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Post Reply do you believe it's a skill to keep calm?
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Posted 6/25/15
can you just keep calm or do you have to work for it? that is the question
Posted 6/25/15
It depend in the situation. Give me a reason to be patient and I will.
Omni42 
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Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15
I believe it's a skill. And like all skills, some are born with more aptitude for it. One instance where I had to use it myself was snowboarding in back-country with a friend, found ourselves on the wrong side of a large valley and in our attempt to cross we ended up stuck 1/2way up a cliff on a 2-3m wide bank of snow on a <45 degree angle with 10-15m drop below and 5-10m of cliff above us. We had around 30-40m more to traverse when we ran out of speed and had to go the rest of the way digging our footholds etc. and without any proper climbing gear. I knew we could make it, but I'm not too comfortable with heights so I was mostly focused on trying to get around and keep moving when I realised my friend was freaking out: sped up breathing, moving carelessly and shaking (making it worse was that we had seen the safe area, but when we got 'stuck' it was out of sight). He started trying to think of other ways out, to the point he was ready to just let go and see if he could survive the fall. At this point I had to switch from getting myself out of a bad situation to making sure he didn't freak out too badly and put us in a worse situation. To be honest it got to the point where even though I was quite scared I just couldn't let it show. I was pretty proud of myself for staying calm in that situation. My friend said afterwards that I'd pretty much saved his life there.
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Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15
It can be skill, it can be a part of you. Some people train themselves to be calm, others are naturally calm. That's what I think. I am a calm person and it's hard to make me freak out.
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17 / M / The Bay
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Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15
Its a skill that you have to work at and your ability to stay calm can still vary in each situation. My example will be a double negative one from my own fault and the other out of my control. So let my start by saying that it wasn't my choice to drive, I said I was way too tired and that I couldn't but my father still wanted me too. So basically we're cruising down the freeway in the fast lane, and I dose off and basically go into an unconscious autopilot. I'm like this for a good 10 minutes until I hear my dad yelling. I open my eyes to a car coming head on at me. Some guy had just lost control and was skidding across all the lanes towards me. I don't panic or anything, I analyse the situation then come up with a plan to avoid the accident. I got on the brakes, dropped a gear, waited for a small gap in traffic, then cleared the car. To me the incident wasn't much, not even enough to wake me completely, my father on the other hand was still pretty animated. I still feel pretty proud that I basically woke up and analysed a situation in .5 second. I have to thank my years of auto racing to my ability to stay calm in all situations involving cars and driving. Most people haven't got to experience your brakes failing, throttle being stuck, blowing a tyre at 110 mph, or rolling 5 different times.

I'm not sure how I'll handle in other situations though. The car ability is from being desensitized to all fear while driving but I haven't experienced other dangerous situations that much. I've almost lost my hand and head doing things and was almost rundown by a train and stayed calm but that's about it.
Sogno- 
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Posted 6/25/15
yes

even naturally calm people have to train themselves to be calm

i'm as chill as they come but there are many times where i have just to stop and take a deep breath to calm down
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Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15

byClear wrote:

Its a skill that you have to work at and your ability to stay calm can still vary in each situation. My example will be a double negative one from my own fault and the other out of my control. So let my start by saying that it wasn't my choice to drive, I said I was way too tired and that I couldn't but my father still wanted me too. So basically we're cruising down the freeway in the fast lane, and I dose off and basically go into an unconscious autopilot. I'm like this for a good 10 minutes until I hear my dad yelling. I open my eyes to a car coming head on at me. Some guy had just lost control and was skidding across all the lanes towards me. I don't panic or anything, I analyse the situation then come up with a plan to avoid the accident. I got on the brakes, dropped a gear, waited for a small gap in traffic, then cleared the car. To me the incident wasn't much, not even enough to wake me completely, my father on the other hand was still pretty animated. I still feel pretty proud that I basically woke up and analysed a situation in .5 second. I have to thank my years of auto racing to my ability to stay calm in all situations involving cars and driving. Most people haven't got to experience your brakes failing, throttle being stuck, blowing a tyre at 110 mph, or rolling 5 different times.

I'm not sure how I'll handle in other situations though. The car ability is from being desensitized to all fear while driving but I haven't experienced other dangerous situations that much. I've almost lost my hand and head doing things and was almost rundown by a train and stayed calm but that's about it.


insane
Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15
It's personality trait, and maturity level.
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24 / M / ANIME HEAVEN
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Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15
for some natural born intellectuals its easy.

but for many especially in America it takes a lot of "intelligence" which is uncommon nowadays by my life's experience showed. with me it takes that and a good amount of energy. but if in a fight i become a monster i only once got into one of those but pulled myself out before i completely lost myself Darkness is a bitch
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Posted 6/25/15
It would depend on the stimulus.
Emagg 
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22 / M / California
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Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15
I'm a calm person naturally, but i believe that people may have to push them selves to be calm in certain situations, i don't know if you really can practice being calm though, so i don't think it qualifies as a skill.
Omni42 
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Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15
This was interesting to read. I've been in a couple car accidents too and they were pretty damn scary but I'm sure I wouldn't have the reflexes to deal with that situation, making split second decisions to protect yourself and your father in a car. That said, there are situations that I feel I may be able to deal with better, so I can't help but feel that a person's ability to stay calm in a particular situation has to do with how often and in what manner they have dealt with similar situations in the past. For example, in reference to my own incident I mentioned earlier I'm not sure how I would have dealt with that situation if I hadn't been in similar situations on mountains before, much as your own racing experience helped you in a dangerous situation to make split second decisions and remain calm, I feel that my experience on mountains helped me remain calm and keep my friend calm until we were safe.
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37 / M / Virginia USA
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Posted 6/25/15
For me it is definitely a skill. I have a quick temper, have trouble biting my tongue and work in sales/with the public. it's definitely a skill, whether inherit or learned.
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22 / M / The Cosmos
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Posted 6/25/15 , edited 6/25/15
Everything seems like a skill once you lose the ability to do it
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F / Pennsylvania
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Posted 6/25/15
Calm in a serious situation aka life threatening: Yeah but there is a initial shock.
Calm if i'm being like antagonized: Yes, i can keep calm. I'd rather not spend any amount of time in jail
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