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Post Reply Rights of a person under 18
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Posted 5/16/15 , edited 5/16/15
Yes, a minor should be able to make some decisions for himself/herself at a certain point, especially if it is of the variety that is very subjective and not too major. But that is a very shaky and uncertain standard. There's no bright-line rule for what choices minors should be able to make, since it really depends on the circumstances.

But people who are like....10 should realize that they are not experienced and not wise in the ways of the world, so they should enjoy the time spent under the roof of their guardian or parent. It's really easy and fun to be a child so the time ought to be cherished. People seem to be growing up way too fast. For instance, I've nearly died several times by the time I was beginning my adolescence so I always thought as though I lived on borrowed time and never made a big fuss about independence.

Bugs the hell out of me when some cheeky brat who is 12 years old thinks he/she is ready to be an adult. ENJOY growing up, please. It's good for you not to be so impatient and it's better to bide your time until the moment is right.
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Posted 5/16/15
It's just an event, you're not going to a torture chamber. Just suck it up and go, and hey, there will be food.
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M
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Posted 5/16/15 , edited 5/16/15
Unpleasant social events are a part of life you may do well to get used to. You may think you have no use for those people now, but you can never really know what will happen in the future. There's an adolescent competition between "I'm my own person with my own friends, I don't care about those people" with the real-world demands that require you to act friendly with strangers and distant relations to get along in the working world.

Familial ties can go a long way in life -- maybe someone you met only once at that wedding can help hook you up with a job, or let you stay with them in another country for free while you tour Europe because you (can say you) met them at that wedding they also didn't want to go to.

Plus, keeping your parents happy with their unreasonable yet non-dangerous demands will serve you in the long run as well. You may need them to lend you money or something in the future.

When parents force their kids to do things, the underlying motive is usually a clumsy but well-meaning attempt to impart experience and knowledge.
Posted 5/16/15
Call the police on them and get them arrested, make it sound like they're abusing you, got that?
Posted 5/16/15
I think smarter people should have more rights, regardless of age.
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20 / M / Sweden
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Posted 5/16/15

Nalaniel wrote:

Why do the parents of a child have the right to do as they please and send their child to festivities they find appropriate? For example, a member of the family (cousin) gets married and invites all the "close" relatives, why does the child of the parents that were invited to the marriage has to go to the marriage if it doesn't want to? Just because the parents say so? So a kid can't decide if they want to stay in contact with someone or not because the parents say so? Do you think that's okay and if so, why? Don't you think the kid can make some decisions in its life without influence of their parents?


You follow their rules as long as you live whit them, whenever you get yourself a home then you can tell them to fuck off
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46 / M / Between yesterday...
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Posted 5/16/15

Nalaniel wrote:

Why do the parents of a child have the right to do as they please and send their child to festivities they find appropriate? For example, a member of the family (cousin) gets married and invites all the "close" relatives, why does the child of the parents that were invited to the marriage has to go to the marriage if it doesn't want to? Just because the parents say so? So a kid can't decide if they want to stay in contact with someone or not because the parents say so? Do you think that's okay and if so, why? Don't you think the kid can make some decisions in its life without influence of their parents?


I will use the statement my father the attorney used with me several times while I was growing up. "Look at that chair, you and it have the same rights." What this means is you are a minor and have an extremely limited set of rights. You have laws that actually protect you but they are not equal to rights. Once you turn 18 you are an adult and gain your rights with those rights you have responsibilities as well.

Now in the example you are giving I suspect they see it as a way of showing family support for the marriage. As for the parent say being law in the household "That chair you are sitting in, you and it have the same rights when it comes to this until you are 18 you do what they say." Granted my family was really liberal about what I could and couldn't do the old adage "enough rope to hang himself with" was the phrase around the house so yeah we had a lot of freedom to be kids but we had to do family stuff and fall in line when needed.
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34 / F / US
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Posted 5/16/15
Because you live in their home and it's their rules, especially if you're not fully supporting yourself. It won't kill someone to go to a wedding. Now if there's an important reason you don't want to see the relative like abuse then it's best to explain that. Otherwise, no. Being rude to your parents isn't a right.
Sogno- 
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Posted 5/16/15 , edited 5/16/15

cleruninja wrote:

But hey, free cake.


totally worth
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Posted 5/16/15

Sogno- wrote:


cleruninja wrote:

But hey, free cake.


totally worth


You're not going to see another catered affair till your OWN wedding, kid. Cash in.
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Posted 5/16/15
Because your frontal lobe isn't developed.
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51 / M / Inside the Anime...
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Posted 5/16/15
You're a child, and haven't fully matured yet, so a guardian/ parent is obligated to make those decisions for you. The responsibility of raising a child is enormous , costly and emotionally challenging. Give your parents a little more respect before they turn into dirt. All they want is your love, happiness and well being, however they also want you to be a part of their life. They didn't choose to let a weird teenage kid live in their house eat their food for no reason. Trust me on this one, I bowed out of activities my parents wanted me to go on with them, I'm starting to cry thinking of the time I missed with them because I wanted to go hang out with my friends....I was foolish, and now they are gone....I have nothing....
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Posted 5/16/15
I had some friends once whose daughter was over 18 and in college. She announced that since she was over 18 she didn't have to do what they wanted (i.e. attend classes, etc.) She was feeling pretty good until they gave her a bill for room, board and tuition, whereupon she decided that it was better to do what they said. Welcome to the adult world.

Even when you leave home and get a job, you have to do the job the way the boss wants, or you don't have a job. If you want to drive a car, you have to obey the traffic laws.
cero69 
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29 / M / warwick
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Posted 5/16/15 , edited 5/16/15
they clothes the fed and sheltered you and on top of that who do you think is responsible when you go out and do something stupid to get arrested and has to bail your ass out. and when you have children of your own your going to learn that raising a child is not easy
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22 / M / Guarding your Shack
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Posted 5/16/15 , edited 5/16/15
The least you could do is respect their wishes for now, you won't be living under their roof for long.

At least, I hope not...
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