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Post Reply Would you consider yourself jaded and/or cynical?
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22 / M / Brooklyn, NY
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Posted 8/25/14
The other day during staff meal where I work, I was sitting with some co-workers. One co-worker in particular was ranting about somebody he'd been seeing, and speaking quite vulgarly about her because she went to Greece with her boyfriend (mind you, she was cheating on her boyfriend with my co-worker).

Not only did I make some obvious points to my co-worker (or not so obvious depending on the person), but I had told him that it might be best for him to destroy his interest in people, or at least his romantic interest, A fellow co-worker chimed in and agreed with me. We proceeded to tell him that he should stop seeking out romance with people, and just let it happen whenever it happens, because if people are interested in you they'll come to you, and not to force yourself into anybody else's life.

tl;dr - a co-worker told me my view on people is too jaded for my age. Do you guys consider yourself jaded or cynical when it comes to people?

Note - my co-worker who goes on these rants is 37, I'm 22. Go figure.
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Bottle Black
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Posted 8/25/14
Cynical with hope haha.
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26 / M / Sydney, Australia
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Posted 8/25/14 , edited 8/25/14
Doesn't seem jaded. Personally also believe it's best to let it happen.

(After hundred times of trying, I've finally given up... I'm not a quitter but sometimes you can't have everything)
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22 / M / Brooklyn, NY
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Posted 8/25/14

GayAsianBoy wrote:

Doesn't seem jaded. Personally also believe it's best to let it happen.

(After hundred times of trying, I've finally given up... I'm not a quitter but sometimes you can't have everything)


I've never been able to understand how in my experience, it was when I put in the least amount of effort (And in some cases being sleazy myself) I've had the best, most fulfilling experiences, be they in a relationship or otherwise. And yet when I put in effort, I find the outcome to be negative for everyone involved.

But hey, you can't always get what you want right?
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20 / M / Illinois
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Posted 8/25/14 , edited 8/25/14
I am far too tired of people for someone my age, and I'm quite worried for myself, really. I don't pursue interpersonal relations of any depth or sincerity, and I'm quickly getting used to being alone. I still react negatively to long-term solitude, however, as I remember getting anxiety during the end of the summer months that mysteriously dissipated upon returning to high school and chatting with peers.

I think I avoid people because I don't think I have anything to share with other people that they would actually want. I've a lot of shameful memories of past relationships where I feel I've humiliated myself; it's created a fear of misrepresenting myself, and even uncertainty about who I really am (the me I think I am, or the me others view me as). Such confusion is a chasm of a schism between yourself and others.

That mentality, I'd say, characterizes me as a cynic or jaded person, albeit a young one who has a lot of growing up to do. They say you go through a lot of emotional maturity during your 20's, after all, and a large part of that is learning about yourself and others.

I'd like to think that maturity isn't about how you act, it's about how you think of yourself and other people.
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Posted 8/25/14 , edited 8/26/14
For a long time I've found myself annoyed by...pretty much everyone. I can't stand very many people at all. It's not a good thing.
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26 / M / Sydney, Australia
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Posted 8/25/14

SunkistElemental wrote:


GayAsianBoy wrote:

Doesn't seem jaded. Personally also believe it's best to let it happen.

(After hundred times of trying, I've finally given up... I'm not a quitter but sometimes you can't have everything)


I've never been able to understand how in my experience, it was when I put in the least amount of effort (And in some cases being sleazy myself) I've had the best, most fulfilling experiences, be they in a relationship or otherwise. And yet when I put in effort, I find the outcome to be negative for everyone involved.

But hey, you can't always get what you want right?


I've read about a research where it says if you expect less out of life, you are more likely to be happier.

Which I found to be so true. It doesn't mean you're jaded or cynical, if you have a humble outlook on life, and things go better than expected, it's more satisfying than expecting a lot out of life and getting nothing.
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22 / M / Brooklyn, NY
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Posted 8/25/14

Fanboyish wrote:

I am far too tired of people for someone my age, and I'm quite worried for myself, really. I don't pursue interpersonal relations of any depth or sincerity, and I'm quickly getting used to being alone. I still react negatively to long-term solitude, however, as I remember getting anxiety during the end of the summer months that mysteriously dissipated upon returning to high school and chatting with peers.

