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Post Reply [RP]The First Annual B.A.K.A. Awards
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Posted 8/19/13
Crunchyroll doesn't allow mods to split threads/move posts. I'm therefore duplicating the posts from the park thread here for easier reading.

The First Annual B.A.K.A. Awards

In a corner of the park, a group of men in white uniforms with gold trimming are struggling with some expensive-looking electronic equipment. They have been busy installing this mysterious assemblage for the last half hour and a crowd has started to form, hoping for some entertainment.

The Commander of the Mimawarigumi, Sasaki Isaburou, stands a little way from his labouring subordinates, his eyes fixed on his phone. He is currently composing a message to one of his favourite email buddies.

Hey there, Toshi-chan!

K-sama has us busy on your home turf.

Guess he's hoping our eliteness is catching. (#^.^#)

Details attached to email.

~Sabu-chan


An ordinary person might point out that it is very unlikely that Hijikata Toshiro will ever read this email. The Vice-Commander of the Shinsengumi has made it very clear that he doesn't care for Sabu-chan's emails, and any email Sasaki sends will likely end up in the Spam folder.

The truly exceptional observer, however, will realize that Sasaki has just officially notified the Shinsengumi of the upcoming ruckus in their home territory, and if the Shinsengumi doesn't get the message and is caught unawares, that will be entirely their own fault.

"Commander, the recording equipment is installed"

Sasaki nods, puts away his cellphone, and turns to the crowd.

"Good evening, all of you. I am certain you are wondering to what you owe the honour of our elite presence in this delightfully common neighbourhood. Don't worry. Your petty criminals and sleazy professionals are safe for today. In fact, I am the bearer of good news from his Excellency the Shogun."

There is a collective gasp from the crowd. Sasaki smiles.

"A certain Amanto prince has generously agreed not to press charges in that unpleasant incident which occurred last Friday on the main street of Kabukichou. Prince Ba - that is, Prince Hata is expected to make a full recovery from his injuries, and has expressed a desire to put the unfortunate experience behind him and use this golden opportunity to mark a new era in Kabukichou's relationship with the rest of the universe.

In other words, the idi- illustrious prince is generously offering the sum of ten million yen to finance a project to uplift and improve Kabukichou from its current squalid state. His new charitable foundation - the Brotherhood of Amanto and Kabukichou Altruists - is opening up a contest to determine the recipient of this prize.

As Edo's elite police force, the Mimawarigumi has been selected to oversee this contest. I do not intend to waste my time listening to your proposals in person.


He gestures to the machine.

"This high-tech piece of recording equipment is here to record your contest submissions. Press the red button and it will begin to record. Any person or persons may make a presentation to the camera of their idea to improve Kabukichou. I do warn you, however, that I very sincerely doubt that any of you commoners have the ability to come up with an idea of any usefulness. In the quite likely event that no project is deemed worthy of funding, Prince Baka - excuse me - Prince Hata will donate the money to Save Our Serpents Inc., a group devoted to the reintroduction of Sea Serpents into Edo Bay.

I believe that is all. Do enjoy yourself with this contest, at least."


He begins to walk away, then turns back.

"One small thing: my Vice-Commander is eagerly awaiting the first attempt to steal this valuable equipment from the park. Please don't abandon your plans of larceny and deny her that pleasure."
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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by sanchez2007x1



*Wait's for everyone's attention to divert a bit before going up to the machine and pressing record*

Hello! I am the Queen of Kabukicho!
As the queen on this side of town, I believe my plan is the best to improve Kabukicho!


*holds out a sketched out drawing of Kabukicho *


First, I believe we have to divide the area into territories:

I'll be in charge of the middle, of course,
The pigs shall get the upper right corner
The homeless are on the left, preferably in something they can't dig out of.
The ducks are on the bottom left
The zoo on the mid bottom,
and the fishes at the very bottom.

Of course, MY Kabukicho won't tolerate baddies. They shall be sent to the Seppuku grounds aka the "Btooom! prison" to be taken care of.

*ends main presentation*

Again, I am the Queen of Kabukicho. Just whisper that name out somewhere and you'll be able to find me. ^__^

*intentionally doesn't give out name and location for safety reasons. The recording ends.*
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Posted 8/19/13 , edited 8/19/13
Originally posted by farispie



As Otae gives her presentation, Gintoki can't help but worry .


