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Have you ever Loved at the wrong time??
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29 / M / USA
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Posted 11/26/13
While I wouldn't necessarily say that I've loved, was rejected, then was the object of unwanted love, I have been in a vaguely similar situation. Possibly in reverse. Allow me an attempt at elaborating.

In my 3rd year of high school I met a peculiar girl who was not at all my type. One of the first things I can remember her telling me is that one day she would get me to go out with her. Me being the young and uncertain lad that I was, I can only assume that I misinterpreted this as a joke initially. However, after about a month's time of getting to know her and listening to her advances, I finally agreed.

We were together for a total of about 6 days. Ah, those lovely young romances.

We remained friends afterwards, but at some point she left school and I though I would have never met her again, however due to the power of the then newly formed social media websites, we were able to get into contact once more.

I cannot recall what it was that happened, but when we met next - after the standard exchange of a long list of emails, naturally - I was absolutely enthralled. She was someone who spoke to me in every way, and had captured my every last thought. Looking back, I don't think I was able to confess these feelings to her. I don't remember where I was in life, exactly, but I can remember things being complicated (as things in life tend to be).

Oh, but I was so enamored with her.

Unfortunately, she had a natural skill in vanishing. We would begin to get close, and then she would be gone, all traces of her gone. Months later, she would appear again, find me, then the cycle begun anew.

This happened for a few years, this cycle of meeting, falling in love, vanishing, and dealing with the pain.

The last time we spoke, she had taken a husband and had born a young boy. It was at that point that I realized my feelings for her were more than likely just superficial, given that I was so easily able to switch from pure desire for her, to a happiness for her place in life.

Alas, she vanished not too shortly after that, and I haven't heard from her since. That was about 3 years ago, if I recall correctly.

So...I guess in the end it was a reverse version of the original story posted here. How fun.

Hmm...

If I had to leave a moral for whomever decides to read this, I suppose it would be the standard "don't regret not doing something!" that is left behind in so many places. Yes, that should do for now.

(I don't know how to end forum posts :P)


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23 / M / 私の心は、日本で
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Posted 11/26/13
Well first i gotta say that the dance choreography was awesome and made me realize, not only Korean K-pop or other Asian pop stars know how to dance!

As for the question. I don't get crushes easily. So i just don't have that much to say.
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Posted 11/26/13
Yes.

I had a crush in high school and I couldn't tell if he was into me or not. Years later, when I broke up from a long term relationship, he showed some interest. We went on maybe one or two dates, but at the time I was on the rebound and confused about my feelings toward him. Maybe he sensed that or maybe he didn't but obligations had him disappear for a few months during the summer. I got tired of waiting for him and met my current boyfriend.

Then years after that we met again, and I was struck by how much I still liked him. I started thinking about him at work, at home... I dreamed about him all the time. But... We're both in relationships with other people and I will never ask him if he feels the same. Right now, we're friends. And that is how my story ends.
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28 / M / wherever my work...
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Posted 11/26/13
Nope. I don't like someone then; i don't same person now. Easy as that. Never had a crush.
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Posted 11/26/13
Have I ever loved at the wrong time? Well there was this one time during Mass...
Posted 11/26/13 , edited 12/6/13

deformity wrote:

While I wouldn't necessarily say that I've loved, was rejected, then was the object of unwanted love, I have been in a vaguely similar situation. Possibly in reverse. Allow me an attempt at elaborating.

In my 3rd year of high school I met a peculiar girl who was not at all my type. One of the first things I can remember her telling me is that one day she would get me to go out with her. Me being the young and uncertain lad that I was, I can only assume that I misinterpreted this as a joke initially. However, after about a month's time of getting to know her and listening to her advances, I finally agreed.

We were together for a total of about 6 days. Ah, those lovely young romances.

We remained friends afterwards, but at some point she left school and I though I would have never met her again, however due to the power of the then newly formed social media websites, we were able to get into contact once more.

I cannot recall what it was that happened, but when we met next - after the standard exchange of a long list of emails, naturally - I was absolutely enthralled. She was someone who spoke to me in every way, and had captured my every last thought. Looking back, I don't think I was able to confess these feelings to her. I don't remember where I was in life, exactly, but I can remember things being complicated (as things in life tend to be).

Oh, but I was so enamored with her.

Unfortunately, she had a natural skill in vanishing. We would begin to get close, and then she would be gone, all traces of her gone. Months later, she would appear again, find me, then the cycle begun anew.

This happened for a few years, this cycle of meeting, falling in love, vanishing, and dealing with the pain.

The last time we spoke, she had taken a husband and had born a young boy. It was at that point that I realized my feelings for her were more than likely just superficial, given that I was so easily able to switch from pure desire for her, to a happiness for her place in life.

Alas, she vanished not too shortly after that, and I haven't heard from her since. That was about 3 years ago, if I recall correctly.

So...I guess in the end it was a reverse version of the original story posted here. How fun.

Hmm...

If I had to leave a moral for whomever decides to read this, I suppose it would be the standard "don't regret not doing something!" that is left behind in so many places. Yes, that should do for now.

