So I made a story......2
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Posted 9/11/14 , edited 9/11/14
This time, it's a Sci-Fi story going under the working title, EarthBreak (most likely going to change).

In this world, the knowledge of dimensions and dimensional travel is as old as basic physics, since, dimension travelers from a more advanced dimension (dimension B ) actually aided humanity from dimension A in developing their knowledge on gravity, electromagnetism e.t.c.

Centuries later, due to reasons left out, military units from dimension B invade earth in dimension A and wipe out most of their advance defenses as the military in dimension A are no match for them

While the military advance (while despair continues), they are met by another military unit from their own dimension. A much stronger military unit of an empire. They begin to battle with each other for the right to colonize earth and annihilate the hopeless humans.

After days of battle, another military unit arrives, this time, it's the largest empire's unit in dimension B. The other two military units are much weaker than this new military .

However, the new unit, has their leader announce to all that while they plan to colonize earth, they are ready to give the most useful humans of dimension A the chance to live in this utopia that they are planning.

The MC of the story, (through reasons that I'll leave out) is recruited to this great empire's army. he plans to take over their military from the inside. Will things work out for him?


The story is in post-concept stage and I know that It can be developed more but what thoughts do you have on it's premise?

Please feel free to leave some criticism and don't be lazy to write whatever you want.
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Posted 9/11/14 , edited 9/15/14
You wrote a story?

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21 / M / Shiganshina District
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Posted 9/12/14

Phersu wrote:

You wrote a story?



Yeah, thanks! Could you give me some critical analysis though. I wrote this in order to understand how someone else would see my story.
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21 / M / Mexico
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Posted 9/15/14
I just can tell you that I have noticed all people wanna make stories about war, especially about human extinction, can you make something more original?
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Posted 12/23/15
"Year-end cleanup. Closing threads with no activity since 2014."
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