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Post Reply Sex and our Partners Today
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22 / M / New Jersey
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Posted 2/28/15
When you met your significant other, did you mind that they had sex with other people? In our current generation, sex is so common that it is no longer a surprise that when you meet your love, that they've already done it with some other person (or persons, multiple partners).

The number of people who have not had sex grows smaller as age increases because with more time, there are more opportunities of having relationships.

Unless you are still together with your high school sweet heart (which is the minority here), chances are, the girl or guy have already experienced sex (either with 1 or more than 1 encounters).

My question is directed to everyone including couples and those not in a relationship.
For those that are not in a relationship, how would you deal with the situation if you were going to be in one?


How do you feel about the idea that they've had partners before who have delved into their bodies, who know about their physical secrets (such as what makes them turned on), who knows what it feels like?

or that when you guys are having sex, the thought of someone else having already been in that position, doing the same thing, experiencing the same thing?


Perhaps I am indeed overthinking the situation, but even so, I would like an honest answer of how you dealt with the situation and how you felt. Do any of the thoughts i mention from above come across your thoughts? why or why not?




Posted 2/28/15 , edited 2/28/15
Overall I don't care of there history except if they have some disease other than that it doesn't matter how many partners they've had in the past I won't disfavor someone merely on the number of sexual partners and label them for the way they choose to live but merely observe it and accept it as well as I can for what it is.

I think some may want to look into the origins of husbandry and analyze the influence it has on society today since It shapes the default setting that is monogamy and the purpose it originally was implemented for.Not to say it's good or bad what I assert is not moralistic in anyway so don't interpret it that way.
Posted 2/28/15 , edited 2/28/15
I think maybe because you're young/naïve or inexperienced... that you have this mentality.

but... the older you get, the more things like this doesn't really matter.... human's skin shed itself everyday... you're not going to catch your partner's ex-partner's germs.../cooties (unless it's herpes).

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50 / M / Chicago, IL
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Posted 2/28/15
Well considering I had a sexual history when I met She Who Became My Wife, it would have been pretty hypocritical for me to care. Now mind you we know each other's sexual history in a vague way. I have not told her everything and neither has she told me. She knows some highlights and has met my first girlfriend who took my virginity.

I think you are overthinking it. Don't worry about your partner's past lovers
be the lover that puts all the other lovers to shame
be the lover so your partner will never feel the need to go to another one.

And being that lover is not just what you do in the bedroom. Think Gomez and Morticia Addams.
Posted 2/28/15
Well, it's natural you want to ride before you buy. That way, you know if it is too big to fit in certain parking spots, whether it is easy to parallel park, and if they are any dents your insurance will cover.
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50 / M / Chicago, IL
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Posted 2/28/15

PeripheralVisionary wrote:

Well, it's natural you want to ride before you buy. That way, you know if it is too big to fit in certain parking spots, whether it is easy to parallel park, and if they are any dents your insurance will cover.


That is giving me a chuckle, what a metaphor.

My grandmother used to tell my sisters, "Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free."
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25 / M
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Posted 2/28/15
I just screw around around have fun basically, so no I don't care XD or actually, the easier he/she is,the bigger the chance I can play with them! :3
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Posted 2/28/15

GayAsianBoy wrote:

I think maybe because you're young/naïve or inexperienced... that you have this mentality.

but... the older you get, the more things like this doesn't really matter.... human's skin shed itself everyday... you're not going to catch your partner's ex-partner's germs.../cooties (unless it's herpes).



maybe you're just a pervert
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21 / M / Florida
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Posted 3/1/15

PeripheralVisionary wrote:

Well, it's natural you want to ride before you buy. That way, you know if it is too big to fit in certain parking spots, whether it is easy to parallel park, and if they are any dents your insurance will cover.


Posted 3/1/15
I don't see how being a pervert or not makes my point any less valid... or has anything to do with my point. :-/

what are you going to do when you're 40 and single? are you going to wait for some 40 year old virgin to come to you? or would you no longer care about these things?
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24 / M / Midland, Texas
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Posted 3/1/15
I believe personal responsibility plays a huge factor in deciding somethings such as this. I have been in relationships since I was in middle school and I've previously dated 7 girls which I never had sex with because I knew we would eventually go our separate ways. They were all very nice and break ups that occurred were never done on bad terms. I'm even in a relationship now and am still a virgin. My moral code is that I won't have sex until I am married and I'd expect to fall in love and marry with someone who has similar values and morals. Being responsible for ones actions is a quality I hold in high regard, and I've been fortunate to be around many people like that who are happy with their lives. If I made make the mistake of having sex with someone before I knew I'd be spending the rest of my life with them, I'd be in contradiction with my moral code. I would continue making mistakes and make excuses for myself like saying that "everyone does this" or that "I'm only human so it can't be helped." I'd keep making more mistakes a poor decisions which would eventually hurt the people around me and that is something I will never allow. So, the answer is that it comes down to what standard you regard yourself and others around you in, and are you willing to stay true to who you are and what you believe in based upon the record that is your life. Also, will you be happy with the choices you make? So far I'd say I'm very happy.
Posted 3/1/15 , edited 3/1/15

bobsagget wrote:


GayAsianBoy wrote:

I think maybe because you're young/naïve or inexperienced... that you have this mentality.

but... the older you get, the more things like this doesn't really matter.... human's skin shed itself everyday... you're not going to catch your partner's ex-partner's germs.../cooties (unless it's herpes).



maybe you're just a pervert


That was probably the most irrelevant thing to say about that post.

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28 / M / Seattle
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Posted 3/1/15 , edited 3/1/15
If you're worried, it's probably cause you are insecure about your body/dick size/experience/you're premature ejaculation... etc. Don't be, just be honest so she ain't all surprised when you guys do it.

As for your question OP, that shit use to bother me as well but after gettin a few partners in myself it didn't. In fact, virgins are somewhat irritating. They're nervous which makes them sweaty before the deed, first time hurts so you gotta stop or slow down a lot, they just lay there, and you imprint on them for life.
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It doesn't matter.
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Posted 3/1/15
You need to be able to accept that they had a life before they met you.
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22 / M / Hongdae
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Posted 3/1/15 , edited 3/1/15
Im one of the rare few who has only made sweet love to palmela handerson - if you catch my drift.

I used to care if others had sexual relations with others, but since its so rare to find someone at this age who hasn't - I just let it go and dont ask or think about it. So long as they dont try and brag about anything they've done, how many, or who, it doesn't bother me at all anymore.
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