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Post Reply When will Hollywood ever learn?
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Posted 8/1/15 , edited 8/2/15
Lets play a game it's called "guess the shitty movie plot"

lets see Naruto is..... an angtsy teenager in highschool who gets picked on by a bunch of bullies lead by Sasuke. Naruto's parents died in a terrorist attack and he lives with his grandpa Jiraya. Only he's not really his grandpa as one day he tells Naruto they are the last surviviors of their Ninja clan and that their enemies lead by Orochimaru, who was also the one who killed naruto's parents, have found them. Jiraya dies when Orochimaru attacks the house and we have a scene of naruto yelling into the sky with his eyes turning red for a moment but nothing really happens after that and the scene goes black. Oh did I forget to mention he has a crush on a girl names Sakura? Yeah she shows up too but is really just a background character for the most part. Later Sasuke shows up again and reveals he's actually Orochimaru's son but wants to stop his father once and for all and joins Naruto.....again Sakura joins because reasons. They finally meet up with Orochimaru who is also the CEO on a large conglomerate which serves as a front for his criminal activities and he reveals his master plan to create a Ninja army to take over the world using the secret power Naruto's clan had been protecting which is a super Soldier formula that creates a fox like aura. He attacks Naruto who is losing at first but just as Orochimaru is about to finish him off Sasuke takes a hit for him to which Orochimaru comments on how he was never his real son and Sasuke was actually a child of Naruto's Ninja clan who Orochimaru took in because he thought he'd be more useful and then prepares to finish off Naruto. Only it turns out Naruto had the secret power hidden inside him all along and he uses it to fight Orochimaru who get desperate and uses his own Psudo version of the formula to gain snake eyes and a lispy tong. Naruto of course wins after a cheap CGI battle and kills Orochimaru. The movie ends with Naruto, Sasuke (Who is revealed to be alive thanks to Sakura to explain why the plot even had her there), and Sakura looking happily into the sky as the camera zooms out. Oh yeah some other characters like kakashi also show up but they get maybe 5 to 10 minutes of lines so they are pretty forgettable.
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Posted 8/1/15

CKD-Anime wrote:

They better not cast white people.

how about "They better not cast bad actors"?

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Posted 8/1/15

Menthuthuyoupi wrote:


CKD-Anime wrote:

They better not cast white people.

how about "They better not cast bad actors"?



It's a live action film, it's guaranteed to have bad actors. Can't wish for the impossible.

Posted 8/2/15

CKD-Anime wrote:

They better not cast white people.


Of course they are lmao
Posted 8/2/15

Menthuthuyoupi wrote:


CKD-Anime wrote:

They better not cast white people.

how about "They better not cast bad actors"?


That's bad actors.
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Posted 8/2/15
Let's not fool ourselves here, they'll cast a bunch of horrible white nobody actors, butcher the source material beyond recognition (to insert all the focus group bullshit that's sure to make it more "appealing" to American audiences), have a pathetic marketing campaign, and make it on a budget of 50 million to maximize profit potential yet still come up short because it'll bomb on arrival



Metazoxan wrote:

Lets play a game it's called "guess the shitty movie plot"

lets see Naruto is..... an angtsy teenager in highschool who gets picked on by a bunch of bullies lead by Sasuke. Naruto's parents died in a terrorist attack and he lives with his grandpa Jiraya. Only he's not really his grandpa as one day he tells Naruto they are the last surviviors of their Ninja clan and that their enemies lead by Orochimaru, who was also the one who killed naruto's parents, have found them. Jiraya dies when Orochimaru attacks the house and we have a scene of naruto yelling into the sky with his eyes turning red for a moment but nothing really happens after that and the scene goes black. Oh did I forget to mention he has a crush on a girl names Sakura? Yeah she shows up too but is really just a background character for the most part. Later Sasuke shows up again and reveals he's actually Orochimaru's son but wants to stop his father once and for all and joins Naruto.....again Sakura joins because reasons. They finally meet up with Orochimaru who is also the CEO on a large conglomerate which serves as a front for his criminal activities and he reveals his master plan to create a Ninja army to take over the world using the secret power Naruto's clan had been protecting which is a super Soldier formula that creates a fox like aura. Only it turns out Naruto had the secret power hidden inside him all along and he uses it to fight Orochimaru who used his own Psudo version of the formula to gain snake eyes and a lispy tong. Naruto of course wins after a cheap CGI battle and kills Orochimaru. The movie ends with Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura looking happily into the sky as the camera zooms out. Oh yeah some other characters like kakashi also show up but they get maybe 5 to 10 minutes of lines so they are pretty forgettable.


