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now until the rest of your life
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24 / M / Canada
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Posted 12/27/14
At the end of a semester, from the point I've finished my finals to the point I've received my grades for them, all I can think about is "oh god, whats my plan, what if I don't pass, what else will I have for my life, could I possibly get a job there? Build my way up, oh god..." and a lot more ridiculous stuff.
Posted 12/27/14
Possibly. I've come to the realization that somethings will just not happen in my life. The future is pretty bleak for me. I try not to think about it lol
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18 / M / Scotland
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Posted 12/27/14 , edited 12/27/14
Every single day is constant contemplation for me :/

But I'm pretty young, so I have plenty of time to fuck everything up.
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F / Edo
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Posted 12/27/14
Yeah I have been feeling that ways for months now...
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20 / M / Illinois
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Posted 12/27/14
Huh, my problem is kind of the reverse. I have a good idea of where I'll be in ten years, or at least where I'd like to be, but no idea where I'll be in two years. I'm about to graduate from highschool, and although I've decided on my major, I have yet to make any final decisions on my college. It's only the near future that makes me anxious.
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23 / M / Norway
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Posted 12/27/14
Yeah i do think about what i want to do alot, but i still have no idea, and i'm 20 so it's getting pretty bad.

Right now, i'm trying to find my passion, rather than thinking about what i'll be doing for a living. Hopefully that passion can one day outweigh a job i dislike.
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21 / M / Yoshi City
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Posted 12/27/14 , edited 12/27/14
In response to the original question, no.
I actually have a fairly stable idea of what I would like to do for the rest of my life. I don't recall ever feeling lost for my future.
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35 / M
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Posted 12/27/14
Yes, in two different ways.

I wake up every day with a feeling like I should use this moment to get something done. To accomplish something in some way. I feel like life is so short that I will never be able to do all that I want to do and all that I should do. And that also means I need to set longer term goals and work towards them..

But then... There's those moments that typically strike me this time of year, typically later in the evening, and it just strikes me how incredibly short life is. And how little I have left of it. I feel like,

"Fuck. I'm 33 years old, and though I have done so much, gained so many skills and experiences, and yet, it all feels hollow and empty. I'm alone. I feel little joy, and cannot relax. I see all these people around me with significant others (yet, I cannot stand most people interested in me, and the idea of letting someone get that close to me again really scares the fuck out of me, and, quite frankly, I'm comfortable being alone), and somehow, while others rarely seem to work hard at anything, they also strike me as incredibly foolish, lazy, and self absorbed. They experience little rather than diving into life as I have at times... yet... there's something. Something to their lives that makes me yearn and wish I was more.... "human". "

And then I get swept up in the whole death thing: my death, the death of the human race, and eventually the death of the universe itself. I try to think about what would come after, if I could survive it. If I weren't to die, I would have to experience then next death, and if I survived that, the next... And so on. And I end up thinking about whether it is better to simply die and accept how limited life is, or to endure the death of everything else.

I dunno. The two seem kinda linked, since I typically have major HUGE plans and think in terms of years and decades when planning things long term, and yet... I only have 6-9 of them, and 3 have passed.

Overall it's just a weird myopic way of percieving time. "Every moment is precious", and "the history of entire civilizations is less than a blink of an eye" .
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22 / M / New York
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Posted 12/27/14 , edited 12/27/14
I've definitely shared similar feelings of loneliness Serif. At times it feels like everyone else is just a distraction or hindrance in one way or another, and maybe its that I don't give people enough time to warm up to me or I'm afraid of others having to rely on me when I've got an unstable balance of confidence in myself, but what I've come to realize in the end is that Life is a team effort. No single person can carry the world on their shoulders (sorry Atlas), it's people that shape your life and the life of everyone around you.

I know for a fact myself that I overlook the beauty in people and humanity when all you see on the news is war, murder, and grueling politics. Not to mention the way technology is shaping our communities today, in both good and bad ways, but mainly what I see is that people get caught up in all the noise and forget how to be humans. Too often do I see people work, stress, and act like machines. Rarely do I see 2 strangers waiting by the subway station having a conversation that may not seem to matter at all. Everyone's blasting their music, glued to their phones, and pondering about what problem they have to fix next, all minding to themselves when all it can take is talking to the person next to you to clear the storm out of your mind.

When you look back to the society my parents grew up in, kids could walk up and down the streets of even New Jersey without worrying about much at all. People relied on each other instead of the phones in their pockets, riding a bike or walking instead of lugging their cars around every corner. Without getting too off topic, my point is that phones and cars aren't bad things, nor should biking and walking be something only the less fortunate do. As an "American" raised in the one and only New York, I can tell you that people do not know what "moderation" is, everything is simply a "means to an end" and whatever gets us to that "end" quicker is "always" the right way, and it shouldn't be.

And I can continue to argue on and on about this stuff, so I'll say this: the only way us humans get anything done is together, but unfortunately, nothing ever gets done until lives are at stake and people are motivated by fear. We're afraid of each other, and society feels like a poor excuse for a prison, with everyone looking with such burdened, spiteful eyes. Like Lupe Fiasco, I feel that "All the silence is worse than all the violence, fear is such a weak emotion that I despise it." If you live your life anchored down by society and wear a mask to hide yourself from all the things you've come to fear, you're not really living a life true to yourself, but mainly a depressing lie. It's funny that I say this because I'm far from perfecting the epitome that I speak of, but by learning to be myself, day by day, little by little, I can keep moving forward and begin to live the life I want to live.

