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Post Reply Why do humans believe in monogamy?
Posted 1/20/15
Serial monogamists at best.
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Posted 1/20/15
Not necessarily true. I'm pretty sure there is a sexplanation youtube video concerning this. There are people that are polygamists, and most people don't actually stay with the first person they went out with. But polygamy is kind of a weird thing depending on where you live, so there's that. Also, there are probably lots of cheaters in the world.
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Posted 1/20/15 , edited 1/20/15
Unlike other animals, humans have an extremely long and intensive childhood. Children demand a lot of attention and resources over a long period of time. This investment of time and resources makes it impractical to mate with someone who will not make a significant and ongoing contribution. Such a commitment is unlikely to be sustained if there is any doubt that the children are your own offspring, under natural circumstances, and so extended monogamy ensures that the investment of resources is devoted to ones own children and not to someone else's.
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Posted 1/20/15
For males of superior physical features tend to seek out multiple partners in an effort to help increase his bloodline. It's easier for him to find mates. In this numbers games he is more likely to have some of his offspring make it to maturity. So this arrangement if more beneficial. For the males of lesser physical stature they are more focused on one mate because it they are not able to find mates as easily so a monogamous relationship with a single female increases the chances for his bloodline to reach maturity. On the female side of things they look for two things in a mate physicality and stability. They are attracted to physically superior males in hopes of passing on said stronger genes to their offspring to help them reach maturation. On the other hand they look for stability and security in a male to help in the raising of their offspring thus insuring maturation of said offspring. If you look at history then and even now you can see this pattern just from a biological stand point. Now through in emotions, religion and culture things get muddled a bit but the biology is still there.
Posted 1/20/15 , edited 1/20/15
I think you can only truly love one person at a time but for sex or not too serious relationships then it wouldn't matter if you have 2-4 partners.

The reason why I don't believe in Polygamy relationships is because I can't feel the same way for 2 or more people at the same time. I will either love more or like less one of them. Also, I like the idea of being the whole world for one person or see one person as my whole world ( I'm so romantic ). I couldn't stand knowing that my loved one has feelings for another girl or wants to fuck another person other than me. I'm jealous and possessive, I don't like to share.

One thing is to cheat and another thing is to be part of a polygamy relationship. Polygamous people don't believe in "cheating", they can sleep with whomever they want as long as they all agree with it. There's nothing wrong with that but I could never be part of that because...it is just the way I am.
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Posted 1/20/15
Human's aren't all monogamous. Polygamy exists and has existed for ages. Monogamy is just more popular now. When you hear of polygamy you think of a man with many wives but there's even polyandry, where a wife can have many husbands.
Posted 1/20/15 , edited 1/20/15
because sharing your intimacy with one person makes it unique and one of a kind between you and the other person and nobody else, well, it feels more special to me.
Posted 1/20/15 , edited 1/20/15
Majority rule. Purpose wise, today, people do not trust one another and will of course not share their resources and nor will it be a balanced system. Favoritism and Paranoia rule.

HuastecoOtaku wrote:


Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
Oscar Wilde


Think he was ghaaaaaaaay..would have to check.
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Posted 1/20/15
Polygamy would be way too difficult to handle, especially since most men probably aren't well-equipped to handle one woman.
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Posted 1/20/15

severticas wrote:

Majority rule. Purpose wise, today, people do not trust one another and will of course not share their resources and nor will it be a balanced system. Favoritism and Paranoia rule.

HuastecoOtaku wrote:


Bigamy is having one wife too many. Monogamy is the same.
Oscar Wilde


Think he was ghaaaaaaaay..would have to check.


He was a complicated man.
Posted 1/20/15

Sogno- wrote:

rather than getting married to multiple people just don't commit to anyone and screw around all you want


This.
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Posted 1/20/15

Ronxz wrote:

Something I've been curious about, why do we only have one on one relationships? We don't have some kind of mental connection mate for life thing going on. There isn't a real reason we couldn't have multiple partners. And a lot of the arguments about having multiple partners make sense ( i.e. - shared resources, mutual child raising, increased family support, etc.). So why do we accept only having one partner as the normal thing and stick to it?

-Ronxz


There are several monogamous, or at least primarily monogamous, species in nature. Humans are among them. There are cultures that practice polygamy, some that are purely patriarchal, a very few that are matriarchal, but throughout the world individual coupling is now, and always has been the majority and the norm. This is not a made-up thing due to a religion or culture since monogamy is the most common form of marriage throughout the world for recorded history.

More than simply sex and child rearing, monogamous relationships cement the family unit and provide moral, mental, and emotional support far beyond that which can be achieved in other relationships. When one has multiple partners, jealousy, timing, and resource sharing become problems and a certain detachment is required. When one expects a relationship to end, one is not fully invested in it. Only when one is fully committed does one gain the peace of mind, confidence, and stability that a loving relationship can bring.

My parents have been married nearly 40 years. My grandparents met in middle school and were together until they died. They were together for around 80 years, and married for over 75 years. A dear friend of mine has been married for 20 years and still writes his wife love songs on weekends. These people never have to worry about being "good enough." These people never have to fear betrayal. They don't have to get checked for VD. Their children have good examples to follow, and there is no question as to authority and discipline in child rearing (no, "but you're not really my dad" crap happens to them).

Human beings also have strong egos, and we crave to be the most important thing to someone. The rarity of a thing influences its value and being the one for your partner is quite empowering. Being one of a dozen is not nearly such a compliment.

Nature is full of species with different biological habits. Human beings happen to be largely (though not always exclusively) monogamous. That's just the way we're built.

And for those who think monogamy is overrated : YOU MUST BE DOING IT WRONG. I've been around the block - a lot. A whole lot. I can tell you from a vast amount of experience that there is nothing, and I mean NOTHING that feels so good as the person you value most in the world valuing you just as highly.
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Posted 1/20/15

PapaNeko wrote:

The reason humans practice monogamy is simple biology. It is a behavior that significantly helps both the male and female pass their genes on to future generations. Human children take an inordinate amount of time in gestation and then even longer to mature into self sufficient creatures. So it is vitally important for both parents to invest the time and resources to ensure the survival of their offspring, which would be sticking together for more than a decade.

And yes, it is a viable reproductive strategy for a male to try to impregnate as many women as possible. Although it would have been much less so in the formative years of mankind. If the male is not there to help protect their offspring, it would be less likely to survive. Either the mother fails to find assistance in providing for the child and the child perishes; or, as is common in other primates, a male she does pair up with kills the child that is not his.


This is a very good point also.
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Posted 1/20/15
I don't know, maybe because it's the norm? I also don't want another partner than the one I currently have.
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Posted 1/20/15
Are we mere animals that reproduce with anything of the same kid? Those who chose to reproduce with multiple one state that and those who believe in monogamy state that we are no longer animals that have to reproduce brutally against each others.

And that was they taught at my class in school and colleague.
yet since I hear the word harem I was like Hummm...
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