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Can you please help me?
Posted 6/19/14 , edited 6/19/14

justanotherguy_2005 wrote:

How long has it been going on? Do you think it will just go away on its own if you just ignore it long enough? If not then maybe you can inform teachers/principal of the situation to either have her moved to a different class or yourself moved in order to help avoid further interaction with her.


MadameNoir wrote:

Yeah. I'm in high school.

Tell the principal? I don't know how to word things delicately without being called "discriminative towards gay people"...Which is what she's been saying.

Thanks for your help though :)


Just say what happened and then say it is really making you uncomfortable and you would like help or suggestions to resolve the matter.


It's been going on for quite some time.

I have been ignoring her from the moment she started.

But she keeps continueing. And really, I appreciate your advice. I'll work on it (Y)
Posted 6/19/14 , edited 6/19/14
Don't a bitch about it. Been on that tip and its not a fun place to be. If you haven't tried to explain your side to her in a calm manner, not calling her stupid shit like a high school girl would, try that. If she is still being a creep, tell on her, sure you'll be a snitch, but at least you'll be a live snitch.
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Posted 6/19/14
Put aside your fears of seeming homophobic and talk to the school counselor. ASAP. Part of the counselor's job is to help handle these type of delicate situations. For the counselor to write off your case as you being discriminatory is unprofessional and can put his/her job on the line. Assume that the counselor will follow protocol and look into it. Your malevolent "friend" may be the type to run to the counselor herself and fabricate a story, so it's a good move to quickly neutralize the possibility. Also, tell your parents, friends, and whoever else may listen. You would be in a bad position if this escalates further and you have no one to vouch for you. She clearly wants to isolate you from everyone. DON'T LET HER. It's especially important to get your parents and other adults on your side, because she's least able to manipulate them. Your parents are your greatest asset in this kind of situation, because they're your home-base adults with particular insight on you. Not only can they defend your character the best, but they're also a valuable buffer between you and everyone else.
Posted 6/19/14

rockadilla wrote:

Ignore it, people will soon forget. I know it prolly seems like a big deal right now but your real friends will be there for you. And she's just hurt, and that doesn't excuse her behavior, but really there's nothing you can do if that's what she wants to do. If she is seriously harrassing you talk to a counselor, but I can almost promise ignoring her is the best option.


It's difficult right now because it's my final exams and I've got so much drama going on. Thank you I'll keep ignoring her !
Posted 6/19/14

Anticosm wrote:

High school drama. End the bitch.


Thanks
Posted 6/19/14

tretatum wrote:


MadameNoir wrote:


Yeah. I'm in high school.

Tell the principal? I don't know how to word things delicately without being called "discriminative towards gay people"...Which is what she's been saying.

Thanks for your help though :)


Yeah as long as you word so that you aren't discriminating against homosexuals I can promise that you will be ok. All you have to do is keep it pretty simple, say what happened and that you politely told this girl that you weren't interested in a relationship and now all of this has followed. Honestly as far as the rumors and stuff goes, I mean its high school that shit is gonna happen. But when you get to the violent and creepy glares that is what you can stop especially if you feel threatened. Your best bet would be to try and talk to her first though and try and resolve it at the lowest level possible. Just pull her aside and tell her that you don't have a problem with her choices, it's just that you aren't interested in it. I'm sure she can understand, seeing as the same reason she doesn't want to date men is the same reason you don't want to date women, being that you both have your preference.


I don't want to talk to her because I know that she just wants me to talk to her first in order for her to complain about how rude I've been treating her and how neglected she is feeling lately. She used to say to me "You're responsible for my happiness" and she even wants to own my friends and things like that... She's pretty scary.

She told me she loved a girl before and that girl also rejected her and how she became really vengeful.

Basically I was friends with her for a bit but then when she started getting all clingy and possessive to the fact that I couldn't even hang out with my own friends without her wanting to know where we were going or what we were doing and about every single detail of the event...... That was when I realised I hit a bomb. And was like "Holy shit. She doesn't view me as a friend but as a potential lover!"

When I ignored her in the beginning, she kept acting like a girl who got spited by her boyfriend. Whining and grunting and making weird sounds in my presence.

........ Yeah.
Posted 6/19/14

outerheaven139 wrote:


MadameNoir wrote:


outerheaven139 wrote:


MadameNoir wrote:

Well....

So I rejected a girl and her undying love for me. (I like boys. I'm straight.)
She didn't take it very nicely and started hating on me and spreading rumours.

