Post Reply When your best friends don't like each other.
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21 / F / Fort Worth, Texas
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Posted 3/11/15
Have you guys ever been in a position where two of your favorite people dislike each other?

Like, of course you want them to like each other! You want GROUPS of friends! Not hang out with one, then go to the other, etc. You want to do things together! With both! I hate solitary friends so I often end up merging friends and having them meet each other.

One of then instantly degraded to petty insults and the other kinda continued the toxic attitude by being sarcastic...

Have you guys been in this situation? They're both becoming such unlikable people...

Please, if you've been here, maybe some light insight in this topic would help!
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27 / M
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Posted 3/11/15 , edited 3/11/15
Yes. This is why I keep separate friend groups.

I have my best childhood friend, my best partner in crime, my best childhood girl friend, my best college girl friend, my best church friend, my best high school friend, my best ex, etc. I have my party friends, my board game friends, my restaurant adventure friends, and my straightedge friends.

I keep in contact with all of them and I'm on good terms with everyone, but I once learned the hard way not to mix them. You avoid so much drama by keeping them apart.


I've also been the volatile one in a mixed group. One of my best friends had me meet a good friend of theirs and our personalities were just completely incompatible. I did not try to force it and straight up told them never to let me see that guy again. At least I leap out when I realize I'm reacting. I think it's best to try prying them apart even if some damage has been done. Just try to keep them away from one another. I've always considered myself an introverted loner at heart, so I'm able to look down from above and keep my distance when I want to.

Think of them as periodic table elements or something. Group carefully and don't mix randomly. If a reaction occurs, don't let it complete and try to minimize the damage.

If you want to hang with multiple people, maybe get them to introduce you to their friends. Just be sure not to get drawn into anything. Only you can control what you do, after all.
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21 / F / Fort Worth, Texas
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Posted 3/11/15 , edited 3/11/15

Morbidhanson wrote:

Yes. This is why I keep separate friend groups.

I have my best childhood friend, my best partner in crime, my best childhood girl friend, my best college girl friend, my best church friend, my best high school friend, my best ex, etc. I have my party friends, my board game friends, my restaurant adventure friends, and my straightedge friends.

I keep in contact with all of them and I'm on good terms with everyone, but I once learned the hard way not to mix them. You avoid so much drama by keeping them apart.


I've also been the volatile one in a mixed group. One of my best friends had me meet a good friend of theirs and our personalities were just completely incompatible. I did not try to force it and straight up told them never to let me see that guy again. At least I leap out when I realize I'm reacting. I think it's best to try prying them apart even if some damage has been done. Just try to keep them away from one another.

Think of them as periodic table elements or something. Group carefully and don't mix randomly. If a reaction occurs, don't let it complete and try to minimize the damage.

If you want to hang with multiple people, maybe get them to introduce you to their friends. Just be sure not to get drawn into anything. Only you can control what you do, after all.


Unfortunately, those mixed friend groups don't do well with me.

If I have so many "friends" who can't get along, there's a bit more wrong than meets the eye... Thanks for insightful comment though!
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Posted 3/11/15
I feel like if they are understanding enough, they won't force the issue of choosing sides on you.

Yea my advice is basically like what Morbidhanson said. Don't mix the incompatible ones together when hanging out unless you want some awkward or cold atmosphere. If they dislike you hanging out with others then just don't tell them i guess.

Some people just can't reconcile with each others. Had like a really bad case of 2 room mates who hate each other's guts so much that one of them got charged with assault charge and got evicted, and a couple who broke up for reasons unknown to me and can't stand each other in the same room ever since. I am on good terms with all of them but sometimes you just can't help them reconcile unless with the help of a therapist or something.

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Posted 3/11/15 , edited 3/11/15

Magical-Soul wrote:

Have you guys ever been in a position where two of your favorite people dislike each other?

Like, of course you want them to like each other! You want GROUPS of friends! Not hang out with one, then go to the other, etc. You want to do things together! With both! I hate solitary friends so I often end up merging friends and having them meet each other.

One of then instantly degraded to petty insults and the other kinda continued the toxic attitude by being sarcastic...

Have you guys been in this situation? They're both becoming such unlikable people...

Please, if you've been here, maybe some light insight in this topic would help!


Moved this to Advice, Info, Recommendations. I don't really have advice, but I was once in a situation with several other friends where one former "couple" in our circle couldn't stop fighting with each long after they'd broken up. Ugh, really awkward and unpleasant.
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