First  Prev  1  2  3  4  Next  Last
A rare case of escaping the friend zone
4551 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
21 / M / Canada eh
Offline
Posted 11/28/14 , edited 11/28/14
Long story short, I escaped the friend zone and got the girl of my dreams



Anyone here currently in the friend zone? Trying to escape it? Already escaped it? Or just moving on?

Here's the story, I'll try my best to keep it short.

And please bear with me, it might get a little cheesy and dramatic =.="

It felt like a plot that came out of your typical romance movie. I'm your typical football jockey playing college football and she's the ordinary smart girl. So we meet through a friend at her birthday party. I added her on facebook and sent her a message. We end up talking for a long time. Fast forward a few months, I start developing feelings for her, she's nice, optimistic, great sense of humor, good morals. She would always reply whenever I sent her a text, a message on facebook or a snapchat. And every time, she would always be happy. Now she's just a normal girl to anyone else's eyes, nothing really stands out with her. But it was her personality that really got me hooked, then I started noticing things that made her beautiful in her own way, like her smile and the way she laughed.

So her being there every time I contacted her and her being optimistic all the time, I assumed she had the same feelings for me. So I just kept on doing what I did. Fast forward a few months again, we were video calling one night. Everything was going fine, just talking about random things. Then she said,"I need to ask you something." My chest tightened up because I already knew what she was gonna ask. She goes on to say,"What do you think of me? Do you think of me as just a close friend.....or more? Because lately, I've been getting the feeling that you think of me as more than a friend. At first, I just thought you were treating me as a close friend, but my friends told me differently. So is it true? That you have some feelings for me?"

I didn't answer her. I was too nervous and I just couldn't find the words. The tension was too high. This went on for quite some time, she just kept on trying to get me to answer. "The quietness is killing me Mark.." Finally, I was able to say some words, "You don't have to say it, I already know what you're gonna say. I understand. Don't worry about it." At that point, everything that happened between us just flashed in my head and I was slowly breaking down. I tilted the camera so she could only see my chest, but it didn't change the fact that she could hear me breaking down. I was trying my best not to let her hear me, but it was no use. "Mark, why are you crying? Are you ok?" She looked so worried when she asked me that.

I don't know how, but I managed to say words. "Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about me." She looked down and tilted her camera up so I can only see her ceiling. I started hearing her cry as well. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt her, I thought to myself, "why are you crying? You did nothing wrong." It went on for hours. She said, "I'm so sorry for hurting you.." I just kept saying, "Don't worry about it, you don't have to apologize." I don't know it happened, but my closest friend called me . He was out drinking with my other close friends. He was wondering what I was doing and if I was just okay. I just broke down on the phone and he said, "Alright man, just sit tight, we're coming to pick you up."

I told her that my friends are coming to pick me up to go get drinks, so we just hung up. They picked me up and went back to my friends' house. They obviously knew that something was wrong with me and they gave me drinks without saying a word. I got pretty friggin' drunk. She texted me later that night saying, "Mark, I really don't want to lose you, I still want to be close as we were...it hurts me knowing that I've caused you so much pain. And I'm sincerely sorry for that, I just feel so awful and horrible. Please don't drink too much." It was already too late for that because I was already piss drunk. I ended up telling my friends everything what happened, after that I just passed out.

Next morning, my friends told me that everything I told them will stay only between the three of us. They told me, "Don't change man, keep doing what you do. Judging from last night, you must really really like this girl. Keep going after her and don't let go." At the time, I took it in as just words of comfort, but I listened to what they said. A few days passed by, I was still texting her, told her everything was slowly getting better. We were still close, but I couldn't help thinking that everything will never be the same again, and I'm sure she felt the same way. Sooner or later, that night became a thing of the past.

Fast forward again a month, we actually became closer, we were more open with each other. It doesn't make sense, but we just were. We were talking on the phone at 3am in the morning. I was half awake and I brought up the night everything happened. I told her a lot of things, "I care about you a lot. I hope you know that I would've taken really good care of you, I'd always be by your side. I wouldn't go anywhere. Yeah, I got hurt pretty bad that night, but that didn't stop me. I still think about what we could be. All those scenarios with you I dream about, I hope that they can happen. Every time I talk to you, I always hope, that maybe, JUST maybe, I'd be able to reach you." Things were silent for a bit, then she spoke, "I think you did..maybe those scenarios you think of will happen. When I heard you cry that night, it hurt me so much because it made me realize how much you cared for me. And after everything that happened, you never changed, you were still the same, you kept talking to me. Your heart is so strong and I admire that."

