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Where NOT to leave a female companion alone
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Posted 5/16/14
According to Beyond, a dive bar
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Posted 5/16/14

jutsuri wrote:
Very good points, I am sure you are correct about men under-reporting all kinds of violence. I just had to argue against the statement that 'men are more likely to be attacked than women at night' because I think it is false.

This is impossible to verify. So we cannot be sure. For now, instead of false, it would be more correct to say, we don't know.
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39 / Inside your compu...
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Posted 5/16/14 , edited 5/16/14

koji8123 wrote:

Leave them anywhere. I don't feel the need to white knight them. They're supposed to be 'strong' and 'independant' in this society, right? At least that's how they keep describing themselves. They don't need men to come to their rescue, so they say. So I don't see why you feel the guilt of not being there for her. If she was smart, she'd have fended off the man and the dog herself. TRUST me. Women are more aggressive and brutal than men in most cases and are the first to initiate violence in many others.

CalifCat wrote:

It is odd to me too. Just don't let her go anywhere, if you feel the need to constantly rescue her . This whole thing sounds outrageous.


I've explained how her situation is different here: http://www.crunchyroll.com/forumtopic-850297/where-not-to-leave-a-female-companion-alone?pg=3#46520757

As for the suggestions from others for treatment, I understand where you're coming from. I've had discussions of treatment with her before, but since she only very occasionally has run-ins with animals this problem is not a daily one. She does not constantly live under fear- With the exception of animals, she's a normal and happy woman. I'm not keeping treatment from her- She does not seem to see the need herself.
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21 / M / The Netherlands
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Posted 5/16/14
The desert
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36 / M
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Posted 5/16/14
nanikore2, I would agree with those recommending professional assistance. You of course can't really force someone to get help if they really don't want it, but you could encourage her gently but firmly. Were I in your shoes I would certainly be encouraging her to seek assistance.


While you are technically accurate, statistics being what they are we are able to extrapolate likely data sets. All the scenarios I have seen show that under most circumstances women are more likely to be victimized primarily because they are perceived as more attractive targets. This does not eliminate risk for men. The other important point to remember is that statistics NEVER apply to individual people or scenarios, only to populations or series of scenarios.

It would be most correct to say that the available data suggests that women are more likely to be attacked than men. Statistics never provide definite answers, only narrowed fields of uncertainty.
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Posted 5/16/14 , edited 5/16/14
I noticed you are the same one who made the Love Is thread, and so I say to you, Love is NOT suffocating.
Her phobias have now developed into you developing a phobia of being scared to leave her alone, in case she needs rescuing.
Love is letting the person you love in life "soar". Keeping them in a locked cage so no harm ever comes to them is futile. Things happen in life and she needs to learn to deal with them.
She isn't such a delicate flower as you make her out to be. You are aware she is capable of birthing a child? So I hardly think her having a splinter or being chased by a dog and over friendly men such a catastrophe.
Here are some lyrics from the main song in the movie Frozen that you talked about in your previous thread.
"It’s time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me
I’m free"
Unless you plan on keeping her locked up, things are going to happen to her, and that is life. There is a huge difference between protecting her and giving in and coddling her fears.
After all, she did manage to seek help and survive it all.

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Posted 5/16/14
Don't leave women alone with your checkbook.
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26 / M / Atlantic Beach, NC
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Posted 5/16/14
I can tell you right now, that wedding ring is not going to stop very many people. It will stop most guys with a conscious, but you have to realize that a lot of people that are just looking for some ass are going to still approach regardless of whether or not they know you are married. You can even say, "Sorry, I'm married" and they won't stop. Being in the military, it's the most depressing, pathetic, and depraved escapade at the bars after some marines leave for deployment. Literally, like the night they leave.

I've seen it way, way too many times to have faith in that barrier. If your wife is unsure of how to deal with the situation herself, you may want to talk about how she should handle it should she be approached by another person that is so pushy. Like you said, she isn't a kid anymore so babysitting her is a bit demeaning.

I'd invest in pepper spray for starters. Some people can be really, really pushy and in that situation, it would have been appropriate for her to pull it on him to defend herself.

