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Post Reply Double Standards?
Posted 7/7/15

Vaporisor wrote:

People, see the punch, but watch before then. He is pressing up against her, them leaning her into bar, he lells, then he grabs her. "Touch me again and I will fluffing punch ya" he grabs her again, she swings. Sorry, guy started from what we see on vid.


Looks like they're both trying to get their drink like their life depends on it lol. How sad is that?
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Posted 7/7/15 , edited 7/7/15
The guy is in the wrong to me

If you pay close attention, you notice that he's the one all up against her, plus he is the first one to make physical contact by grabbing her arm. The guy shouldn't have clocked her in the mouth like he was a damn MMA fighter. It was excessive force;not self defense. If a guy steps on your shoes, do you break his ankle with a baseball bat? The type of force he used on her is for when she's an actual threat, not when her slap BARELY makes contact with his face.

He's an asshole and I'm glad he's off the team.
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Posted 7/7/15 , edited 7/7/15
So, they were both drunk and then this happened. Drunk people do stupid and reckless stuff all the time, what else is new?

Both of them were in the wrong and I can agree the guy overreacted to the girl's provocation and used excessive force. However, I cannot understand why the social justice warriors only point out gender in videos like this and crying that no guy should ever hit a girl no matter what and junk. If the agitator was a dude, I can assure you the so called "justice" seekers would instantly say the punch was well deserved.
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Posted 7/7/15

AiYumega wrote:

Are you extremely masculine? I'm not and I'd say anyone here isn't extremely masculine because we're a bunch of losers who like cartoons.


Consider that a compliment. Implies severe masculinity, and by tangent, extreme feminimity as negatives. I have many traits and interests that one might consider masculine. Motorcycles and vintage cars, Heavy metal and rock, active outdoors lifestyle. By all standards, I am masculine. But I also am here, play dungeons and dragons, read comics, etc. Suddenly, not "masculine". I consider myself a gentleman and think that those who consider "maculinity" and the like to be a be all and end all, well is shallowness to the extreme. Glad to not be defined as such.

Most people are such a combination of traits. The whole men hitting women, and reverse, equal grounds to me. The gender barrier does not exist. I know gals who are extremely tough and can kick the ass of most of the bikers I know. Mental and physical attributes are just that. An anonymous attribute. Gender, genetics and hormones will cause a tendency to traits, and it is irrefutable scientific fact. It does not mean that is how that person might be.

Throw in psychological stress, and even more important. No audio or backstory to anybody here. Maybe was some situation that meant his person was there with friends. The guy pushed wrong buttons. Bump gal and she freaks, only response is, sorry and give space. Same goes for another guy. combat should be defensive. Tae Kwon Do ftw.

Then this leads into bullying and some tragic events when said person being confronted agressively or domineering snaps... Etc.
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Posted 7/7/15 , edited 7/7/15
The guy is a college football player. He should be ashamed that she was still conscious after punching her. But that said, guys don't lay your hands on women, or men for that matter. Same with you ladies. Now if she broke a bottle on the counter and came after him that would have been permission to murder the bitch, but come on, she wasn't after his life, let's be honest. I heard see called him nigger and all that too, but even still, I'd cuss her out but never hit her.
Posted 7/7/15
Still seems like the guys fault imo.
Instead of hitting her, knowing damn well he was much more stronger than her, he could of just stopped her/restrain her.
Yeah she started the fight, but he didn't try to prevent it.
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Posted 7/7/15
She started it, she deserves it.
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Posted 7/7/15
Id say they were both in the wrong. To me it looked like he was just trying to get to the bar and then she got in his face and threatened him which in the end led to him striking back after being struck back so to me that would be self defense but it definitely looked like more force was used than required. I do think both should be charged for attack but i dont think the guy should have been dismissed from the team. Overall though its impossible to know a whole lot without hear the words exchanged so for all i know the man could be mostly responsible and same goes for the lady.
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21 / M / Massachusetts
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Posted 7/7/15
I think this is the thing many people miss when talking about double standards like these. When people point out double standards in how women are treated favorably over men it's largely still a result of gender inequality. When a women commits an act of violence against a man it's not taken as seriously because a woman was the one who did it. Women have spent the majority of history not having their agency taken seriously by a male-dominated society, this is as much the case for their crimes as it is for everything else. And specifically it's bad for a man to hit a woman in society's eyes because women are dainty things to be protected, and men are supposed to be their protectors.

