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Post Reply Why don't women ever just say no?
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27 / M
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Posted 6/4/15 , edited 6/7/15
Too many men base their self-worth on female approval and a "NO" is a really bad word that deals heavy damage. What follows are desperate manoeuver to save some scrap of that, from being rude to less plesent displays of a dying ego. I've hardly ever see guys just take a no and walk away. The question should rather be, why are so many men such self-loathing pussy beggers that they can't take a no? And why would they keep wasting their time on one woman who already said no instead of moving on? Mysteries beyond my headache capacity.
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21 / F
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Posted 6/4/15
Because you're assuming that "all women act like this." Any generalization that lumps an entire gender together is sexism/prejudice. I'm sorry that that's been your experience with women, but please don't assume that therefore that's how ALL women behave.
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29 / M / Atlanta, GA, USA
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Posted 6/4/15
In my case, it's because women are saying yes.
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F / Boston-ish
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Posted 6/4/15 , edited 6/4/15

eeveetree wrote:

Because you're assuming that "all women act like this." Any generalization that lumps an entire gender together is sexism/prejudice. I'm sorry that that's been your experience with women, but please don't assume that therefore that's how ALL women behave.


On top of that, there's a scolding tone, and the patronizing suggestion that he knows better than women what would be better for them, "saving you a whole lot of time and stress." Seems like a nice self-serving rationalization for getting women to behave the way he wants them to.
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Posted 6/4/15 , edited 6/4/15

eeveetree wrote:

1. There are women who just say no.

2. There are PLENTY of men who don't just say 'no' and try to come up with some fancy response. This has happened to me.

I agree that it would be best if everyone was more straightforward with rejection, but I have serious issues with your sexist tone. Check yourself hon.

#Shotsfired

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29 / M / Aboard the Hyperion
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Posted 6/4/15
There really is no absolute answer to this question. In most cases, the reasons are riddled with observation bias, hence why I am thoroughly amused by many of the previous replies. That on top of which there are many different reasons people would always justify. In an "ideal" situation a simple no from the girl and a simple acceptance of that answer from the guy finishes the situation in the least amount of time and drama. Read that carefully, it takes effort from both sides.
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22 / M / Guarding your Shack
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Posted 6/4/15 , edited 6/4/15
And the regret begins to seep into the OP's consciousness as he is butchered by those that see him as a possible "sexist" for asking a thoughtless question.

You'd been better off asking this on one of those relationship Q&A websites.



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Posted 6/4/15
Well I have never been confessed to or anything romantic like that so I have never had to out-rightly reject someone

but I have had someone beg me for my number even though I said I didn't want to give it. I mean, I said it multiple times "I don't give my number to people I've just met" (ie: I don't give my number to strangers) That seems nice enough right? You don't have to be a genius to understand that it is a 'no' if I said it twice. Anyways I had to go into someone elses house and pretend it was my apartment because he ended up following me home. Unpleasant.
Posted 6/4/15
how about not being freaky in the first place and form a friendship with the person before asking them out
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39 / Inside your compu...
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Posted 6/4/15
Women don't necessarily have to.

Guys just have to get a clue and move on.

Just move the heck on, and there's always someone else down the line.
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28 / M / USA! USA! USA!
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Posted 6/4/15
Because they say yes instead.
Posted 6/4/15
im out of here, feminist incoming
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36 / M / Terra
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Posted 6/4/15
Typical Woman stuff. If you accept 'NO' well your just not worth it. But, If you don't accept 'NO' your just to pushy. That being said, some women don't understand that guys like problems solved, for good, not listened to so she can figure it out, but that's another losing battle. Good luck.
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26 / F / South Carolina, USA
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Posted 6/4/15
I used to come up with excuses when I rejected guys who tried to ask me out because I didn't want to hurt their feelings. I've already decided to stop doing that because not only is honesty the best policy, but, at least in my experience, it sent the guys away faster. Of course, I've never had the problems that other women faced when they used "no" and having it backfire but, it's worked for me nonetheless.

PS I don't think you're being sexist
Posted 6/4/15
I say no and some say "oh playing hard to get I see" or "why are you a tease?" So I guess when I say "No" it means something else entirely.....
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