This being said, if she is that petrified of dogs, avoid leaving her alone at any place that is dog friendly. The beach is more often than not animal friendly, where I live we don't have dog parks actually. We have the beach. That is the (unofficial) dog park. Most places you'll be fine but relaxation areas like that that attract tourists are the most likely places to have dogs.

If you are looking to avoid assholes that will hit on your wife, good fucking luck buddy. It can happen literally anywhere and at anytime, I've seen it happen at the friggin hospital for Christ's sake. It just happens, so like I said, if she is unsure of how to handle a situation where she is being harassed, talk through about what she would do. Think of a rising level of force where you start with, "No thank you" and finally progressing to pepper spraying and calling the police as he gets to assault mode.
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39 / M / Florida
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Posted 5/16/14
Considering than one of my female companions is from Shanghai and lived in New York, there's not many places that she'd be afraid to be alone.
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30 / M / Central KY.
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Posted 5/16/14
Well...If I had one...I'd keep Her by My side always.

But seriously, if there was to EVER come a "shifty" situation...I mean, I can begin to tell rather quickly when a 'scene' isn't the type that I should be a part of...And if I was able to observe a situation like this...in ANY setting...I'm going to keep Her close. I mean of course, She can DO whatever She likes...But if I sensed something was off, and She could be put in a possibly TERRIBLE situation...I'm not letting Her be on Her own by no means.

That Night come Hell or high Water, I would MAKE SURE that I got Her Home safe and sound.
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25 / M / Los Angeles,Calif...
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Posted 5/16/14

UKXD4N1ELDUDE wrote:

As for the man you refered to, I think he was just trying to be polite and comfort the woman when she was all alone.
But the dog thing I think he wasn't thinking straight and he probably then rushed after your wife to apologize and start over.


let me be devils advocate
did you ever consider that dog to be a gimmick? how else can he increase his chances of interacting with a woman
i mean maybe he is using the dog as a tool to help attract women and that way he has an advantage over the competition
just food for thought...
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22 / F / Washington
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Posted 5/16/14
As a female I don't even feel same walking by myself in the middle of the day. I've been harassed for a phone number or if I wanted to go "do something" after work several times. I hate it. I know there are feminist who say that all women need to be independent and strong but some women (such as myself) like the man to protect us some what. Because I know for a fact if my boyfriend came around the corner he would scare them off. I know I can defend for myself but I just would rather have the guy do it instead because it makes me feel more comfortable.
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28 / M / wv
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Posted 5/16/14
I thought this was some sort of joke thread, it's actually really depressing to read a lot of these stories.
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22 / F / *in his heart and...
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Posted 5/17/14
In the woods

In a parking lot

In the ocean

In a mall (I'm not sure about other females but, I am a master at getting lost)

Alone in a house after hearing a strange noise that caused that someone to leave said girl by herself

Leaving her alone with a potential psychopath

And so much more!! (Thanks horror movies!!)

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39 / Inside your compu...
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Posted 5/17/14

CalifCat wrote:

I noticed you are the same one who made the Love Is thread, and so I say to you, Love is NOT suffocating.
Her phobias have now developed into you developing a phobia of being scared to leave her alone, in case she needs rescuing.
Love is letting the person you love in life "soar". Keeping them in a locked cage so no harm ever comes to them is futile. Things happen in life and she needs to learn to deal with them.
She isn't such a delicate flower as you make her out to be. You are aware she is capable of birthing a child? So I hardly think her having a splinter or being chased by a dog and over friendly men such a catastrophe.
Here are some lyrics from the main song in the movie Frozen that you talked about in your previous thread.
"It’s time to see what I can do
To test the limits and break through
No right, no wrong, no rules for me
I’m free"
Unless you plan on keeping her locked up, things are going to happen to her, and that is life. There is a huge difference between protecting her and giving in and coddling her fears.
After all, she did manage to seek help and survive it all.



Don't worry about the smothering, because I'm usually the one who usually ends up giving up alone time in order for us to do stuff together LOL. She's the extrovert, and if it weren't for her I'd be half a shut-in with all the entertainment electronics I have at home. I learned to appreciate exploring places thanks to her.

She works out and tries to get me to work out, but I'm just lazy... Again, she's quite normal in every other way.
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