I'll probably just leave it there because things get a bit too personal from there

I guess I failed to keep it short, but that's the story
20192 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
21 / M / The Heroes Associ...
Offline
Posted 11/28/14


congratulations!

Escaped it twice myself, broke up with them after i realized they were alot more annoying than i thought they were xD
4243 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
F / Smash Bros Mansion
Offline
Posted 11/28/14
I confessed to my newfound friend over the summer about a year or two ago and he returned my feelings. ^^
Posted 11/28/14 , edited 11/28/14
I don't believe there's a such thing as the friendzone. Either they like you a certain way or not, and there's no middle ground. It's not a thing, to me at least.


I met a girl a while ago, and after a while it became clear she had no intention of ever dating me so I just walked away from it and really did not care. Big deal I guess. Life's too short to live in the gray.

Posted 11/28/14 , edited 11/28/14
I wouldn't trust someone who keeps me hanging on to a string until they feel like giving me a chance. I am not the next best thing nor am I some form of back-up to be used only when necessary. BUT... That's just me.

If you're happy, then congratulations to you. I hope it was worth your trouble. (I mean that with sincerity. I hope it works out for you.)
48208 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
26 / M / USA
Offline
Posted 11/28/14
Lets hear this story.
18772 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
19 / M / I don't know??
Offline
Posted 11/28/14
Congrats dude. Now is my turn wish me luck.
29739 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
22 / M / Fraxinus
Offline
Posted 11/28/14
I tried. I legitimately tried to type out in a respectful manner why the term 'friendzone' was ridiculous, but I can't do it without coming across as harsh. I just hate the term that much.

Men, women are not obligated to go out with you just because you know them, or are friends with them... Jesus...
18904 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
24 / M
Offline
Posted 11/28/14 , edited 11/28/14

xDeadlyDollx wrote:

I wouldn't trust someone who keeps me hanging on to a string until they feel like giving me a chance. I am not the next best thing nor am I some form of back-up to be used only when necessary. BUT... That's just me.

If you're happy, then congratulations to you. I hope it was worth your trouble. (I mean that with sincerity. I hope it works out for you.)


completely agree.
9376 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
28 / M / San Antonio
Offline
Posted 11/28/14
Hope it's everything you wanted it to be. I wouldn't know. I've never really been in the friend zone. But apparently it's a big problem according to the internet.
Dragon
58342 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
37 / M
Online
Posted 11/28/14
Sorry, I don't believe in any such thing as the "friend zone". It's generally used as a way to say "but I'm so nice! Why won't she go out with meeeee??!?"

If you started dating a friend, that's fantastic - I personally won't date anyone I'm not already friends with, specifically because a) it means we already share at least something in common, and b) I couldn't imagine a life partner I wasn't more than friends with.

In general, my advice is - just try to be friends. Maybe it'll lead to more (apparently in this case), maybe not. But don't be a friend hoping/expecting it'll lead to more, because that's friendship with a demand.. that is, not a real friendship. If she can't trust you to just be a friend, why in the world would you think she might trust you to be more?
599 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
26 / M / Connecticut
Offline
Posted 11/28/14

AzazelOfNexium wrote:



congratulations!

Escaped it twice myself, broke up with them after i realized they were alot more annoying than i thought they were xD


That made my day
4551 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
21 / M / Canada eh
Offline
Posted 11/28/14 , edited 11/28/14

ShaneK1990 wrote:

Lets hear this story.


I'll try my best to keep it short.

And please bear with me, it might get a little cheesy and dramatic =.="

It felt like a plot that came out of your typical romance movie. I'm your typical football jockey playing college football and she's the ordinary smart girl. So we meet through a friend at her birthday party. I added her on facebook and sent her a message. We end up talking for a long time. Fast forward a few months, I start developing feelings for her, she's nice, optimistic, great sense of humor, good morals. She would always reply whenever I sent her a text, a message on facebook or a snapchat. And every time, she would always be happy. Now she's just a normal girl to anyone else's eyes, nothing really stands out with her. But it was her personality that really got me hooked, then I started noticing things that made her beautiful in her own way, like her smile and the way she laughed.

So her being there every time I contacted her and her being optimistic all the time, I assumed she had the same feelings for me. So I just kept on doing what I did. Fast forward a few months again, we were video calling one night. Everything was going fine, just talking about random things. Then she said,"I need to ask you something." My chest tightened up because I already knew what she was gonna ask. She goes on to say,"What do you think of me? Do you think of me as just a close friend.....or more? Because lately, I've been getting the feeling that you think of me as more than a friend. At first, I just thought you were treating me as a close friend, but my friends told me differently. So is it true? That you have some feelings for me?"

