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Slapping a girl?
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44 / M / WA
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Posted 1/31/14 , edited 2/4/14
In episode 16 of Golden time
- was he justified? Would that be considered abuse in America? Also, does a slap help a girl "freaking out" to calm down ...or is that just fiction? When is and is not a slap justified?

A Youtube of anime's top slaps would be interesting - if it doesn't already exist.

added spoiler tags per mod report ~Csgod0

Okay, but I don't really get it
Cross0 
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22 / M / Illinois
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Posted 1/31/14
Why does this question only apply to girls? I really don't think violence is the right way to calm someone down or teach them a lesson regardless of gender/age.
Posted 1/31/14
A slap says: Listen to me!

The shock of it, not the pain, usually brings people back to their senses.

I think it's better than getting backhanded or punched or whatever else.
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20 / F / Australia
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Posted 1/31/14
In regards to this specific situation - of slapping a girl because she fell asleep at the wheel, nearly killing all the passengers present - I may not have done the same thing, but if it was my own child or my own blood who not only risked the life of others, but of herself, I would be extremely worried. We've seen similar concepts in anime time and time again, just in different situations and to varying degrees. Girls hitting, punching or play punching her love interest after he does something obscenely reckless or gets hurt protecting her. The girl was worried sick to the point it's expressed as anger, but in actuality she was worried sick. Protagonists have also been slapped when they lose themselves or sight of their path and take a turn for the worse, they get slapped and told to snap out of it so your theory on a slap helping to calm someone down may have some basis to it, however I'm sure a little studying on Google can help you find an accurate answer as what may be portrayed in anime, may not be applicable to real life and may simply be a TV show/anime cliche. Parents can also be seen aggressively grabbing their child's arm(s)/shoulders after they've done something reckless than has endangered their lives, it's because the parent(s) are insanely worried and scared. This type of scenario can be explained through neurobiology. Can you see how this could apply to the situation presented in Golden Time? It is not confined to gender, race, age or other factors and can be exhibited by various manners to varying degrees.
Posted 1/31/14
Maybe domestic violence in Asia is not seen as much of a big deal as in Western countries. Just look at certain animes, where the sensei throws a chalk wiper at the student, in Japan it's ok to do this, but if you do that in Australia, you'd lose your teaching licence.

Likewise for domestic violence, hitting a child with a ruler is not even seen as "domestic violence" in Asia, it's seen as disciplining your child and is encouraged by the sheeps of Asian society.

I don't like parents using violence to discipline children because then those children will grow up thinking it's ok to use violence to discipline their own children. At the same time, I don't like the Western idea of telling parents how to discipline their children either.
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23 / M / Kaguya's Panties
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Posted 1/31/14
A slap is fine if there's a good reason, but a backhand is bad.
Posted 1/31/14
My mum slapped then gave me the back hand once ..
Just once ..

I loved her even more since then <3
Wake up call some time is needed. For sho ;]

I don't think it's abusive. Honestly kids now a days are spoiled,
a little lesson wouldn't hurt. Obviously not to the extreme like hitting
and banging their heads like some fucking idiots. Thinking about it
gets me so fucking mad.
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M / Vancouver, BC, Ca...
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Posted 1/31/14

PRose- wrote:


I don't think it's abusive. Honestly kids now a days are spoiled,
a little lesson wouldn't hurt. Obviously not to the extreme like hitting
and banging their heads like some fucking idiots. Thinking about it
gets me so fucking mad.


This.

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39 / M / Florida
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Posted 1/31/14
One slap wouldn't be abuse in the technical sense of the word. If it was multiple and in succession, then it could be.

Of course Americans are so willingly able to want to make everything a horrible crime and gladly give up punishing a child, that some child services lawyer would probably be at your door taking away your kid and slapping you with an insane lawsuit before your hand even drew back.

