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Am I required to take my friend / family's side at all times?
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24 / M
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Posted 6/24/14
no
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M / HI
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Posted 6/25/14
No you have your own opinion. Speak it
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20 / M / England.
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Posted 6/25/14
Some of my friends get offended sometimes due to me being honest, but at least I'm honest.
Posted 6/25/14
What you want and what you need, really never went beyond a story.
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24 / F / Johnstown, PA, USA
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Posted 6/25/14
No, you aren't. When people approach someone else for a discussion or opinion, much less, push their problems onto others, it's foolish of them to assume that the "victim" would provide unconditional support. Even if they're the sort who simply want someone to talk to, make it clear that you don't want to be forcibly dragged into drama. If you have to, isolate yourself from them and wait for the mess to blow over. My older sister used to use me as someone to vent to throughout our childhood. Now, I know alot of secrets that I greatly regret knowing, and, to be honest, I resent her and my weakness in allowing myself to be put in that situation. What makes it worse is her habit of deluding herself, so it's difficult to decipher fact from fiction. I learned my lesson, and I now put my foot down whenever I feel it is necessary.
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23 / M / Bolton, England
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Posted 6/25/14
If they kill someone or something then no but as sad it's up to you. I wouldn't agree on that reasoning either of them cheating, should stay out of it really
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23 / M / UK
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Posted 6/25/14 , edited 6/25/14
it could be your BFF, mum, dad, sister, brother, even your waifu. You are not required to or obligated to side with them with them at all times. However, there are times when people just want to feel they are not alone and carefully agreeing with them can make them feel better (the idea that "a problem shard is a problem halved").
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102 / Candyland
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Posted 6/25/14
You sound like you gotta start thinking for yourself.

There's nothing wrong with taking your family's side or not. It's up to you to think if's it right or wrong. If you don't think its right then don't. Even that she needs someone might be your own way of naturally giving support. Do what you think you can do and if you feel it's enough then you did your best.
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21 / M / The Void
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Posted 6/25/14
I believe it would be irresponsible for you to always take the side of anyone. If someone is wrong, they need to be told that or have to deal with the consequences. Personally, sometimes I'm contrary just to see how much someone believes in what they're saying, and how easily they can be swayed.
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54 / M / Tacoma, WA. wind...
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Posted 6/25/14 , edited 6/25/14
My aunts on my father's side are like this. They'll try and suck you into their drama. Don't misunderstand me, I do like to hear how they are doing and such but I get tired of the same crap, reworded like a William F. Buckley interview.... The same thing three times just worded differently. They've been at each other practically since they were born. The last fiasco was who among them was a better mother.... I told my aunt that her sister has no business talking about things like that since they were all bad parents. "Shocking truth!" Basically I was tired of hearing the same "old" crap and trash talking and let them know I was tired of it. My brother would be more tactful and change the subject or at least tell them he wanted to talk about something else.... They'd still get pissed off, if they were "in a mood."

You are not required to take sides and sometimes you will piss all parties off.

Sometimes the best way to build bridges is to burn the old ones down.
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19
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Posted 6/29/14 , edited 6/29/14
I guess for me, it depends on the situation. If it's no biggie, I usually tend to take their side. My family can be rather intense. But if they say something or act upon something that goes against my values or can potentially hurt someone/something, then I will speak my mind. I don't care how close I am with them. I'm independent, and often think far differently then they do.
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23 / M
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Posted 6/29/14
No, it's okay not to side with them.

Just be polite.

Don't burn bridges either. She's just expressing herself, but let her know if she's going too far.
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31 / M / Hemet, California
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Posted 6/29/14
Put simply. Fuck no.. Think of yourself and carefully chose which battles to get involved in. Just cause two people are close don't mean one person is obligated to always side with the other.
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23 / M
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Posted 6/30/14

you either state your opinion or change the conversation
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30 / M / Central KY.
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Posted 6/30/14

Sogno- wrote:

nope, you're not required. just because you're connected by blood doesn't mean you're connected by mind.


This, right here.

Don't let their problems get You down, Rin! <3
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