There will always be roadblocks in our way and challenges to overcome, but as I say to myself time and time again, "It all starts with a smile" haha. And just as you said "every moment is precious" but i'd add "every moment is only as precious as you make it." Our lives are far too short and filled with way too many possibilities to get caught up in the idea of regret. We all make mistakes, and we're all far from perfect, but the secret to finding our perfection may only be discovered once we come to realize how perfect life isn't and that all stars die one day, however, they can go out with a bang, with their remnants being passed on to form a new generation of stars.
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29 / M / San Antonio
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Posted 12/27/14
I used to. Then I realized, there's nothing I really want out of life bad enough to actually work for it. Sooooo....yeah. Now I'm stuck here waiting to die.
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17 / F / イブキド
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Posted 12/27/14
Yup, almost everyday.
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35 / M
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Posted 12/27/14

sollenius wrote:

I've definitely shared similar feelings of loneliness Serif. At times it feels like everyone else is just a distraction or hindrance in one way or another, and maybe its that I don't give people enough time to warm up to me or I'm afraid of others having to rely on me when I've got an unstable balance of confidence in myself, but what I've come to realize in the end is that Life is a team effort. No single person can carry the world on their shoulders (sorry Atlas), it's people that shape your life and the life of everyone around you.

I know for a fact myself that I overlook the beauty in people and humanity when all you see on the news is war, murder, and grueling politics. Not to mention the way technology is shaping our communities today, in both good and bad ways, but mainly what I see is that people get caught up in all the noise and forget how to be humans. Too often do I see people work, stress, and act like machines. Rarely do I see 2 strangers waiting by the subway station having a conversation that may not seem to matter at all. Everyone's blasting their music, glued to their phones, and pondering about what problem they have to fix next, all minding to themselves when all it can take is talking to the person next to you to clear the storm out of your mind.

When you look back to the society my parents grew up in, kids could walk up and down the streets of even New Jersey without worrying about much at all. People relied on each other instead of the phones in their pockets, riding a bike or walking instead of lugging their cars around every corner. Without getting too off topic, my point is that phones and cars aren't bad things, nor should biking and walking be something only the less fortunate do. As an "American" raised in the one and only New York, I can tell you that people do not know what "moderation" is, everything is simply a "means to an end" and whatever gets us to that "end" quicker is "always" the right way, and it shouldn't be.

And I can continue to argue on and on about this stuff, so I'll say this: the only way us humans get anything done is together, but unfortunately, nothing ever gets done until lives are at stake and people are motivated by fear. We're afraid of each other, and society feels like a poor excuse for a prison, with everyone looking with such burdened, spiteful eyes. Like Lupe Fiasco, I feel that "All the silence is worse than all the violence, fear is such a weak emotion that I despise it." If you live your life anchored down by society and wear a mask to hide yourself from all the things you've come to fear, you're not really living a life true to yourself, but mainly a depressing lie. It's funny that I say this because I'm far from perfecting the epitome that I speak of, but by learning to be myself, day by day, little by little, I can keep moving forward and begin to live the life I want to live.

There will always be roadblocks in our way and challenges to overcome, but as I say to myself time and time again, "It all starts with a smile" haha. And just as you said "every moment is precious" but i'd add "every moment is only as precious as you make it." Our lives are far too short and filled with way too many possibilities to get caught up in the idea of regret. We all make mistakes, and we're all far from perfect, but the secret to finding our perfection may only be discovered once we come to realize how perfect life isn't and that all stars die one day, however, they can go out with a bang, with their remnants being passed on to form a new generation of stars.


Everything you say is true...

I don't know if I regret my path though or not.

I just feel half in and half out of step with the rest of the human race. I also tend to walk a fine line between good and evil a lot. (I'm the proverbial trickster in many ways. Cut from the same cloth as Loki and Prometheus. :P)

I hate and I love humans in equal measure, and with equal intensity for the same things.

And I do tend to go at it alone a lot.

But it's weird. I question, I guess how much of it is my own personal nature, and how much I could really go against it to get what I want. Love and a normal life seem incredibly dull and pointless, but I kinda want it. But it doesn't suit me and I could never keep it even if I were to get it. Or do the things necessary to get it. And I do like myself and my ways. I just also want to connect in my own way I guess to the rest of the world.
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M / Houston, Tx
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Posted 12/27/14
At least you guys have the brains to think about your future,

I know too many drunks dudes who doesn't understand why they even need a job.
Posted 12/27/14
I've been planning 5 years ahead for the past 4 years, but I only have vague ideals about what comes afterwards. It's usually along the lines of no work.
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22 / M / New York
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Posted 12/27/14

serifsansserif wrote:





I'm starting to really catch your drift here, being the age that you are and considering the 14 year gap we share, you've experienced a lot more than I have yet to know (Real Life, Careers, and the whole adult situation). I can't really put myself into your shoes, but from my perspective it seems like you're too used to the lifestyle you're currently living, regardless of the past. While you can't put a finger on your opinion of your past, you still know of what you'd like to plan in the future. Sure, you have an idea of how to get to that future, that's your advantage, but planning so far ahead fails to account for all the things in between, which is why time is so important. Time is possibility. And the probability of everything going as planned is more than unlikely, I tend to kill myself over changes in plans. But that's where change comes in. A good general is prepared to adapt to his foe without sacrificing his cause. And not that I really know all of what I'm talking about, but I think you need some sort of change of pace to put a different perspective in your eyes and force yourself to adapt (In a good way). Maybe its love, maybe its a job, or maybe its something you have yet to find. Whatever it may be, stick to your conscious and connect to it in your own way, as you mentioned.

Pondering about all of this made me realize again how unpredictable each day can be. Never thought I'd spend part of my day on a forum like this! I guess that's the beauty of it all, that life comes in many colors. And I'm on the same mission, trying to connect to the world in a way that'll satisfy myself just as much as everyone around me. I just gotta keep telling myself to move forward!
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