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Post Reply stupid but deep question (non anime topic)
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23 / M
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Posted 3/12/15
so stupid question and its more of an opinion thing.... (turn back now if your expecting something anime related)

so i was dating this girl for a while and she was always manipulative (not knowing it at the time because i was head over heels for her)
but she always said (even before we were dating) "i wish you were less smart" and i never understood why
later we broke up she got pregnant to some other guy who she dumped me for.
and here i am a year later over her but still wondering what did she mean by "i wish you were less smart"
i know she was manipulative in hindsight but i don't know if there was any deeper meaning
any opinions anyone?
Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/12/15
Sometimes people have trouble identifying with smarter people than themselves. Sometimes people just feel really stupid if they're just average and the person their with is really smart. I wouldn't read too much into it and just leave it be.
Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/12/15
I don't think she mean that in a hurtful way to you. Maybe she meant it, in a kind you take things to seriously. I think maybe if it bother you. You should ask people you know what they think of you and maybe you may get your answer.
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17 / M / The Bay
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Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/12/15
Well depending on the circumstances with her and that other guy, she might have been tying to get pregnant from you then was going to lock your future together or bring a lawsuit. Basically manipulate your will into her favor. Idk the situation or the background, but I've heard about to many court cases that follow that concept.
Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/12/15
its like that one girl in that one anime, who always says something, but the mc doesnt notice, and the the other character, says "damn, your so dense". Maybe something like that? i dont know, im just really tired, and now i have to use spark notes on a book :/
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23 / M
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Posted 3/12/15
yeah i know that i really dodged a bullet by her leaving me because there were a lot of character flaws between us
(like her being manipulative and me having slight anxiety)
and the guy she did leave me for (in my opinion) is alot less smart then i am.
i just sometimes wonder because she was my technicle first true girlfriend if that maybe there was some wisdom behind anything she meant
i know for a fact that i do get high anxiety and when that happens i get frustrated
and sometimes when i ask questions it leads to more questions
and i can be a bit weird (i watch anime and play video games alot after all)
but i believe i have a good heart and that i have a great sense of empathy for others...

i guess the question has changed from why doesnt she want me to why doesnt anyone want me...
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33 / M / Denver
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Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/12/15
I don't think there was a deeper meaning. I think she was just saying that to bring you down. She's unhappy with herself and that comment was a way of taking it out on you. Happy people don't say things like that. Dwelling on that comment will only make you think of her, which is what she wants. Misery loves company.
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33 / M / Denver
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Posted 3/12/15

fire_rdr wrote:

yeah i know that i really dodged a bullet by her leaving me because there were a lot of character flaws between us
(like her being manipulative and me having slight anxiety)
and the guy she did leave me for (in my opinion) is alot less smart then i am.
i just sometimes wonder because she was my technicle first true girlfriend if that maybe there was some wisdom behind anything she meant
i know for a fact that i do get high anxiety and when that happens i get frustrated
and sometimes when i ask questions it leads to more questions
and i can be a bit weird (i watch anime and play video games alot after all)
but i believe i have a good heart and that i have a great sense of empathy for others...

i guess the question has changed from why doesnt she want me to why doesnt anyone want me...


You identified problem areas that you're aware and want to work on. But then you ended it equating your lack of a partner to your self-worth. If you need a partner to feel fulfilled, and there's nothing wrong with that by the way, then go out to the bars and clubs, and meet as many people as you can. If you don't want to do the public route, there's match.com, eharmony, craigslist, and thousands more. You're beating yourself over a relationship that ended instead of moving on to your next relationship. ~ A new love heals a broken heart ~
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F / Earth Realm
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Posted 3/12/15
Intelligence is a great quality to have. Find ways cope with your anxiety whether it be meds, physical workouts, any healthy way of blowing off
steam. The idea is to maintain a healthy balance for yourself and not an extreme. If you find that games and anime are what
make you happy find a girl who genuinely shares your interests it makes it easier for you; besides you should be true to yourself
and not push yourself to be something you are not simply to appease others. As difficult as it may be for you don't live in the past. Live now and move forward OK Im done with the word vomit.... peace out
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21 / M / Canada eh
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Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/12/15

fire_rdr wrote:

yeah i know that i really dodged a bullet by her leaving me because there were a lot of character flaws between us
(like her being manipulative and me having slight anxiety)
and the guy she did leave me for (in my opinion) is alot less smart then i am.
i just sometimes wonder because she was my technicle first true girlfriend if that maybe there was some wisdom behind anything she meant
i know for a fact that i do get high anxiety and when that happens i get frustrated
and sometimes when i ask questions it leads to more questions
and i can be a bit weird (i watch anime and play video games alot after all)
but i believe i have a good heart and that i have a great sense of empathy for others...

i guess the question has changed from why doesnt she want me to why doesnt anyone want me...


Hey man, I used to think like that too. Just be yourself when you're looking for someone, no need to change anything. All of my close buds were getting into relationships, I was the only one single so it was discouraging. But I waited. As I waited though, I worked on improving myself. Whether it be physically or mentally or both. And she came out of nowhere. She came into my life by storm and she's amazing. You'll meet a good one man, just keep your head up.

Oh and it's good to be in a relationship, but being single has its' perks as well so enjoy it as much as you can You might not be able to watch anime and play video games as much haha. But who knows? Maybe the girl will watch anime and play video games as much as you do.
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23 / M
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Posted 3/12/15
hey just wanted to thanks you guys and gals for the support and advice
i hope to better myself and and hopefully move on fully
and also thanks for being understanding. i havent really payed much attention to the community of crunchy roll (mainly just watched the animes and sometimes checked the comment section)
this was good to see that the jerks didnt come out of the woodwork on this subject so thanks
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F / West
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Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/13/15
Your forum topic sounded very sincere and just give it time and find places that people have similar interests with yours...I believe eventually you will find someone you want and will want you back .
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26 / M / Socal
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Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/13/15

fire_rdr wrote:

hey just wanted to thanks you guys and gals for the support and advice
i hope to better myself and and hopefully move on fully
and also thanks for being understanding. i havent really payed much attention to the community of crunchy roll (mainly just watched the animes and sometimes checked the comment section)
this was good to see that the jerks didnt come out of the woodwork on this subject so thanks


Good luck m8



btw I can be one of those jerks sometimes
I had my daily troll quota filled though so...
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22 / M
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Posted 3/12/15 , edited 3/13/15

byClear wrote:

Well depending on the circumstances with her and that other guy, she might have been tying to get pregnant from you then was going to lock your future together or bring a lawsuit. Basically manipulate your will into her favor. Idk the situation or the background, but I've heard about to many court cases that follow that concept.


^ this

I think the same as she/he does, I guess she wanted you to be more of an idiot so she could take advantage of you in the near future

but you know what they say: what goes around comes around
Posted 3/13/15 , edited 3/13/15
Yeah, "I wish you weren't as smart" sounds indicative of an inferiority complex. Yeah, I think you're better off having to carry that baggage with you.

It's jealousy imho. The only time I've heard something sounding like that was when someone was pointing out someone was being overly sarcastic ("smart-ass") , but clearly that isn't the case here. Like you stated, she wanted someone easier to manipulate.
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