However, although she hates me, during class she glares and starts checking me out....

It's fucking creepy.

How would you make her stop?

It's super uncomfortable.

Whenever I walk past, she's psychotically glaring at me and trying to make me notice her and when I ignore her, her eyes look my body up and down.

I feel violated.

And also, since it was in class, I couldn't really point the rude finger and shove it up her face (I wouldn't want to touch her face. It's not very good looking. Neither is it very hygienic).

Thank you. I appreciate how you spent your time reading this.



I assume you're in highschool ? tell the principal or someone there what she's doing, or just pull her aside and tell her to cut it out or you'll knock her teeth out of her mouth.


Yeah. I'm in high school.

Tell the principal? I don't know how to word things delicately without being called "discriminative towards gay people"...Which is what she's been saying.

Thanks for your help though :)


Who says you have to be delicate ? .. just tell the truth, say she pulled you aside, asked you to hook up with her, you said no, and now she's doing that out of spite, you don't need to dance around the subject and be delicate if you have nothing against you



xD Kay kay man. I'll work on it~! <3 Thanks so much for helping me !
Posted 6/19/14

melaney007 wrote:

To start off, you got to look at her as if she was a guy. Would you like a guy staring at your body. No. Well I wouldn't. So tell her that you don't. It's just another form of harassment, which is still very wrong.
In a way she's psychology manipulating you into looking at her and getting your attention. You've done a good job on ignoring her.
If rumors spread out just ignore them, it's none of their business to start with. If anyone come and asks you about the whole matter tell them to truth (About you only . Don't bitch on the girl.)
I've been kinda in the same situation. (I'm a girl and straight.) A girl fell for me also and I had to reject her later on (after 2 week that the whole class knew that she had a crush on me.) . But my girl took it in a better way than yours. I can completely understand your situation.
Girls tend to forget that even if it's a girl, it's still a person that fell in love with you. So you still have to right to tell her off (with respect) or just talk to her. Tell her how you feel about the whole matter. That she's not respecting your choice and just making you feel miserable. If she really loved you she wouldn't want you to feel that way.
With time, rumors should die down. So stay strong minded for the mean time.

Best of luck!
Melanie :3


:oo Wisdom from an experienced person!! <3 Thank you!!!
Posted 6/19/14

cancersaint69 wrote:


MadameNoir wrote:

Well....

So I rejected a girl and her undying love for me. (I like boys. I'm straight.)
She didn't take it very nicely and started hating on me and spreading rumours.

However, although she hates me, during class she glares and starts checking me out....

It's fucking creepy.

How would you make her stop?

It's super uncomfortable.

Whenever I walk past, she's psychotically glaring at me and trying to make me notice her and when I ignore her, her eyes look my body up and down.

I feel violated.

And also, since it was in class, I couldn't really point the rude finger and shove it up her face (I wouldn't want to touch her face. It's not very good looking. Neither is it very hygienic).

Thank you. I appreciate how you spent your time reading this.


It sounds like she is just mad because she got rejected and can't get at your fine self
basically she is hurt and starving for your attention ,don't give her any or else her antics will continue so best thing you can do is just ignore it
I cant think of anything better sorry


Haha You know, 99% of what everyone is telling me to do is just ignore her. So I'll go through with that! Thanks so much !!
Posted 6/19/14

x-Cellar_Door-x wrote:


Anticosm wrote:

High school drama. End the bitch.


Damned good idea right here. Plus OP, I'm sorry You have to deal with ish like that. Sigh...


Thank you! >.<
Posted 6/19/14

kokorowohiraite wrote:

Firstly, there is a pinned thread for Crunchyroll users to ask for personal advice. I'm sure a mod will eventually come by here and inform you of that.

Secondly, regardless of the situation you're experiencing at the moment, it is both unnecessary and immature to attack her on her appearance simply because she's making you feel uncomfortable - it's dragging you down to her level. Just ignore it. It's always easier said than done, but when you don't feed them attention or let them catch on that they're making you feel uncomfortable and such, then they will eventually tire and stop. As someone else mentioned, she's hurt (as anyone would be if they were rejected, including you) and with time that will wear off, and her behaviour will diminish.

As for rumours, what other people think and believe simply by word of mouth is not as important as people make it out to be. As long as the people who are important to you, such as your friends, know the truth then it's essentially irrelevant. The same thing applies here, ignoring it will help you whereas reacting to it may well fuel them or cause people to further believe them because you're making a scene over it or reacting negatively.