As for the "freaking out" part of your question, that always makes me think of the movie "Airplane" (and the sequel), but honestly, it's probably mostly old age thinking and a bit of fiction. I know more guys who freak out like that before any of the women.
As stated above, it would be a wake up call and something startling to snap someone out of a panic, but it would be easier and better to try to talk them down first.
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30 / M / Atlanta, GA
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Posted 1/31/14
Reported for spoiling episode 16. I kid, I kid. I think the overly sensitive people will cry abuse for a slap, and while I've never witnessed it myself or partaken with such an act, I wouldn't overreact if the situation was justified.

My sister slapped my niece once, and her dad was proud of my sister for doing such a thing. I think my sister (her mother) wasn't happy about it, nor was my mother when she heard of it, but it seemed the males found no harm in it, whereas the females took offense to it.

Her dad is also a police officer, while the mother is a teacher (where everyone's a pansy nowadays and everyone cries bullying at every turn) so that could also factor into the reactions. Not sure whether it worked either, I live 400 miles away and didn't really care to get details, but I think they say it helped open my niece's eyes.
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37 / F / Prince George BC
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Posted 1/31/14
My mom slapped me a few times when I was a kid , its not like I turned out emotionally scarred for life or anything. Normally she did it because she was scared for me or worried and was unable to process her thoughts fast enough to put into words how she felt, I wouldn't hold that against someone.
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M / Fort Bragg, NC
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Posted 1/31/14 , edited 1/31/14
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
Posted 1/31/14
It's kinda normal in the culture I was raised in... haha...

But in reality, if parents never put any type of physical punishment on their children, wouldn't they just become more corrupt? Now, I'm not talking about all children--my girlfriend's parents never hit her once, and she's an absolute angel--but for most kids, physical punishment, be it slapping or what have you, kind of teaches them a little more about right and wrong. Now is it justified? it really depends on the viewer... The fact of the matter is, Kaga felt the humiliation and learned from her mistake, and Tada made her father ramen.

End of story =]
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23 / M / Šumeru.
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Posted 1/31/14

kokorowohiraite wrote:

In regards to this specific situation - of slapping a girl because she fell asleep at the wheel, nearly killing all the passengers present - I may not have done the same thing, but if it was my own child or my own blood who not only risked the life of others, but of herself, I would be extremely worried. We've seen similar concepts in anime time and time again, just in different situations and to varying degrees. Girls hitting, punching or play punching her love interest after he does something obscenely reckless or gets hurt protecting her. The girl was worried sick to the point it's expressed as anger, but in actuality she was worried sick. Protagonists have also been slapped when they lose themselves or sight of their path and take a turn for the worse, they get slapped and told to snap out of it so your theory on a slap helping to calm someone down may have some basis to it, however I'm sure a little studying on Google can help you find an accurate answer as what may be portrayed in anime, may not be applicable to real life and may simply be a TV show/anime cliche. Parents can also be seen aggressively grabbing their child's arm(s)/shoulders after they've done something reckless than has endangered their lives, it's because the parent(s) are insanely worried and scared. This type of scenario can be explained through neurobiology. Can you see how this could apply to the situation presented in Golden Time? It is not confined to gender, race, age or other factors and can be exhibited by various manners to varying degrees.


+1, only good post.


Excluding what I quoted:

If you're actually such a terrible, awful parent that you have to use violence to teach your child to not do/to do something, you're un-fit as a parent, however biologically inclined you are to act aggressively if your child has done something wrong. There's nothing else to say about this.

"children are spoiled nowadays"? Yeah, makes sense. Beat some sense into the little bastards, that'll teach them. You people are idiots.
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27 / M / Mor Dhona
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Posted 1/31/14
I don't see how gender matters, but...

A slap is acceptable if and only if it's to bring someone to their senses.

Sans that context, physical punishment doesn't really work in teaching children not to do things. It only teaches them their parent disapproves of it, so when alone (either as a teenager or as an adult) they probably won't listen to it. Making them feel guilty about it, that's the ticket. Trust me, I've studied enough psych to be dangerous.
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