(I don't know how to end forum posts :P)




Lol you don't need a perfect ending just the truth is good enough for me.


Deeds1987 wrote:

Yes.

I had a crush in high school and I couldn't tell if he was into me or not. Years later, when I broke up from a long term relationship, he showed some interest. We went on maybe one or two dates, but at the time I was on the rebound and confused about my feelings toward him. Maybe he sensed that or maybe he didn't but obligations had him disappear for a few months during the summer. I got tired of waiting for him and met my current boyfriend.

Then years after that we met again, and I was struck by how much I still liked him. I started thinking about him at work, at home... I dreamed about him all the time. But... We're both in relationships with other people and I will never ask him if he feels the same. Right now, we're friends. And that is how my story ends.


Wow quite the complicated situation...much more than mines. More power to you

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39 / M / New Jersey
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Posted 11/26/13 , edited 11/26/13
I have a best friend who I have known for 12 years. I met her when I moved to California from New Jersey after college. We had an instant connection and would spent all day and night together drinking and chilling, just enjoying our youth. We each always had a bf or gf during this time but our attraction to each other was undeniable. Sometimes during that period of time we would get too drunk and makeout or take it further but never actually have sex.

Anyway, after about seven years living in the same town as her I decided to move away after a particularly hard breakup. Fast forward to today. She is now married and lives in the same town and I am in a commited relationship with my gf who I live with back in NJ. We still visit each other every couple of years and get drunk, laugh and reminisce. Sometimes we talk about what might have been when the wine flows particularly free that day. It is the deepest friendship I have ever known and I wouldn't have it any other way.
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26 / M / Socal
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Posted 11/26/13
Have you ever loved someone who didn't love you back at the time, but later along in life fell for you head over heels to find that you moved on?

nope. I've never had a... wait I did (I think ), but I just didn't act on it, too shy. Also oblivious as hell, terrible combo. (even if a friend told me she was interested, I would still doubt it...)
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22 / M
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Posted 11/26/13
Nope. I've had roughly three crushes. Or maybe just two and a half. Neither were particularly strong, more like a vague interest.
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17 / M / Galaxy
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Posted 11/26/13
I fell for many,but none will ask me out.So i still deny ''love'' feelings till now.
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29 / M / USA
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Posted 11/26/13 , edited 11/26/13

marcel20 wrote:



Lol you don't need a perfect ending just the truth is good enough for me.


Right...well, when posting at 03:00 you tend to just let things get a little strange...and at that time, my strangeness led me to want to leave some sort of ending. So...a barrage of emotes for you!

As for the truth...well, my truth is probably different from her truth. I said what I remember, but memory tends to fail us at times (or at least it does for me). Alas....

another strange forum post end!

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Posted 11/26/13
I believe so many things in life are based on timing. Had I met my husband two years earlier or ten years later we probably wouldn't be together. Sometimes you'll meet up with someone from your past and have a future, but it rarely happens. People don't date, or break up for a reason. Just a thought.
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Posted 11/26/13
I guess you could consider my tale as "loving at the wrong time":
I was about 12 years old, I had a crush on of my very close friends, which was ofc a girl. Turns out she started going out with my best friend, but I didn't mind as they were both happy, and both my closest friends. Then summer came, and she told me they broke up, she was in tears every day. I wanted to help her, but I couldn't meet her, I only knew her from school and we were in vacation. I then decided I would tell her I had always loved her (through email or wtv), but unlucky me, she had just moved out, changed email and all that, because it seems she was extremely depressed from many events in her life, her parents' divorce, her boyfriend... I then lost contact with her, and never got to hear from her again. :x
Posted 11/26/13
I don't really think one can "love at the wrong time."

I've always been operating under the belief that true love requires nothing in return. I have loved for years and years and have been hurt and have had doubts but at the end of the day, true love (in my opinion) is something that neither diminishes nor disappears. It may give the impression that it does, but it will always linger, no matter what. If it ever goes away completely, then it is not love.




Posted 11/26/13 , edited 11/26/13

demongurrl13 wrote:

I don't really think one can "love at the wrong time."

I've always been operating under the belief that true love requires nothing in return. I have loved for years and years and have been hurt and have had doubts but at the end of the day, true love (in my opinion) is something that neither diminishes nor disappears. It may give the impression that it does, but it will always linger, no matter what. If it ever goes away completely, then it is not love.






Once I met her...she became a part of my history, a part that can never be erased nor replaced. You are right that the love never goes away completely, also there is puppy love, infatuation, sexual attraction, admiration and lust...these can feel like love, yet the end results differ. Once I break-up with someone or lose interest I must remove them from my life, because I have to move on and the only way for me is to never see them again(with out this I cannot move on). No pictures, gifts momento's or clothing that reminds me of that person...only in my memories will they remain. "Love at the wrong time" is more of a romantic notion than a real one...a thought that leads to nowhere, but yields understanding to a uncontrollable force. It simply asks what if?
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