( Isn't this a bit dangerous ? Why is Gin-san with the fishes ? Gin-san has just recently eaten a devil fruit you know ? He can't swim. He still has to be king of the pachinko players . )


(Well isn't she a bit too confident ? She thinks she is so charming with that wink of hers ? This isn't about charms, its about good ideas . I'll just have to show her what its about . )


Gintoki takes a gallant stride towards the stage . He looks straight at the camera and confidence can be seen beaming from his face.

He takes out a card .

Bystander : Whats G....intoki doing ? ...Is that a cue card ?.....Why is he wearing that anyways ?


"Ladies and Gentleman . I have been living in this great town of Kabukichou for a couple of years now. I .....think we really should think about how this town can improve for the better. This isn't some popularity contest you know ? So for all you other contestants, don't think being flashy is gonna win you anything "

*Sighs *


*Puts his hand through his hair *


People just don't understand



"Seriously , I hope you people are serious about this . "

*Twirls around and points straight at the camera with a smile. His teeth can be seen shining *

*He points at the card and the words, YORUZUYA WILL HELP , can be seen on it *




Bystander : HE IS TRYING TOO HARD TO BE CHARMING .

"The problem is that this town needs more businesses that can cater to both Amanto and Humans alike. ......I mean for example ...at this great place called the Yoruzuya, they aren't discriminatory against particular beings you know ? "

Bystander : HE IS JUST TRYING TO PROMOTE HIS BUSINESS .

"See I truly believe that no matter who you are, there are similarities between us all that we can enjoy. I mean isn't there an S and M in every species ? Survival of the fittest you know ? So with that in mind how about we open more of those S and M parlors ?

Bystander : HE JUST WANTS TO SATISFY HIS FANTASIES

"Of course there are differences between us and those differences must be taken into account as well. For example, some people like to eat sweets and some people don't . So we got to find a way to help those who don't like sweets ...and ...to those who like mayo too . "

*Smiles *

"To those people. ....I think we should :




*Points at Otae''s picture *

"Send them to the Seppuku Grounds "


BYSTANDER : WHAT HAPPENED TO ACCEPTING DIFFERENCES ? HE IS EVEN MOOCHING OFF OF OTAE-SAN'S IDEA NOW !

*Looks at camera *

"Well I hope everyone has learned a thing or two about what it means to make the world a better place. "


Bystander : ...I learned that the world needs to become a better place now .......

*Gintoki leaves the stage and smirks *

(Well I think I got this one in the bag . TEN MILLION YEN HERE I COME ! )
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Posted 8/19/13 , edited 8/19/13
Originally posted by runnerup78



*see's some commotion going on*

A-Ano, what's going on here? G-Gin-san....N-Nee-san? A-re?
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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by sanchez2007x1



This is a contest on who should take over Kabukicho and make it a better place... but don't worry Shin-chan, I didn't forget about you in my presentation. ^_^

*actually forgot completely about him. Takes a quick moment to think of something for him to do in her plan*

*Pulls out hairband:*



You could 'deal' with the people who don't like sweets and who like mayo in the Seppeku Grounds.

Bystander : NOW THEY ARE JUST MOOCHING OFF EACH OTHER.
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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by runnerup78



N-Nee-san... is it really a good idea to go change around so many distinguishing aspects of the area? I mean, newcomers to the series would just get confused, seeing that we don't have a straight plot in the first place. They would watch older episodes and think that this anime is not consistent. Our editors already have a hard time dealing with the complaints we receive from the PTA and from other anime artists like N*ruto or One P*ece...

Sigh... we should focus on strengthening our foundations before we can change anything else in the area. I suggest we do a quick recap for the newcomers: The land of the samurai... it was a long time since we were last called that...


(flashbacks start rolling)
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Posted 8/19/13 , edited 8/19/13
Originally posted by farispie



Gintoki looks back to see Otae and Shinpachi on the stage.

(Are they going with a family appeal ? They think that the brother and sister duo is gonna appeal to these people ? ..

Gintoki walks up to the stage and decides take off his jacket . He decides to undo the top buttons of his shirt to show a bit of skin underneath.



