What i believe to be the three most important factors in a relationship and why.
743 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / M / CA
Offline
Posted 7/22/13
What i believe to be the three most important factors in a relationship, and why.

~Communication~

- One must struggle to express every little detail:
- Likes
- Dislikes
- Wants
- Needs
- Boundries

~Honesty~

- Without honesty, there are missunderstandings. Which will lead to grudges, secrets, hurt feelings, and eventualy fights.

- Be honest about your honesty, nobody is perfect and everybody is bound to lie to eachother at one point. Admit to eachother that you have lied to them but are working to be as honest with them as possible.

~Trust~

- It doesn't matter how honest the other person is, if they don't trust your words then everything else will fall apart.

~Why these three go hand in hand~

Alot of common problems can be solved with communication. But for this to work it's magic  both partners must trust each other and be honest, even when it's not pretty. 

Through communication you can find out a great many things about eachother:

-Perhaps the two of you cause more harm to eachother than good. At this point, you might want to consider you both arn't suited for eachother and it would best to move on. 

-Maybe you'll find that the both of you may experience bumps down the road, and are willing to sacrafice and work hard for the sake of the relationship. 

-Or maybe you'll both be compatible enough  to the point of being soul mates, it happens.

Why this doesn't work for everyone: Most people arn't mature enough, or choose not to put effort into these important factors that can keep relationships strong. If this is the case, either you are not ready for a relationship, or the other person is not important enough to you to go the extra mile.

However, this does not go without saying that good communication is very hard to achieve. But even the slightest effort can wield wonders. Give a try, sit down with that one person in your life who you might have problems with, and express you want to get things out in the open.

-Jesse, AKA Explorer Oak.
142 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
21 / M / United States
Offline
Posted 7/22/13
Well, you got all my concerns and explained them better than I could. I think there should be a 4th though, forgiveness. Mistakes happen, conflicts will arise, and sometimes you just plain disagree on things. If you want to stay together you'll definitely have to be able to get over and forgive these things. Within reason of course.
2182 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
29 / M / U.S.A.
Offline
Posted 7/28/13
Love? Anyone? Anyone? That should definitely be a factor.


But I actually do agree with your post. In a relationship, you're basically becoming one person with your soul mate. This is difficult, it doesn't matter who you are, because eventually you're going to start noticing things. It's not always gonna be flowers and daisies, that's for sure, but I think if you truly love this person, then even their faults will become your favorite aspects of them.
2286 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
25 / M / houston,tx
Offline
Posted 7/28/13
Ive been with the my wife since i was 11 yrs old. The main 3 things is Love, Great sex, and picking your battles.
1541 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / M
Offline
Posted 7/28/13
Trust (No-Brainer)
Communication (Understanding & Reasoning)
"Mutual" Love (Open to interpretation)

&
Not Have dreams of BF cheating with his best friend that's a girl and shanking them repeatedly in the stomach and gouging their eyes out.
32346 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
32 / M
Offline
Posted 7/29/13
Communication is the biggest one. If you stop communicating the relationship is over. And that is not just a relationship as being in love that goes for friends and a business relationship too. You know why most bands have break ups? They stopped communicating. Same goes for your relationship with your Girlfriend/Boyfriend/Wife/Husband. The second you stop talking about your problems and worries and they get bottled up it just festers and turns to resentment. "Why can't they see i am unhappy?" and then it finally explodes and it's at the point where the problems are no longer fixable.

Having your own lives. This might be a weird one for some people to get but the whole joint at the hip thing only works on TV. I have known a few couples who really get sick of each other because they have to many joint interests or they work at the same place or whatever else. I think being your own person as well as being together is important. Being able to go to work or to have your own hobbies and friends is good for you. It builds trust and confidence and means you don't cling to each other for dear life because you have nothing else. That is not healthy.

You need that time apart to be able to enjoy your time together more.


And the last one for me would probably be similar goals. It is no good if one of you has ambitions to do all this stuff the other does not. Like the husband wants to travel the world and the wife just wants to settle in their small town and have kids funded by his job at the steel mill. And that works vice versa too. Your goals and ambitions need to be similar and not just in the short term. When looking for a potential partner what they want out of life is just as important as anything else. If you want to build a life together it should be about mutual happiness and if one person has to sacrifice way more than the other to have that relationship it just builds unhappiness and the relationship becomes very one sided on the giving and taking.
1696 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
26 / M / Brisbane, Australia
Offline
Posted 7/29/13
I agree with the communication the most.
I've been in two long term relationships, where the communication just died.

I also have this rule when picking up girls. Where the mystery is the fuel for conversation. So by the time they get to know me.
I should land atleast a few dates and a kiss.

But what I think really counts is the way someone can be support your weaknesses.
Love you for the things you might hate about yourself. Just appreciating eachother's differences and understanding one another.

I used to be the type of guy, who wanted to change my gf into an ideal.
When she didn't think or do things my way, I got mad. But the gf after, I appreciated those differences and loved her for all her faults.
4761 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
Offline
Posted 8/4/13
I think in any relationship, not just romantic relationships, these 3 factors are important.
743 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / M / CA
Offline
Posted 8/4/13

millionaire09002 wrote:

Love? Anyone? Anyone? That should definitely be a factor.


But I actually do agree with your post. In a relationship, you're basically becoming one person with your soul mate. This is difficult, it doesn't matter who you are, because eventually you're going to start noticing things. It's not always gonna be flowers and daisies, that's for sure, but I think if you truly love this person, then even their faults will become your favorite aspects of them.


Well this goes without saying, there is no relationship without love. :P




TheRealEscargotpudding wrote:

I think in any relationship, not just romantic relationships, these 3 factors are important.


Of course, i believe these can benifit non-romantic relationships as well!

12450 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
93
Offline
Posted 8/6/13
With communication there will be trust and honesty, so it is actually just one important factor?
Posted 8/6/13
All you need is love, man, but that is only true when you understand what love is.
743 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / M / CA
Offline
Posted 8/7/13

bbbbbbbbbb wrote:

With communication there will be trust and honesty, so it is actually just one important factor?


Not exactly. Sure they tie in together, but each are very important just on there own. You can be completly honest with your partener, but still not trust them. Or you could be realy honest person, but not be able to communicate with your partner and get your point across.

They're all different skills you must practice. ;]
49109 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
Offline
Posted 12/13/13 , edited 12/13/13
Trust, honesty, and the ability to sit in a roomful of small children and not have the slightest clue what is going on.
23684 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
M / Fort Bragg, NC
Offline
Posted 12/13/13 , edited 12/13/13
Gummi Bears

Chocolate Milk

Klondike Bar

.. DUH
Sailor Candy Moderator
200577 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
28
Offline
Posted 11/25/14
Year-end cleanup. Closing threads with no activity since 2013.
You must be logged in to post.