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The best joke/comeback you can think of
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F / California
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Posted 10/10/14
I've always been partial to responding to "excuse me?" with... "There's no excuse for YOU."
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31 / M / Waterloo, Ontario
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Posted 10/10/14
You mad bro. lol
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21 / M / Magical World
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Posted 7/4/15 , edited 12/1/15
Parents: "You need to stop watching TV, and read more!"
Me: *turns on subtitles*
Posted 7/4/15
Be quiet cabbage
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30 / M
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Posted 7/4/15

Rohzek wrote:

Whenever someone tries to combat my "your mom" with "My mom's dead," I simply say one of the following:

1.) That's right! Because I fucked her to death!

2.) Damn dude, I know she was walking funny when I left last night, but that's extreme.


Except some people actually have dead mothers and it bothers them a lot. My former landlord's grandson was like this. He got into numerous fights over people saying things about his mom. So... when someone beats the tar out of you for it, one day... don't be terribly surprised.
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21 / M
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Posted 7/4/15
"No, you!"
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(´◔౪◔)✂❤
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Posted 7/4/15
i know you are but what am i?
Posted 7/5/15
I'm sorry please I didn't mean it I'll do anything please just come back.
Posted 7/5/15
Ugh, give it a rest
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Posted 7/5/15
Telling someone to have a "nice day" after they finished yelling at you for no reason or acted like a complete asshole. This is very affective especially when its a retail job with a disgruntled customer.
Ejanss 
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Posted 7/5/15

IsuzuSento wrote:

Parents: "You need to stop watching TV, and read more!"
Me: *turns on subtitles*


Wow, those nine months you've spent in the cryogenic freezing chamber since October '14 haven't.....done much for the raconteur sense of humor, have they?
MaRtYz 
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28 / M / Australia, Melbourne
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Posted 7/9/15
My jokes/comebacks come out of no where randomly. One time my brother and his partner were having a bit of an argument while I was over. I can't remember what it was about but my brother towards the end of the argument says, "I'll go see my other girlfriend" to which I respond, "Oh, what's his name!?". Everyone literally almost pissed their pants, no one was expecting it. Glad to have lightened the mood haha!
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F
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Posted 8/24/15
Bring out the big guns! The C word. Usually works and I love it.
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17 / M / U.A Highschool
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Posted 8/24/15
Mine are pretty mean but they fit too the situation
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M / Unova Region
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Posted 8/24/15
"DEEZ NUTS! HAH! GOT EM!"
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