pretty blunt sooooo if i'm flirting with you, i'll tell you, Like *cute guy* i'll say Wow, your face is hot, you wanna eat lunch? idk if thats good or bad but yea lol
8569 cr points
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22 / M / México
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Posted 9/2/13 , edited 9/2/13
Every girl who showed me some "kindness" is like "how about no" when i think she's flirting with me
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20 / M / Outer Space
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Posted 9/2/13 , edited 9/2/13
Well i don't think that kindness has the same message for men and woman. When a woman is nice to a guy then the guy think's that maybe she is interested of course this is not the same with guys. When a guy is nice to a girl it can mean two things that he is interested or that maybe he just a nice guy. Then again there are many other thing that can go into this topic but i feel too lazy to type that all down but these are my two cent's on the matter PS Watch snafu(it's a anime) if you would like to go a bit deeper on the topic, show's you the world from a loner such as myself and how he perceives kindness.
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M / San Antonio
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Posted 9/3/13 , edited 9/3/13
Nope. It's always been flirting. Don't know why some girls can't just accept friendship and cut off contact completely if I don't ask them out.
Posted 9/3/13

dalmain wrote:

I don't look like a nice guy..don't judge outer appearance. I'm tall, serious looking, whatever. But I have always been nice and courteous. But I have cut it down a lot because of people's attitudes. I used to open the door for people just out of courtesy, but time after time I get the ugly faces so I've stopped that. Being nice people think that your weak or they try to take advantage of you. It's sad. When I'm nice to a female I get the impression that they think I'm coming on to them. I guess girls get hit on a lot, so they automatically think you are flirting with them. I'm still nice sometimes, but I pick and choose now. But If I really see someone in need I'll be there to help.


Wow this is exactly my problem. When I'm nice to women or even smile at them they react as if I'm trying to hit on them...
And I get either get the turned down look or a look of approval from them(when im not trying to hit on them in the first place).
I would rather have them turn me down in that situation-because they simply leave after our interaction, but when they approve
They'll do their best to start flirting and the nicest thing that I could think to do in this situation is pretent that I don't know she's
flirting with me(smile and leave smile and leave slowly), but some catch on and know I'm turning them down

This has happened soo many times I now understand that either a lot of women are use to guys being nice with out an ulterior motive,
they simply accepted this stereotype: man + showing woman any attention = he wants me , or maybe I give off some vibe that I have
been cursed with to make my life just a little more awkward every day ( sigh* good times).
Posted 9/3/13
Yes, I've done this while also witnessing it, and it's rather stupid. Why should you be extra nice to people you like, anyway?
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14 / F / イブキド
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Posted 9/3/13
This has happened to me before, and all of my female friends started making fun of me for it
8972 cr points
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20 / F / Minnesota
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Posted 11/27/13
Ughhh, people always think that my kindness means that (maybe not exactly flirting) but I'm interested in that person.

I treat everyone the same, and it really irks me when guys think that I'm singling them out because I'm simply talking to them.

I can't be mean, but aisdfhpauewfipuawhefp.

Sometimes I really hate guys because of this.

They really truly think I'm interested, when all I do is talk to them. I don't lead them on. I'm not a tease. I SIMPLY TALK TO THEM.
Annoying a'f. No me gusta.

6174 cr points
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Posted 11/27/13
Flirting to me is the same as small talk, pointless. I'm a guy if i am being polite it means i farted,Excuse me. If i asked you if you enjoyed the smell i was probably flirting.
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23 / M / UK
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Posted 11/27/13
I have the opposite problem. I'm so nice to everyone that when I actually do flirt, no one responds ):
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Posted 11/27/13
I'm not even sure what flirting is.
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19 / M / Somewhere
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Posted 12/1/13
I have it happen to me all the time. I'll talk with a girl and since it's in my nature to be sweet it often gets taken as flirting. People always tell me I was flirting with someone and I have to explain that I wasn't and then they are always like, "SUUUURRREEE". Very frustrating.
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15 / F / USA
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Posted 12/3/13
Man I hate it when that happens! I am a pretty nice person and people always think I'm flirting with them.
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15 / M / Anonymity
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Posted 12/3/13


This is my answer to most bitching about social status on CR

(But seriously no offense)
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