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"Upgrading English" - English v. 2
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29 / F
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Posted 6/29/07
http://www.foon.co.uk/rc/page/e2.htm

Taken via the site featured above:

Excerpt:


First of all, question marks should be deleted. They're just silly. You know when it's a question. You just know. The question mark character, however, should be kept because it looks funny when you put it by itself on things like signs and hats.

Additionally, anyone writing a question now not only has to delete the question mark, but replace it with the word "PANG" (see fig. 1) because it looks funny. It also makes it more irritating to write, so hopefully people won't ask as many questions and the world will be a happier place.



But, I hear you ask, what are those funny symbols above the text? Well, my response to you is this:

"It's 'Above the text PANG', damnit!"

But I'll let you off seeing as it's Monday. These funny symbols are, for your information, eyebrow punctuation. This helps you read things properly by telling you what to do with your eyebrows as you say the words. For example:



... (read more at website)


I can almost hear the brains going 'Yeah, I need this. This is all very exciting.'
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31 / M / Iloilo City, PH
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Posted 6/29/07
whatever this guy's smoking... it ain't weed...
Posted 6/29/07
Haha, well that was entertaining. Person who wrote that has a little too much time on their hands. I kinda liked the idea with pictures in the words :P, though it would make writing essays more of a pain than they already are.
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30 / M / Melbourne
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Posted 6/29/07
Posted 6/29/07
"Why do I stay high? Why do I stay high?" ~~ Bone Thugs N' Harmony

The guy might be taking some weed. Or his OCD is just kicking in. =P

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26 / M / Body in NY Mind i...
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Posted 6/29/07
_ _ -----oo------oo- ---- --- oo----- -- ----- oooo ---- ooo ----- ---- --------- _ _ _ _ _ -==--=
I`m not sure drugs are the cause of this. What the F**k was this person thinking PANG (i`m definitely not confident thats how it goes PANG

[edit] now I see It didnt stand out before. This is very clever I must admit a genius at work. It displays expressions very nice. Well I have no questions on this.
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22 / F / the square
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Posted 6/29/07
that's kool and retarded all at the same time
especially the eyebrow thing
Posted 6/29/07
It's almost as ridiculous as Mark Twain's Spelling Reform;

A Plan for the Improvement of English Spelling

For example, in Year 1 that useless letter c would be dropped to be replased either by k or s, and likewise x would no longer be part of the alphabet. The only kase in which c would be retained would be the ch formation, which will be dealt with later.

Year 2 might reform spelling, so that which and one would take the same konsonant, wile Year 3 might well abolish y replasing it with i and Iear 4 might fiks the g/j anomali wonse and for all.

Jenerally, then, the improvement would kontinue iear bai iear with Iear 5 doing awai with useless double konsonants, and Iears 6-12 or so modifaiing vowlz and the rimeining voist and unvoist konsonants.

Bai Iear 15 or sou, it wud fainali bi posibl tu meik ius ov thi ridandant letez c, y and x -- bai now jast a memori in the maindz ov ould doderez -- tu riplais ch, sh, and th rispektivli.

Fainali, xen, aafte sam 20 iers ov orxogrefkl riform, wi wud hev a lojikl, kohirnt speling in ius xrewawt xe Ingliy-spiking werld.

Mark Twain
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28 / M / secret
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Posted 6/29/07
i think you need to see a shrink!
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27 / M / ......
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Posted 6/29/07
BUAHAHAHAHHAHA!!!
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29 / M / Japan
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Posted 6/29/07
It's like a parody of George Orwell's "Quick Speak" from the novel 1986...
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23 / M / Palm Beach, Florida
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Posted 6/29/07
That was simply stupid
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29 / M / US
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Posted 6/29/07
funny...as intended.




"It's like a parody of George Orwell's "Quick Speak" from the novel 1986.." T_T
Posted 6/29/07
I just lmaoed.
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21 / M / US
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Posted 7/5/10
dammit the link doesn't work anymore...
this seemed interesting T_T
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