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Post Reply Letting the past go
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Posted 6/17/15
Ok, well, yeah this is a bit of a strange topic, but I've been listening to music that reminds me of my past, which made me think...is it really possible to let the past go? There's all kinds of levels of past, at least for me. I can forgive a lot of it, but some I do keep for myself. Is it better to just let it all go, or keep a few bits and pieces for yourself?
Posted 6/17/15
I think it is possible. There are going to be things that remind you of the past, but just don't let it effect on what you are doing now.
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Posted 6/17/15

kogamii wrote:

I think it is possible. There are going to be things that remind you of the past, but just don't let it effect on what you are doing now.


I agree. Logically, I understand all of it. Emotionally, I'm still angry about the past. I know I can't change it, and even if I could, I don't think I would. It was like getting smacked on the snoot, and I needed that. Doesn't make it easier to deal with, though.
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Posted 6/17/15
A room of ones own.
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Posted 6/17/15

pirththee wrote:

A room of ones own.


Hmm. Now that's kind of a deep thought. So does that mean that in the room one keeps the thoughts of the past, or do you mean that keeping your room should be solely your own, with no thought of the past?

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Posted 6/17/15
Remember it but don't dwell on it. Learn from it but don't keep re-living it.
Posted 6/17/15
Well, you have to know whether you're letting go of the past as a way of forgetting it
Or if you're accepting your past so you can move on
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Posted 6/17/15

Mellowmi wrote:

Well, you have to know whether you're letting go of the past as a way of forgetting it
Or if you're accepting your past so you can move on


Well, it's taken me about 13 years, but I think I'm finally past it. Don't ask me why this one particular thing made me dwell on it for so long. I couldn't begin to answer.
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Posted 6/17/15 , edited 6/17/15
it's really weird for me because i don't think i "let go" of anything, i think i just realized the time has passed and the situation is not relevant to me or my life anymore. i still acknowledge that it happened but i just..... don't care anymore because i learned to forgive myself for not forgiving other people (ex. my dad's mistreatment of me when i was a child) i never plan on forgiving my father, not even when he's on his death bed, and i forgive myself for making that decision. after i did that, i felt peaceful. my dad and i get along now like strangers under the same roof, and it would be uncomfortable if i were anymore emotionally connected to him. that's just how it is.
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Posted 6/17/15
Conceal, don't feel. Let it go!
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Posted 6/17/15

awune wrote:

it's really weird for me because i don't think i "let go" of anything, i think i just realized the time has passed and the situation is not relevant to me or my life anymore. i still acknowledge that it happened but i just..... don't care anymore because i learned to forgive myself for not forgiving other people (ex. my dad's mistreatment of me when i was a child) i never plan on forgiving my father, not even when he's on his death bed, and i forgive myself for making that decision. after i did that, i felt peaceful. my dad and i get along now like strangers under the same roof, and it would be uncomfortable if i were anymore emotionally connected to him. that's just how it is.


I'm glad that you were able to come to terms with it, awune. So sorry for what happened, though. I bear a good portion of blame for my own situation. I suppose that's what took the longest for me to come around to. I had to accept that I was wrong, too, in my situation. I didn't like that, but there it is. It got better once I faced it.
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Posted 6/17/15

streamhopper wrote:


pirththee wrote:

A room of ones own.


Hmm. Now that's kind of a deep thought. So does that mean that in the room one keeps the thoughts of the past, or do you mean that keeping your room should be solely your own, with no thought of the past?



A nodding citation to Virginia Woolf and a space reserved for the sole proprietors sanctum sanctorum.Neither, it represents peace.
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Posted 6/17/15

streamhopper wrote:

Ok, well, yeah this is a bit of a strange topic, but I've been listening to music that reminds me of my past, which made me think...is it really possible to let the past go? There's all kinds of levels of past, at least for me. I can forgive a lot of it, but some I do keep for myself. Is it better to just let it all go, or keep a few bits and pieces for yourself?


I have been in much the same place lately.

The past is tricky; since it is an inextricable part of who you are today, you can never truly let it go. I find it best lately to just cherish the bad along with the good, since each played an important role in where I am today. There are happy memories of events that eventually led to periods of pain. And there are periods of pain that I endured that eventually led to greater joy. And then there is just the overwhelming amount of just plain old boring life.
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Posted 6/17/15

pirththee wrote:


streamhopper wrote:


pirththee wrote:

A room of ones own.


Hmm. Now that's kind of a deep thought. So does that mean that in the room one keeps the thoughts of the past, or do you mean that keeping your room should be solely your own, with no thought of the past?



A nodding citation to Virginia Woolf and a space reserved for the sole proprietors sanctum sanctorum.Neither, it represents peace.


Ah, I see. That makes sense, then. Thanks for clarifying.
Posted 6/17/15

streamhopper wrote:


Mellowmi wrote:

Well, you have to know whether you're letting go of the past as a way of forgetting it
Or if you're accepting your past so you can move on


Well, it's taken me about 13 years, but I think I'm finally past it. Don't ask me why this one particular thing made me dwell on it for so long. I couldn't begin to answer.


There's probably something you look back on that you feel like it could have been different.
It's an anticipation of it and it can loop in your head because you're always thinking "What if".
It's a hard feeling to describe.
I don't know whether this is anything remotely close to what you feel.
I won't pry into it.
There was something that I also felt I was past it, but in this case I was given a chance to revisit it.
Something that always crept up.
I chose to revisit it.
Instead, I ended up regretting doing so half way through.
The past is the past; don't live in it.
Accept it.
Take it step by step, as tiny as you want it to be.
The future is brighter than the past.

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