*Looks at Otae *

(You're not the only who can pull of the charms. Don't you already have enough cash ? The 10 million yen is mine ! )

*Looks at Shinpachi *

"You're absolutely right. We need to worry about our foundations first. What is the foundation ? "

*Looks at Camera *

"I think....foundation relies on family . For you see, each family is something of a small community. A singular community has family at its base. Communities are dependent on other communities to survive. ...Thus one community joins together to become two. Two communities join together to become four. "

*Places one hand on Shinpachi's shoulder and one hand one Otae's shoulder*

"Thus isn't Kabukichou really one big family ? Shouldn't we provide an environment where both Amanto and humans alike can happily raise a family ?"

*Laughs in a exaggerated and obnoxious manner*
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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by sanchez2007x1



How Tae looks:

Now now Shin-chan,Gin-san, isn't it a bit too harsh to be criticizing the competition like that?

ACTUAL TAE thru ESP:

ACTUAL TRANSLATION: YOU TWO DARE MOCK MY PLANS? I KNOW WHERE YOU TWO LIVE.

Anways, we are all already acting like one big family and now look where it has gotten us. There is already rebellious teenagers and those in their midlife crisis causing a lot of trouble everywhere. *insert image of Shinpachi and Kondo here* That's were the Seppeku Grounds comes in.
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Posted 8/19/13 , edited 8/19/13
Originally posted by runnerup78



*doesn't recognise Otae's threat*

hhhhmmmm...... so a way to improve Kabuki-cho...huh?

(scene shifts to another: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=quTJ_pOqv78)

(as the scene comes back, Shinpachi is seen with a grin and a massive nosebleed)

T-That's what we need...

*Now that Shinpachi put together a vision for what HE want for Kabuki, Otae and Gintoki did not look like his sister and mentor anymore.... no they were rivals....*



S-So... Gin-san...a-aren't you hungry? I'm sure Nee-san cooked something nice for you....

*thinking: Nee-san won't be too much of a problem, I must take out the General first... if Gin-san is gone, I can appease Nee-san by adding some of her designs... Gin-san MUST go....gomene Gin-san....but you are an EYESORE*

BYSTANDER: D-Did that Megane just have a 180 degree change in personality? W-Wait, is he releasing that weird malicious aura? WHAT'S GOING ON?
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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by kuroneko07



A contest to improve Kabukichou, eh?


*A sudden voice spoke, and everyone turned to see a figure going up the stage.*





Kabukichou's the hardest to tame district in all Edo. As with a noble clan, it is the black sheep that rebels and follows its own set of rules. As such-- it needs an iron hand to take control of it. And so--


*stands in front of the camera*


The plan to improve Kabukichou should be as intricate as a plan to seize a country. Treat it as how one would treat a battlefield.
Thus, I present you--



*holds up a paper to the camera*



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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by farispie



Thus the stage of war is set baby

Gintoki looks at the other people on stage with him .

Shinpachi of the Glasses Front.

Demon Hostess, Otae.

Otae's Knight, Kyubie.

These are his opponents.

(This isn't gonna be easy. Kyubie will surely support Otae in this thing. In other words, ...if I win Otae over to my side, then surely Kyubie will follow. Shinpachi might be thinking the same thing as well. ........However, Otae might use her sibling authority on Shinpachi to bring him over to her side. . ..So there is a potential chance of me fighting against the three of them at once. )

(So in other words.........)

*Gintoki gets off the stage *


Bystander Where is he going? Has he ran out of plans to rip off ?

*Gintoki looks to the bystander and puts his hands on the bystander's shoulder *

*Smiles*

"You know , this is a bit silly isn't it? Why do we gotta worry about improving Kabukichou now just because of some Amanto ? Isn't this our town already? Lets improve on our own terms, don't you think? "


Bystander : .W..-what do you mean?


"Just come up there with me . "

Gintoki and the bystander get on stage.

*Looks to the camera *

"I think we got a bit of a problem here. See, at the end of the day, someone is gonna review these tapes right? Its not like the citizens of Kabukichou will exactly be picking the winner here. Its gonna be the guy at the other side of the screen who makes the shots. So if we are gonna do this, lets at least make sure Kabukichou's citizens talk to the camera together. "


*Smirks*


"I propose we set up a bit of a council right here on stage. You know basically we can bring up a bunch of citizens up here and just talk things out. Instead of having each of us present ideas and just hope the guy watching these tapes will go with our individual ideas, lets just discuss together the best possible choice "

*looks at Bystander*

"How about it ? "


Bystander : Thats a pretty good idea.