High school drama is nothing and you'll realize that soon enough. If it escalates to a point where you can't stand it, after a prolonged period of time, then try talking to a trusted teacher or the counselor. Everything goes away with time if left alone.


Alright I'll wait for the mod to tell me this.

I knew someone would say that "don't attack on her appearance". And thank you for your words of wisdom!~

Posted 6/19/14

Nightblade370 wrote:


MadameNoir wrote:

Well....

So I rejected a girl and her undying love for me. (I like boys. I'm straight.)
She didn't take it very nicely and started hating on me and spreading rumours.

However, although she hates me, during class she glares and starts checking me out....

It's fucking creepy.

How would you make her stop?

It's super uncomfortable.

Whenever I walk past, she's psychotically glaring at me and trying to make me notice her and when I ignore her, her eyes look my body up and down.

I feel violated.

And also, since it was in class, I couldn't really point the rude finger and shove it up her face (I wouldn't want to touch her face. It's not very good looking. Neither is it very hygienic).

Thank you. I appreciate how you spent your time reading this.


If it helps, it is not discrimination towards gay people, and if I can carry any credibility here, I come from a lesbian headed household, and so I'd know if its discrimination or not.

The best thing you can do is report to the school that you are being sexually harassed, which is a legitimate issue that the school will take seriously, no matter one's background, creed, etc and because this is sexual harassment (any form of violation, even including violation of personal space, by definition, is considered sexual harassment professionally; any teacher would tell you that). It might not seem like it at times, but teachers are trained to know what to do in situations like this and they will take appropriate measures. I would recommend telling the teacher who teaches the class you have in common with your sexual harasser so that the problem can be dealt with directly, or if you don't feel comfortable talking to them, talk to an administrator or a teacher you trust.

It is also important that you tell your parents or guardian about this as well because they would also know how to handle the situation and parents are pretty powerful in the school's eyes (your parents' taxes are paying their salaries after all; they will comply to parental requests) and also for emotional comfort because parents are meant to be there for you during times like these. Appropriate measures will be taken by adults who know and are trained to know what to do and the problem will be taken care of swiftly and directly.

And one more thing: it will be alright. It won't be made a big deal; it will not even be treated as a big deal and the school will ensure that you are safe and that the problem will disappear. Schools take sexual harassment very seriously and violation of any for of warning (assuming there are warnings) are handled with swift, decisive punishment. Your feelings are legitimate and you'll make it through this.

I hope I have helped in any way.


:oo That was a good bunch of feedback!! Thanks so much!!! <333
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Posted 6/19/14

MadameNoir wrote:


x-Cellar_Door-x wrote:


Anticosm wrote:

High school drama. End the bitch.


Damned good idea right here. Plus OP, I'm sorry You have to deal with ish like that. Sigh...


Thank you! >.<


You're more than Welcome...
Posted 6/19/14

Slaughterhose69 wrote:

Don't a bitch about it. Been on that tip and its not a fun place to be. If you haven't tried to explain your side to her in a calm manner, not calling her stupid shit like a high school girl would, try that. If she is still being a creep, tell on her, sure you'll be a snitch, but at least you'll be a live snitch.


Oh woops! I kind of bitched about her to my friends because she was really starting to make me want to slice her up and dice her. Hey dude, you're really good at guessing the mind of a high school girl.
Posted 6/19/14

aeb0717 wrote:

Put aside your fears of seeming homophobic and talk to the school counselor. ASAP. Part of the counselor's job is to help handle these type of delicate situations. For the counselor to write off your case as you being discriminatory is unprofessional and can put his/her job on the line. Assume that the counselor will follow protocol and look into it. Your malevolent "friend" may be the type to run to the counselor herself and fabricate a story, so it's a good move to quickly neutralize the possibility. Also, tell your parents, friends, and whoever else may listen. You would be in a bad position if this escalates further and you have no one to vouch for you. She clearly wants to isolate you from everyone. DON'T LET HER. It's especially important to get your parents and other adults on your side, because she's least able to manipulate them. Your parents are your greatest asset in this kind of situation, because they're your home-base adults with particular insight on you. Not only can they defend your character the best, but they're also a valuable buffer between you and everyone else.


Woah... U.U Things can get even worse than now? I'm going to go to the counsellor ASAP. Thanks for taking time to read this and for giving me advice!!!
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