I didn't answer her. I was too nervous and I just couldn't find the words. The tension was too high. This went on for quite some time, she just kept on trying to get me to answer. "The quietness is killing me Mark.." Finally, I was able to say some words, "You don't have to say it, I already know what you're gonna say. I understand. Don't worry about it." At that point, everything that happened between us just flashed in my head and I was slowly breaking down. I tilted the camera so she could only see my chest, but it didn't change the fact that she could hear me breaking down. I was trying my best not to let her hear me, but it was no use. "Mark, why are you crying? Are you ok?" She looked so worried when she asked me that.

I don't know how, but I managed to say words. "Yeah, I'm fine. Don't worry about me." She looked down and tilted her camera up so I can only see her ceiling. I started hearing her cry as well. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt her, I thought to myself, "why are you crying? You did nothing wrong." It went on for hours. She said, "I'm so sorry for hurting you.." I just kept saying, "Don't worry about it, you don't have to apologize." I don't know it happened, but my closest friend called me . He was out drinking with my other close friends. He was wondering what I was doing and if I was just okay. I just broke down on the phone and he said, "Alright man, just sit tight, we're coming to pick you up."

I told her that my friends are coming to pick me up to go get drinks, so we just hung up. They picked me up and went back to my friends' house. They obviously knew that something was wrong with me and they gave me drinks without saying a word. I got pretty friggin' drunk. She texted me later that night saying, "Mark, I really don't want to lose you, I still want to be close as we were...it hurts me knowing that I've caused you so much pain. And I'm sincerely sorry for that, I just feel so awful and horrible. Please don't drink too much." It was already too late for that because I was already piss drunk. I ended up telling my friends everything what happened, after that I just passed out.

Next morning, my friends told me that everything I told them will stay only between the three of us. They told me, "Don't change man, keep doing what you do. Judging from last night, you must really really like this girl. Keep going after her and don't let go." At the time, I took it in as just words of comfort, but I listened to what they said. A few days passed by, I was still texting her, told her everything was slowly getting better. We were still close, but I couldn't help thinking that everything will never be the same again, and I'm sure she felt the same way. Sooner or later, that night became a thing of the past.

Fast forward again a month, we actually became closer, we were more open with each other. It doesn't make sense, but we just were. We were talking on the phone at 3am in the morning. I was half awake and I brought up the night everything happened. I told her a lot of things, "I care about you a lot. I hope you know that I would've taken really good care of you, I'd always be by your side. I wouldn't go anywhere. Yeah, I got hurt pretty bad that night, but that didn't stop me. I still think about what we could be. All those scenarios with you I dream about, I hope that they can happen. Every time I talk to you, I always hope, that maybe, JUST maybe, I'd be able to reach you." Things were silent for a bit, then she spoke, "I think you did..maybe those scenarios you think of will happen. When I heard you cry that night, it hurt me so much because it made me realize how much you cared for me. And after everything that happened, you never changed, you were still the same, you kept talking to me. Your heart is so strong and I admire that."

I'll probably just leave it there because things get a bit too personal from there

I guess I failed to keep it short, but that's the story :)

4071 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
30
Offline
Posted 11/28/14

SuzumeAkihana wrote:

I confessed to my newfound friend over the summer about a year or two ago and he returned my feelings. ^^


Sorry but the friend zone doesn't exist for girls to be in. You never got out, because you were never in it.
14468 cr points
Send Message: Send PM GB Post
26 / M / Houma
Offline
Posted 11/28/14 , edited 11/28/14
As someone who has banished some people into it I can attest the friendzone does exist but I will also say that isn't always a bad thing. It serves as a real test of character and helps build trust.

Anyway... the friendzone isn't hopeless... it is the redzone and you have to be careful not to turn it over before you get to the endzone and if you fall short settle for the FG. You never know what the future could bring.

Failure sucks but if you really can't bother to maintain a friendship with the person without feeling entitled then it probably wasn't going to work out anyway. Don't go burning any bridges.

Congrats to Mark, as for myself my social circle (outside of the internet) is limited to family, work, and a few old friends so there really aren't any options. I do have someone in my friendzone but she has yet to show any consistency and I feel in the long run our personalities would clash too much. I do make my issues clear though as I believe in giving people the opportunity to explore change.

(Maybe I'm just weird like that? Yes, that's probably it...)
First  Prev  1  2  3  4  Next  Last
You must be logged in to post.