Jesus take the wheel, it's not even funny how possible this is.

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Posted 8/2/15
This is all funny to think of but anything from animated from anime to cartoons gets badly recreated Dragon Ball Evolution was one of them but dont forget to talk about The Last Airbender.

After watching Ghost in the Shell Series and GitS Arise I can see how Disney can do the live action movie but the original Ghost in the Shell movie is what got me hardcore into anime.

Its going to be a shame to see the destruction Hollywood does to Naruto but if they do cast it properly even with all white kids no one that is a true fan of the series will be shocked or surprised at the pile of stinky filth the movie will turn out to be.
Posted 8/2/15

severticas wrote:


AiYumega wrote:


FargoDog wrote:


I mean, no one's forcing you to like movies. It just helps in a discussion heavy environment to, y'know, be willing to engage with ideas more complex than 'churned out dross'. It's a reductive, boring statement and says more about you than current film.


Yeah, of course it's my fault. Always is. I am Hollywood. I write the films. I act. I produce. It's me. You figured it out.



I know you didn't ask for it but just pay the guy, Ai.

I keep saying you're a troll but the mods leave you alone. your statement was just bait.


I'll pay him in independent films, how about that.
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Posted 8/2/15

CKD-Anime wrote:



Well Hollywood has given us GitS type movies all the time, so it really depends on how much of a budget they are willing to put into the project; if we get the budget that Edge of Tomorrow got, then we should be fine.

As for Naruto, the three options I see are:

1) Get a Naruto Movie movie - Naruto fighting some Hollywood original character. (Probably the best option)

2) Get a Naruto Series movie - Like I said above, just cram the whole series into two hours, thus skipping a lot of stuff. Unless we have the Zabuza Arc as the ending.

3) Get Naruto Evolution - We get a loose adaptation, set in modern times, about a boy who wants to be the president of the ninja fight club, or something stupid like that.


One question, isn't Edge Of Tomorrow based off an manga series (just an different title name)? As for live action "Naruto" movie, I do like your 2 options. It isn't an bad idea. If option 3 turns out to be DB Evolution type of movie, "Naruto" will bomb out & fans will be beyond angry. But, they can still love the franchise (look at Dragonball. People detest DBE with an fiery passion & still love the franchise). Let's hope Hollywood don't screw things up with Naruto & Ghost In The Shell (I've no idea how that movie's going to turn out).
Posted 8/2/15 , edited 8/2/15

AiYumega wrote:


I'll pay him in independent films, how about that.


You are so moneysupermarket
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Posted 8/2/15
Maybe Naruto will be Black and Sasuke a big Homo.
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Posted 8/2/15
It will be impossible to fit all what Naruto (not Shippuden) had in the movie unless it was like 50 hours long.
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Posted 8/2/15
Naruto... I could care less, I don't really care as long as they don't fuck up ghost in the shell
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Posted 8/2/15 , edited 8/2/15

Rei-hime wrote:

Let's not fool ourselves here, they'll cast a bunch of horrible white nobody actors, butcher the source material beyond recognition (to insert all the focus group bullshit that's sure to make it more "appealing" to American audiences), have a pathetic marketing campaign, and make it on a budget of 50 million to maximize profit potential yet still come up short because it'll bomb on arrival



