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Post Reply How do I deal with my parents dirvorce
Posted 6/1/15
the community's here for you, RuinedDruid San!
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Posted 6/1/15

ExiAHesP wrote:

yeah cutting, self harm, bad thoughts, depressive state of mind, suicidal tendencies, self hatred
all bad things, seek a help-inator friend guy or even one of those kids help lines and feel weird for 5 minutes but somehow better afterwards
also friends or family tell em good


Ya I know I am trying to not...I haven't in awhile so hopefully I won't go back to that
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Posted 6/1/15
Ruined Druid keep your head up! Good things will happen soon take it from me i was in your exact position a few years ago myself.
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Posted 6/1/15
Sometimes you need someone to step up and be the voice of reason. Call it out accept it for what it is. My parents who were married for 20+ years ended up going through a divorce. Emotions can and will run high... high enough that they won't see the infinite loop of suffering they are bringing upon themselves.

Usually logic and love don't mix, but this is where it does. A reset back to being friends (and parents) but nothing more is what worked in my case. If they don't respond to that you may as well give up all hope and stay completely out of it. If it comes to that try not to let yourself get emotionally involved.

There is no easy answer here, but no matter what you need a bit of bravery and a thick skin.
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Posted 6/2/15 , edited 6/2/15

ExiAHesP wrote:

make yourself addicted to tea and coffee, when you feel weird drink one of them
also stay in school and play lots of chess


I swear by tea.
It was my happy place when my parents got divorced, but I didn't like either of them very much so I guess it's different for op.
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Posted 6/2/15

Sir_jamesalot wrote:


ExiAHesP wrote:

make yourself addicted to tea and coffee, when you feel weird drink one of them
also stay in school and play lots of chess


I swear by tea.
It was my happy place when my parents got divorced, but I didn't like either of them very much so I guess it's different for you.


I love my tea, coffee too.
My parents were never married , but pretty much split up after I was around 2 or 3 years old.
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Posted 6/2/15

ExiAHesP wrote:


Sir_jamesalot wrote:


ExiAHesP wrote:

make yourself addicted to tea and coffee, when you feel weird drink one of them
also stay in school and play lots of chess


I swear by tea.
It was my happy place when my parents got divorced, but I didn't like either of them very much so I guess it's different for you.


I love my tea, coffee too.
My parents were never married , but pretty much split up after I was around 2 or 3 years old.


I see what i did. fixed.
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Posted 6/2/15

Sir_jamesalot wrote:


ExiAHesP wrote:


Sir_jamesalot wrote:


ExiAHesP wrote:

make yourself addicted to tea and coffee, when you feel weird drink one of them
also stay in school and play lots of chess


I swear by tea.
It was my happy place when my parents got divorced, but I didn't like either of them very much so I guess it's different for you.


I love my tea, coffee too.
My parents were never married , but pretty much split up after I was around 2 or 3 years old.


I see what i did. fixed.


hmmm
oh
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Posted 6/2/15
I would love to be able to say I understand how you feel, but unreality I have no idea what you are currently going through. However, you have displayed an interesting point: family is supposed to stay together. This may make you more dedicated to any future family you may have. I can't tell you why this happened, but as a philosopher once said "life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards" (not verbatim). I can however pray for you, and I'm pretty sure I can get some of my family in on the prayer group.
Hope this helps,
Daws~
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Posted 6/2/15 , edited 6/2/15
Again thanks everyone for the kind words, I have been using music as my outlet and it seems to be doing alright. As of right now I just put "I Won't Give In" by Asking Alexandria on repeat haha. I found a great cover of it too!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ww1Cn0cPTjg

I am doing a bit better now and I can't thank all of your for your words it has really helped me. I never really got into forums, but I decided to the day I found out my mom was moving out again and I am glad I did thanks every one!
Posted 6/4/15

RuinedDruid wrote:

Again thanks everyone for the kind words, I have been using music as my outlet and it seems to be doing alright. As of right now I just put "I Won't Give In" by Asking Alexandria on repeat haha. I found a great cover of it too!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ww1Cn0cPTjg

I am doing a bit better now and I can't thank all of your for your words it has really helped me. I never really got into forums, but I decided to the day I found out my mom was moving out again and I am glad I did thanks every one!


Whenever you need support or help, there are people here for you! Best of luck and warmest wishes, Druid!!
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Posted 6/6/15
I will say this as someone whose parents are divorced. If you mom is acting like that it is better if she and your father divorce. I understand wanting to keep the family together but she is hurting him by doing all of this and he would be better off with someone who loves him and wants to be there with him.

I was 11 when my parents divorced. It hurt a lot but my parents were fighting all the time and they weren't in love anymore. Now that I'm older I wish they had divorced sooner since in the end all they did was hurt each other because they were determined to keep the family together for me and my older sister.

It hurts but your parents may be able to find people they love and get along better with each other if it comes to that.

I hope what I am saying eases you a little about the situation. I kind of ranted based on my own personal history. If you need an ear I am available usually whenever.
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Posted 6/6/15
Tell them that you are both really angry and dissopointed in them. Tell them that they are acting like morons and you feel like shit because of it, and that they should change. Show them how you have cutted yourself and tell them how bad it all makes you feel.

If that doesnt work, nothing will.
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Posted 6/6/15
I thought about that, but my parents are so protective of me that they would constantly watch me to make sure i wasn't going to kill my self.....I am 17 and have to go to bed at 9 still on school nights and I can't go to a friends house unless there is a parent it is pretty ridiculous
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Posted 6/6/15

RuinedDruid wrote:

I thought about that, but my parents are so protective of me that they would constantly watch me to make sure i wasn't going to kill my self.....I am 17 and have to go to bed at 9 still on school nights and I can't go to a friends house unless there is a parent it is pretty ridiculous


I get that it may be stringent but they are just worried about you. Not the best way of handling it but its understandable.

Ive been there though my parents came down super hard this year when they caught my younger brother smoking weed.
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