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Post Reply Does respect work both ways?
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Posted 8/31/15
It really depends on the context.

In a relationship, if there is no mutual respect, then the relationship probably isn't very strong (this goes for friendships and romantic partners). However, I can also respect the people I look up to without them ever even knowing me.

I also think that there is a difference between showing respect and feeling respect. Showing respect is basically just being polite and treating someone well and feeling respect is having an admiration for the person. I assume you are talking about the latter so I responded only to that part of respect.
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Posted 8/31/15

Morbidhanson wrote:


qualeshia3 wrote:


Morbidhanson wrote:

No.

Start by having good manners and polite conduct. This means respecting people even though they are strangers and may not respect you.

Respect is not reverence. You cannot control how others behave but you can control how you carry yourself. It's understandable to lose your cool occasionally, but the excuse should not be that you are entitled to behave poorly because others behave poorly.


That can make a situation harder. Does respecting a disrespectful person still count as respect?


Yes, and there shouldn't be a big issue there. Respect should be balanced with reasonable actions but I think one should strive to maintain good manners even if someone else does not. It is only when it becomes unduly burdensome that good manners not be maintained.



Oh, I see. I try to be a respectful person. It is hard trying to respect someone who isn't respectful back. But I want to be the responsible one.
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25 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 8/31/15

Eviltwinkee wrote:


qualeshia3 wrote:


Eviltwinkee wrote:

Depends on the person. For example it takes alot to earn any respect from me but at the same time there are people that still respect me even if i don't respect them back.


Are you a fairly respectful person?

Only to the people that gain my respect. That being said just because i don't respect someone it doesn't mean i'm going to be rude or disrespectful towards them. To me people either have or don't my respect or they're in the middle if that makes any sense to you.



Okay then.
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Posted 8/31/15 , edited 8/31/15

qualeshia3 wrote:


_prey wrote:

someones working on a paper




Let's put it this way:
If you'd respected us enough to let us know why you wanted to discuss it, we'd have respected you enough to answer.
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Posted 8/31/15
in theory and from what we're taught in church when you respect someone they'll respect you. sometimes it doesn't . the other person is just a jerk.
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25 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 8/31/15

Ejanss wrote:


qualeshia3 wrote:


_prey wrote:

someones working on a paper




Let's put it this way:
If you'd respected us enough to know why you wanted to discuss it, we'd have respected you enough to answer.


I'm a curious soul.
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Posted 8/31/15

brookline wrote:

in theory and from what we're taught in church when you respect someone they'll respect you. sometimes it doesn't . the other person is just a jerk.


True. It does make me wonder why they're like that in the first place.
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Posted 8/31/15
I mean, as something I just grew to understand for me.
Respect is just something that if you try to be, you will more than likely have it returned. I realize this isn't 100% always true. However I just found it easier for me to deal with issues if I remained respectful, even if someone is clearly choosing to be disrespectful to me. More than likely your argument will come out more clearly, and you will come across as more professional to everyone that witnessed the situation.


So.. if that made any sense. Besides, it's way too much work to be disrespectful and respectful, just pick one!
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Posted 8/31/15

Drkhao wrote:

I mean, as something I just grew to understand for me.
Respect is just something that if you try to be, you will more than likely have it returned. I realize this isn't 100% always true. However I just found it easier for me to deal with issues if I remained respectful, even if someone is clearly choosing to be disrespectful to me. More than likely your argument will come out more clearly, and you will come across as more professional to everyone that witnessed the situation.


So.. if that made any sense. Besides, it's way too much work to be disrespectful and respectful, just pick one!


I try to be respectful mainly because it is the right thing to do. I was always taught to respect others and I try to do that. It is hard when you're trying to be respectful toward a disrespectful person.
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29 / M / Virginia
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Posted 8/31/15

qualeshia3 wrote:


Drkhao wrote:

I mean, as something I just grew to understand for me.
Respect is just something that if you try to be, you will more than likely have it returned. I realize this isn't 100% always true. However I just found it easier for me to deal with issues if I remained respectful, even if someone is clearly choosing to be disrespectful to me. More than likely your argument will come out more clearly, and you will come across as more professional to everyone that witnessed the situation.


So.. if that made any sense. Besides, it's way too much work to be disrespectful and respectful, just pick one!


I try to be respectful mainly because it is the right thing to do. I was always taught to respect others and I try to do that. It is hard when you're trying to be respectful toward a disrespectful person.


yea, it can be very difficult. I was just saying that in the end.. it feels better. That's just my opinion tho. I'd rather just let it go later.
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25 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 8/31/15

Drkhao wrote:


qualeshia3 wrote:


Drkhao wrote:

I mean, as something I just grew to understand for me.
Respect is just something that if you try to be, you will more than likely have it returned. I realize this isn't 100% always true. However I just found it easier for me to deal with issues if I remained respectful, even if someone is clearly choosing to be disrespectful to me. More than likely your argument will come out more clearly, and you will come across as more professional to everyone that witnessed the situation.


So.. if that made any sense. Besides, it's way too much work to be disrespectful and respectful, just pick one!


I try to be respectful mainly because it is the right thing to do. I was always taught to respect others and I try to do that. It is hard when you're trying to be respectful toward a disrespectful person.


yea, it can be very difficult. I was just saying that in the end.. it feels better. That's just my opinion tho. I'd rather just let it go later.


Oh okay.
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Posted 8/31/15

qualeshia3 wrote:

Let me know if a thread like this one exist or not.
Thanks a bunches.

Explain your opinion in great detail.



I... don't understand what the question is.
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Posted 8/31/15

Kitahoshi_Hazel wrote:


qualeshia3 wrote:

Let me know if a thread like this one exist or not.
Thanks a bunches.

Explain your opinion in great detail.



I... don't understand what the question is.


Does respect work both ways?
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36 / M / US
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Posted 8/31/15
When it works both ways that's mutual respect. So I'd say it doesn't have to be mutual.

Also I think we need to define respect as something different from being generally polite or respectful.

If you asking if being respectful should work both way's I'd say yes.

IE: You can be respectful (adj. meaning showing politeness) to a person you do not respect (lack of esteem for their value or the value of their knowledge).
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Posted 8/31/15

qualeshia3 wrote:

Does respect work both ways?


Isn't that a really easy question to answer?

Of course respect doesn't work both ways. We're humans, not robots. Besides, would respect or any good behaviour have any value if we didn't have free will?

I'm not saying that it's good to be disrespectful, I'm just saying that it's human to err. Many people find enough purpose in merely trying to be better than they were the day before, so being imperfect must be an integral part of the human experience.

I think the real faulty thinking is that you are owed anything, so expecting someone to respect you just because you give them respect essentially takes away their autonomy. If I am nice to someone, it's because I want to be nice to them, not because I expect anything back, which makes mutual respect all the more beautiful.
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