Metazoxan wrote:

Lets play a game it's called "guess the shitty movie plot"

lets see Naruto is..... an angtsy teenager in highschool who gets picked on by a bunch of bullies lead by Sasuke. Naruto's parents died in a terrorist attack and he lives with his grandpa Jiraya. Only he's not really his grandpa as one day he tells Naruto they are the last surviviors of their Ninja clan and that their enemies lead by Orochimaru, who was also the one who killed naruto's parents, have found them. Jiraya dies when Orochimaru attacks the house and we have a scene of naruto yelling into the sky with his eyes turning red for a moment but nothing really happens after that and the scene goes black. Oh did I forget to mention he has a crush on a girl names Sakura? Yeah she shows up too but is really just a background character for the most part. Later Sasuke shows up again and reveals he's actually Orochimaru's son but wants to stop his father once and for all and joins Naruto.....again Sakura joins because reasons. They finally meet up with Orochimaru who is also the CEO on a large conglomerate which serves as a front for his criminal activities and he reveals his master plan to create a Ninja army to take over the world using the secret power Naruto's clan had been protecting which is a super Soldier formula that creates a fox like aura. Only it turns out Naruto had the secret power hidden inside him all along and he uses it to fight Orochimaru who get desperate and uses his own Psudo version of the formula to gain snake eyes and a lispy tong. Naruto of course wins after a cheap CGI battle and kills Orochimaru. The movie ends with Naruto, Sasuke, and Sakura looking happily into the sky as the camera zooms out. Oh yeah some other characters like kakashi also show up but they get maybe 5 to 10 minutes of lines so they are pretty forgettable.


Jesus take the wheel, it's not even funny how possible this is.


I based it off DBZ: Evolution by thinking about the changes they made the DBZ and applied similar ones to Naruto.

Oh speaking of which I forgot one part. I added it and then bolded it to show it in the paragraph below.

lets see Naruto is..... an angtsy teenager in highschool who gets picked on by a bunch of bullies lead by Sasuke. Naruto's parents died in a terrorist attack and he lives with his grandpa Jiraya. Only he's not really his grandpa as one day he tells Naruto they are the last surviviors of their Ninja clan and that their enemies lead by Orochimaru, who was also the one who killed naruto's parents, have found them. Jiraya dies when Orochimaru attacks the house and we have a scene of naruto yelling into the sky with his eyes turning red for a moment but nothing really happens after that and the scene goes black. Oh did I forget to mention he has a crush on a girl names Sakura? Yeah she shows up too but is really just a background character for the most part. Later Sasuke shows up again and reveals he's actually Orochimaru's son but wants to stop his father once and for all and joins Naruto.....again Sakura joins because reasons. They finally meet up with Orochimaru who is also the CEO on a large conglomerate which serves as a front for his criminal activities and he reveals his master plan to create a Ninja army to take over the world using the secret power Naruto's clan had been protecting which is a super Soldier formula that creates a fox like aura. He attacks Naruto who is losing at first but just as Orochimaru is about to finish him off Sasuke takes a hit for him to which Orochimaru comments on how he was never his real son and Sasuke was actually a child of Naruto's Ninja clan who Orochimaru took in because he thought he'd be more useful and then prepares to finish off Naruto. Only it turns out Naruto had the secret power hidden inside him all along and he uses it to fight Orochimaru who get desperate and uses his own Psudo version of the formula to gain snake eyes and a lispy tong. Naruto of course wins after a cheap CGI battle and kills Orochimaru. The movie ends with Naruto, Sasuke (Who is revealed to be alive thanks to Sakura to explain why the plot even had her there), and Sakura looking happily into the sky as the camera zooms out. Oh yeah some other characters like kakashi also show up but they get maybe 5 to 10 minutes of lines so they are pretty forgettable.
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Posted 8/2/15
If it ends up like that Tom Cruise movie I'm good.
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