This is also why men who suffer domestic abuse are often the subject of ridicule or disbelief. Women are supposed to be subservient, weak, and passive while men are dominant, strong, and assertive. For a woman to unman her partner in such a fashion is viewed as laughable even though it's really disgusting. While the system is rigged to favor men, I think a lot of people don't realize how unhealthy this rigging is for them as well. It's worse for women of course, but ultimately the system favors "masculinity" over "femininity" more than it does men over women. Ultimately people don't matter to it and men who fail to fulfill their gender role often face significant social stigma because of it. It's considered worse for a guy to hit a woman than a woman to hit a man, this is true. But this reinforces rather than dispels the notion of gender inequality in society.
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Posted 7/7/15
I am pretty amazed at the people saying 'she started it', as if they are not watching the video.

He pushed up against her first, he kept pushing up against her, he grabbed her up and got physical when she confronted him then deliberately blasted her in the face. I am not even sure she raised her arm first, he already has hold of her left arm at 14secs before you can even see her right arm raised, not to mention the fact that she is in the process of closing her first when her hand is first view able (indicating she didn't have her had raised in a closed first prior to him grabbing her) . I'd be willing to bet she got in his face and raise her arm because he put his hands on her. Doing a frame by frame that is exactly what it looks like. He's obviously wasted and all over the place.

He's a piece of shit. Glad he's off the team and I feel sorry for whatever abused girlfriend he has in the future.
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Posted 7/7/15 , edited 7/7/15
Couldn't hear anything, but agree both did something to agro the the other, first she cares alot where he was going and even put her leg infront (maybe to reserve or being na ah you can't come here before me I was first or something)

Also it looks like he was reacting to her sudden movement making him scared and grabbed the first thing "comming" for him her hand (or so it looks like the edge didn't show that well) and it seems like she reacted to his reaction making it into a whole new mess.

Second she raise her fists, he tries to calm her down (maybe not the best way) by holding the fists that looks like she was about to punch him or threatening him with a smile.

Third they get angry and she maybe felt defensless when hold down like that and wanted to be set "free"? (maybe because of alcohol) So she punches him.

Fourth He takes "payback" with more force of what he should (could be hes used to give his all, training, used reflexes from strong male friends?) That would make him not hold back since his not used to that, ending all in a worse state he runs off because it got worse then what I though it would?

Putting on overwatch..
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Posted 7/7/15

dotsforlife wrote:

So, being a bit of a college football sports guy, I came across this little gem in an article.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?t=61&v=hGGdlL5U61U

Now, before you go off spouting assumptious nonsense, watch the video please. It's easy to see what goes down in the video to anyone paying attention to detail. So then, after watching the video, what do you think?

The kid was charged and dismissed from his team because of this. Do you think he was in the wrong for what he did? And what about the girl getting off scott free after being the initial instigator/agressor?

I don't have an issue with someone punching anyone, regardless of gender. (if you assault me, it won't mean anything to me) What I do have an issue with is lack of common sense. Who the hell immediately acts like that when someone is just trying to get to the bar? Also, why didn't the guy simply restrain her and have her thrown out of the bar? He was clearly stronger and this would have been a non issue had he used some common sense.

Both are to blame in my opinion.


Edit: So apparently she was throwing racial slurs his way as well when she turned around.


my question is what the fuck is this 19 year old kid doing in a bar?

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Posted 7/7/15
They were both in the wrong but the guy was in the wrong 10x more than she was.

1. The guy definitely started it. I don't care what he or she said, but in the video you can see him all over her trying to get to the bar. Yes she threw the first punch and probably said the first words, but he was all over her and that alone should get you kicked out of the bar. She probably told him to back up, and he should have.