I think I avoid people because I don't think I have anything to share with other people that they would actually want. I've a lot of shameful memories of past relationships where I feel I've humiliated myself; it's created a fear of misrepresenting myself, and even uncertainty about who I really am (the me I think I am, or the me others view me as). Such confusion is a chasm of a schism between yourself and others.

That mentality, I'd say, characterizes me as a cynic or jaded person, albeit a young one who has a lot of growing up to do. They say you go through a lot of emotional maturity during your 20's, after all, and a large part of that is learning about yourself and others.

I'd like to think that maturity isn't about how you act, it's about how you think of yourself and other people.


Given your motive, I don't think it's you being a cynic at all. .I'm not much older then you and I still find myself wondering who I am most of the time. I guess it's just part of the maturing process.




RingsAroundUranus wrote:

For a long time I've found myself annoyed by...pretty much everyone. I can't stand very many people at all. It's not a good thing.


I find myself saying this quite frequently, which is why I choose to work 6 days a week and generally avoid people with the exception of my co-workers. Even when I go out to sit at a bar I usually end up staying alone.

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Posted 8/25/14
I don't seem THAT cynical or jaded. Wish I could be.
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22 / M / Brooklyn, NY
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Posted 8/25/14

MadameNoir wrote:

I don't seem THAT cynical or jaded. Wish I could be.


To seem that cycnical, or to actually be that cynical? It definitely helps alleviate a certain degree from stress on your life, but it also exacerbates the thought of everything sucking a bit more.
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Posted 8/25/14

SunkistElemental wrote:


MadameNoir wrote:

I don't seem THAT cynical or jaded. Wish I could be.


To seem that cycnical, or to actually be that cynical? It definitely helps alleviate a certain degree from stress on your life, but it also exacerbates the thought of everything sucking a bit more.


Seriously? I'd rather seem cynical or be cynical. Either one would be lovely.

I know right.... The cynical people I know seem to get to enjoy life more. They're more grounded.
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22 / M / Brooklyn, NY
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Posted 8/25/14
It's a tedious difference to note, but there are definitely cynics out there who don't seem cynical but they're some of the most realistic (if not completely negative) people you could meet, and then there are those who come off as completely jaded, but in actuality aren't.

Cynics are definitely more grounded though. They don't have to worry about being disappointed in anybody or anything because chances are they saw it coming from a mile away.
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20 / M / Illinois
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Posted 8/25/14 , edited 8/25/14
When a cynic enjoys something, it's an honest and heartfelt enjoyment...usually. That's the attraction; they can be very genuine people.
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25 / M / Errr Manor
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Posted 8/25/14

Fanboyish wrote:

I am far too tired of people for someone my age, and I'm quite worried for myself, really. I don't pursue interpersonal relations of any depth or sincerity, and I'm quickly getting used to being alone. I still react negatively to long-term solitude, however, as I remember getting anxiety during the end of the summer months that mysteriously dissipated upon returning to high school and chatting with peers.

I think I avoid people because I don't think I have anything to share with other people that they would actually want. I've a lot of shameful memories of past relationships where I feel I've humiliated myself; it's created a fear of misrepresenting myself, and even uncertainty about who I really am (the me I think I am, or the me others view me as). Such confusion is a chasm of a schism between yourself and others.

That mentality, I'd say, characterizes me as a cynic or jaded person, albeit a young one who has a lot of growing up to do. They say you go through a lot of emotional maturity during your 20's, after all, and a large part of that is learning about yourself and others.

I'd like to think that maturity isn't about how you act, it's about how you think of yourself and other people.


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28 / M / Presumed Dead
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Posted 8/25/14
Actually Yes...Quite a bit. But, then again, My Education keeps Me 'grounded', so I have so time to think of what could or could not have been.
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