"Good. Anyone is welcome on stage to talk things out . However, we gotta make sure things are a bit orderly here. Lets have a president or something to make things run smoothly. ..It doesn't really matter who, its just a title . Do you wanna do it ...Mr..... "

Bystander : Its Yamato. Well you're right, its just a title. I don't mind doing if it means everyone gets a say. To be honest, I thought your ideas....were a bit too much.

"Well isn't that great ! Everyone give a hand to Yamato -San "

*Looks at Otae, Shinpachi and Kyubie *




(....In other words, I'll just remove the power struggle from those three, and I'll work on my new puppet here to my side)

"I presume there are no objections ? "

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Posted 8/19/13 , edited 8/19/13
Originally posted by runnerup78



A-Ano... Yamato-san? Why don't you come over here, and take a seat?

*Shinpachi is pointing at a chair near him*

(thinking: I see what you are trying to do, Gin-san, appease the general public? Well, I won't let you do that!!!)

Yamato-san? Why don't you present some ideas to the audience?

Yamato: Well, for starters, we need some kind of public transportation as well as health ca-...

Hai! How right you are! You know who can promote that easily? Otsu! With her, I'm sure with her resources we can work something out easily!!!

Bystander: He's not even letting him speak out! But the megane does have a point...

(thinking: ha ha ha! Gin-san, if I win over the audience, then it will be easier to put across MY PLANS)

Of course, we'll include Nee-san's plan into it, she does have a valid point, we can use schematics and EXCLUDE the Seppukku grounds (a bit too hard core)...

(thinking: it's not a good idea to go against Nee-san, but if I win her over to my side, Kyubei-san will follow)

So, excuse me for interrupting you, Yamato-san, please do go on...

Bystander 1: I think I'll put my vote to the Megane... he listen's to us!

Bystander 2: Yeah, and Otsu aside, he'll consider what's best for Kabuki-cho!!!

*The bystanders are starting to cheer: MEGANE! MEGANE!!*

(thinking: KORAA... it's not MEGANE!!! But everything is moving along smoothly....*grins* your move, Gin-san...)
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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by sanchez2007x1



Kyuu-chan, you don't have to use my plans. *is flattered* Here, I made you your own plans so we could have double chance of winning:

. . .
. . .
. . .

*after hearing Gintoki, Shinpachi, and Yamato's argument, Tae gets up and faces EVERYONE:*

Do you know what would happen to all of you if the democracy proposal falls through because of that ONE guy behind the screen? *points at her picture to show them*

But thank you all for risking your lives to be here. ^_^
*says it kindly, but was actually trying to strike fear into them... and it works.*

*The bystanders get a sudden stroke of fear*

*looks at Shinpachi and Gintoki*

(SORRY. IF I DON'T TAKE OUT THE TRASH EARLY, IT WOULD START TO STINK.)
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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by kuroneko07



*sees the plan Otae made for her*

*blushes*



T-tae-chan.. y-you didn't have to.

*listens to Otae until she stops talking*

Yes, you people are truly citizens of Kabukichou. Your courage to uphold democracy and to have your voices heard is proof enough.

*applauds the crowd, oblivious of the ashen faces staring fearfully at them*

However, for the voice of the people to be heard, a leader must rise and unite them into one. No army goes to war without a general. No war is won with a disorganized troop. Fighting a battle does not rest in the voice and power of the people alone-- it needs a leader, a general, a queen!



BYSTANDER: Wait-- why does it feel like we're suddenly going to war?

You, sir!

*Kyuubei suddenly points her sword at the bystander*



Tell me, among the people standing here on stage, who do you think is the one most fitting to lead you all?

BYSTANDER: *shaking* T-that's... well... to be honest--

Would you trust your life on a samurai like him?



or to a megane like that?



Hah! You shall all await your death at the seppuku grounds with them at the lead.

*Trembling uncontrollably, the bystander falls back as the crowd whispered, agreeing.*

(Heh-- with this, Tae-chan's win is guaranteed!)
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Posted 8/19/13
Originally posted by thenoob12



(thinks to himself; my clever disguise as Yamato has somehow fooled these citizens, fascinating. I must commend Matsudaira for a job well done.)



If I may, I believe a better solution would be to have all four of you be a part of a council where each of you hold equal power on making a decision on this dilemma you have on your plans. If there comes a problem where you four disagree, you all can compromise to resolve this issue.

*Glances at everyone's reaction*

(I think that this solution would be best as the people can decide on what is best for them)
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