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Do you sometimes feel alone even though you have friends?
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29 / M
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Posted 11/2/14 , edited 11/2/14
Friends are tough for me to come by because I'm not interested in cars, clothes, movies, parties, holidays, money, food, I don't know, what does the world like? So when meeting somebody, I need somebody else who knows me to introduce me, because otherwise I just stay mostly silent and relay what I've heard other people say on the subject, like some sort of rain-man. But people don't do introductions.

I am interested in doing two things with other people; getting stuff done and coming to conclusions on troubling matters.

This makes me come across as a bored, frustrated bore. Especially when somebody asks me a question about things I don't care about, or spends too much time making sure I'm ok with plans that I don't care about any details beyond when I need to be there. And I've suffered many lonely nights where I choose to stand on the outside of the group, because I can't participate in a conversation about which motorcycles look the coolest or which basketball team is screwing up their roster. These are nights when the conversation will never turn to philosophy or morality or the practicality of a life-goal, because these are all tedious and pointless conversations for the majority of people. And people think that I don't like them or want them around, or worse, that I really have nothing to say. Which brings them down due to a misunderstanding of my personality. Which brings me down because I feel like I've set off a cycle of misunderstanding that I can't break without sounding totally insane.

I still appreciate them as people, but my best friends are the people I can get stuff done with, even if most of our time is spent silently.
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25 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 11/2/14

Aurasphinxiar wrote:

Twas' just a jest, I jest.


Okay.
Sogno- 
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Posted 11/2/14
yes , all these people are all like "we love you" and like to give me hugs and i'm all "i'm all alone no one cares" lol well that's just how it is sometimes
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16 / F / Connecticut
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Posted 11/2/14
Sometimes. The thing about me is that I've finally gained a good amount of friends, but I only trust a few with the serious stuff. So sometimes I just shut down, and shut everyone out because I can't understand myself, and don't want to bother other people with it.
Posted 11/2/14

qualeshia3 wrote:

For some reason, I still feel alone even though I have a good friend.


Loneliness has nothing to do with if you have a friend or not.
If you're lonely then you're lonely, maybe having one good friend isn't enough to fill the void.
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23 / M / AZ
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Posted 11/2/14
In high school I had friends but I never hanged out with them after school
They did so much stupid stuff that it killed one of them
Posted 11/2/14
for me it's a protective barrier.
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20 / M / CA
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Posted 11/2/14
I have the wrong friends, they are all very studious and anti social.
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25 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 11/2/14

devouringdragons wrote:


qualeshia3 wrote:

For some reason, I still feel alone even though I have a good friend.


Loneliness has nothing to do with if you have a friend or not.
If you're lonely then you're lonely, maybe having one good friend isn't enough to fill the void.


Probably.
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21 / M / Florida
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Posted 11/2/14
I feel accompanied even though I don't have any friends.
Posted 11/2/14
I used to, but not anymore.

You just need to have a better relationship with yourself, that's all. From my experience, I was lonely not because I needed people around but because I couldn't stand being in my own company for long periods of time.

Don't worry, you'll work it out eventually.
Posted 11/2/14 , edited 11/2/14
just think of it this way.

all the loneliness I've faced in life prepares me for something greater. and strengthen my mind and teaches me to be independent.
____________

I've never been the outgoing type, always had trouble making friends. and never been asked out by ANYONE, male or female. there were key moments in my life that made me feel really lonely...:

1. when this girl invited everyone to her party except me.
2. when I got dumped by my dates
3. when I got verbally harassed at work

these all happened before 2014. so I felt really lonely during those times. I always thought to myself, "I would like someone to come home to to cry in his arms, or to hug etc etc"... it's not really about being desperate, it's more like... what I needed emotionally at that time. But real life is not like in anime, knights in shining armours don't really appear out of the blue.


So I had to live through all of that by myself. I just didn't feel comfortable talking about my loneliness with friends or families. I felt like... I needed someone more romantically linked... someone I can confide in... like a boyfriend or something.

_________________

Anyway, I managed to get through all of that by myself. I did it by strengthening my mind, and finding new inspirations in life. All these loneliness prepares me for the future. To live by myself and to not rely on someone else to heal me.


I want to immigrate to Japan soon. And I feel like I can do it because I feel like nothing can make me feel lonely anymore... if the people there treat me badly, I can stand up for myself now, and I won't feel alone.


You can either keep moping about feeling lonely, or you can pick yourself up and turn a negative emotion into a positive learning experience.

________________


I don't know what's up with me lately, I sound like a shrink more and more.
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25 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 11/2/14

anikevin wrote:

I feel accompanied even though I don't have any friends.


Really.
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21 / M / Tiphares
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Posted 11/2/14
Yes.
Posted 11/2/14
I don't have any friends, so I'm always alone.
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25 / M / Fredericton, NB
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Posted 11/2/14 , edited 11/2/14
I have a few good friends but most of them aren't the ones that I would talk about feelings, life, and so forth.

Sometimes, I feel like there is no one to turn to, fpr example, like GayAsianBoy pointed out when (1)' Everyone invited to the party except me,' you really fall to your lowest point. This actually happened once recently; I felt like giving up on school. It was really a dire moment, and not having someone to confide in, really hurts.
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