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Have you ever "Cut yourself" before?
Posted 12/9/13

Strahfobiya wrote:

I think I just started using forums for anxiety and found some threads about it. Everything was getting worse and I thought I was helping it by following all my thoughts so much I couldn't be around people because it was so scary... so I didn't care, I just cut.

But if i'm gonna be accurate here's something I said when I was feeling this way...

You do get to this point though where it's like ****, I need to cut more... and it becomes your first option, you actually like doing it... and just a warning, you'll get used to the pain and start to cut deeper or think you're not bleeding enough. I'd stop as soon as you can, it can get addicting... it switches your mind to the pain you vented on yourself which is easier to handle for a while but soon you'll start to realize that you're doing it because you don't love yourself... it's not a cure, it's horrible... and soon you'll run out of places to cut and start going for places that can be seen. it won't get you anywhere, before it's too late don't even think about it.


Oh, okay. Good job breaking out of the addiction. You said that everything was getting worse and you thought you were helping it by following all your thoughts. I didn't get that. Were you trying to make cause and effect conclusions in your thoughts regarding how people are around you and or how you affect those around you?
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Posted 12/9/13
I...like feeling pain, for some reason. I've tried to cut myself, not for any other reason other than to see how it feels. It didn't work.
Posted 12/9/13

Sornette wrote:


Strahfobiya wrote:

I think I just started using forums for anxiety and found some threads about it. Everything was getting worse and I thought I was helping it by following all my thoughts so much I couldn't be around people because it was so scary... so I didn't care, I just cut.

But if i'm gonna be accurate here's something I said when I was feeling this way...

You do get to this point though where it's like ****, I need to cut more... and it becomes your first option, you actually like doing it... and just a warning, you'll get used to the pain and start to cut deeper or think you're not bleeding enough. I'd stop as soon as you can, it can get addicting... it switches your mind to the pain you vented on yourself which is easier to handle for a while but soon you'll start to realize that you're doing it because you don't love yourself... it's not a cure, it's horrible... and soon you'll run out of places to cut and start going for places that can be seen. it won't get you anywhere, before it's too late don't even think about it.


Oh, okay. Good job breaking out of the addiction. You said that everything was getting worse and you thought you were helping it by following all your thoughts. I didn't get that. Were you trying to make cause and effect conclusions in your thoughts regarding how people are around you and or how you affect those around you?


Yeah it was getting much worse because I knew I had to stop believing the delusion that I could conclude my anxious thoughts and make sense of them, because it was all in my head, and i did it so much I didn't know the difference between my head and everything around me... But I was obsessive in following them. And I felt really confused because I thought I was going to get better by doing it.
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Posted 12/9/13
There are better ways to get attention or relieve stress. Even if your doing it for the thrill, you would be better off doing something like extreme sports, gaming, or something. If you don't mind getting hurt then atleast turn it into an activity...

Obviously I haven't cut myself, intentionally anyway.
Posted 12/9/13
Nope, but I've held a knife to my own chest before. That was pretty exhilarating, knowing I was one bad decision away from certain death.

I remember doing some research on depression and cutting for a paper I did. I learned a lot of interesting things. I always thought people who cut are people who want to die. Apparently, I was very wrong.
Posted 12/9/13
I've come close, but mostly I've used other methods of self harm in the past. It always happened when I was really upset about something/blamed myself and couldn't control my emotions that well. It made me calm down, however I was upset with myself afterwards. Now I try to use music to combat those feelings, though I worry I won't be able to get to some fast enough (especially since my mp3 player's broken).
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Posted 12/9/13 , edited 12/9/13
Why the hell would you want to cut yourself intentionally. Hardcore masochists in this forum...damn.
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Posted 12/9/13
yes and that is all i'm going to say
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Posted 12/9/13
Your life must be pretty miserable if you have to go to those lengths to feel some sort of emotion or pain... or whatever it is people use these days.
Posted 12/9/13

Assassinx89 wrote:

Are you stupid? Why the hell would you want to cut yourself intentionally. Hardcore masochists in this forum...damn.


If you say I am, I must be.
Posted 12/9/13 , edited 12/9/13

Assassinx89 wrote:

Are you stupid? Why the hell would you want to cut yourself intentionally. Hardcore masochists in this forum...damn.


No, I'm not stupid (going by what I've been told-especially since I take honor classes and plan on taking AP courses in school and on my own). Do you honestly think I enjoyed the pain? No, no I did not; I just wanted some sort of relief from what I was feeling and that was the only way out that I saw during those times.
Do I think it was a smart decision? No. I don't, but you know what, sometimes people do things that aren't smart. Not having a way out and being desperate for one is not stupidity, but it can be said that less violent actions would be better than the ones I carried out.




Homucifer wrote:


Assassinx89 wrote:

Are you stupid? Why the hell would you want to cut yourself intentionally. Hardcore masochists in this forum...damn.


If you say I am, I must be.


*gives cookie* You're far from it; He just needs to be more polite.
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Posted 12/9/13
I cut in middle school. Occasionally, I have the urge to relapse.
Posted 12/9/13

Assassinx89 wrote:

Are you stupid? Why the hell would you want to cut yourself intentionally. Hardcore masochists in this forum...damn.


No, sometimes there isn't really an escape. If you haven't been through it why are you so quick to label people as masochists because they harm themselves? Is it really that hard to believe? If you see yourself so negatively or have been through a lot of shit and can't get rid of the feeling it left you with then cutting helps you but leaves you more scarred everytime.
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Posted 12/9/13
I almost did.But I know quite a few friends of mine did.
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Posted 12/9/13 , edited 12/9/13


Yay!
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