2. That was not self defense by any means. Self defense is defending yourself, not that. Defending yourself in this case would be like pushing her away or keeping her from punching you. For example, if I pushed you, and you pulled out a gun and shot me, that would not be self defense. That's murder. That's obviously an extreme example but the idea is there that you defend yourself in the appropriate way for each situation. He did not need to punch anybody over that, man or woman.

3. Lets replace the woman with a 12 year old boy. A 12 year old boy vs a college football player from an elite football organization. Does that sound right? I bet the majority of us here would be up in arms because it's obvious that the boy would get his ass kicked. So what changes when it's a grown woman? Not much, and it wouldn't surprise me if a 12 year old boy could be as strong or stronger than that woman.
If people would be enraged over a college football player hitting a kid, then they should also be enraged over the same person hitting that woman. Just as most 12 year old kids are not as strong as adult men, women are also not as strong as men. If we all agree that he should control himself from hitting a 12 year old, then he should also control himself over hitting a woman.

So in conclusion, the guy is an asshole.
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Posted 7/7/15

Stay_Night wrote:
They were both in the wrong but the guy was in the wrong 10x more than she was.

1. The guy definitely started it. I don't care what he or she said, but in the video you can see him all over her trying to get to the bar. Yes she threw the first punch and probably said the first words, but he was all over her and that alone should get you kicked out of the bar. She probably told him to back up, and he should have.

2.That's obviously an extreme example but the idea is there that you defend yourself in the appropriate way for each situation. He did not need to punch anybody over that, man or woman.

3. Lets replace the woman with a 12 year old boy. A 12 year old boy vs a college football player from an elite football organization. Does that sound right? I bet the majority of us here would be up in arms because it's obvious that the boy would get his ass kicked. So what changes when it's a grown woman?
So in conclusion, the guy is an asshole.

Just wow, young boy vs "grown" female where maybe a young boy would have more senses then what she would have (even though both in video seemed a bit wasted)

Right to it was his fault? (would say both but she started a lot)

And coming back to only he is the bad one for punching her when she did it as well? (yes I know he did it maybe quite harder then hers)
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Posted 7/7/15 , edited 7/7/15

Freddy96NO wrote:


Stay_Night wrote:
They were both in the wrong but the guy was in the wrong 10x more than she was.

1. The guy definitely started it. I don't care what he or she said, but in the video you can see him all over her trying to get to the bar. Yes she threw the first punch and probably said the first words, but he was all over her and that alone should get you kicked out of the bar. She probably told him to back up, and he should have.

2.That's obviously an extreme example but the idea is there that you defend yourself in the appropriate way for each situation. He did not need to punch anybody over that, man or woman.

3. Lets replace the woman with a 12 year old boy. A 12 year old boy vs a college football player from an elite football organization. Does that sound right? I bet the majority of us here would be up in arms because it's obvious that the boy would get his ass kicked. So what changes when it's a grown woman?
So in conclusion, the guy is an asshole.

Just wow, young boy vs "grown" female where maybe a young boy would have more senses then what she would have (even though both in video seemed a bit wasted)

Right to it was his fault? (would say both but she started a lot)

And coming back to only he is the bad one for punching her when she did it as well? (yes I know he did it maybe quite harder then hers)


I don't understand what you're trying to say but a 12 year old male and the woman in the vid would probably have similar strength and ability to fend off the college football player. So what's the difference?

And what did she start? Watch the video. The guy is the one who was already pushing his way to get to the bar. He was in the wrong before anything started. And she obviously didn't swing until HE grabbed her. So unless you are saying her threatening to punch him if he doesn't move (when he was already the once starting it by pushing to get to the bar) is worthy enough to grab her, I don't see your point. And even if it was worthy, that was obviously not a grab of self defense. He meant to hurt her when he grabbed her and it's quite obvious.

And yes he is the bad one for punching her extremely hard. That wasn't self defense.
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