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Post Reply Anyone have feelings for someone who hurt you?
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Posted 11/5/15 , edited 11/5/15

Ryulightorb wrote:She was abusive as she never let me have time with friends she would guilt trip me and make me feel bad.
She even made me ditch a friend by guilt tripping me if i didn't.


Did she ever start throwing knives at her own former best friend just because said former best friend gave you a friendly hug?

Or is it my fault for admitting that I used to have feelings for her former best friend?



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Posted 11/5/15
I can relate. My friends call it Stockholm Syndrome.
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Posted 11/5/15

Dariamus wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:She was abusive as she never let me have time with friends she would guilt trip me and make me feel bad.
She even made me ditch a friend by guilt tripping me if i didn't.


Did she ever start throwing knives at her own former best friend just because said former best friend gave you a friendly hug?

Or is it my fault for admitting that I used to have feelings for her former best friend?





Nope but that would scare me.
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Posted 11/5/15

YayForKittens wrote:

Not at the moment I'm not. I'm very happy in my current relationship.

And as far as girls freaking out because their bf watches porn, I think that's ridiculous.

I'm a girl, and I don't give two shits if my bf watches porn. It's not like he's actually having relations with porn actresses. Not wanting your boyfriend to naturally express his sexuality is a very controlling and psycho thing to do.

I would move way on from this chick, she seems like trouble. It's hard at first, but very possible.

Edit: I want to rephrase that since it sounded a bit insensitive. I know what it's like to continue to feel things for someone, but in the end you need to think about what's best for you and what will ultimately make you happy.



Your not being insensitive at all and i agree with you
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Posted 11/5/15 , edited 11/5/15
Feelings... lol.

I know not what these feelings be.
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Posted 11/5/15
this thread reaminds of me feelings by offpsring
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Posted 11/6/15
Never understood why people stayed with someone who practically says you can't have friends, lol.
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Posted 11/6/15 , edited 11/6/15

TrickedMJ wrote:

Never understood why people stayed with someone who practically says you can't have friends, lol.

Love is complicated. Don't expect any easy answers.



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Posted 11/6/15

Dariamus wrote:


TrickedMJ wrote:

Never understood why people stayed with someone who practically says you can't have friends, lol.

Love is complicated. Don't expect any easy answers.



I would just call it being weak-minded, naive or a fool but that's just my opinion. Maybe they could be a masochist though...
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Posted 11/6/15

dotsforlife wrote:


Dariamus wrote:


TrickedMJ wrote:

Never understood why people stayed with someone who practically says you can't have friends, lol.

Love is complicated. Don't expect any easy answers.



I would just call it being weak-minded, naive or a fool but that's just my opinion. Maybe they could be a masochist though...


Love is like an addiction.

You don't want to lose it even if it breaks you down.
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Posted 11/6/15
^ I agree love can be like an addiction. Because of the way it makes you feel...because at first it feels so good, and then you keep chasing that high, even when it no longer feels good, because you so remember that first high from it.

Also, it is about how that person makes you feel about yourself.. Like I am thinking, when you say how you hate her, I think you are saying you hated the way she made you feel about yourself( example, the porn). Usually in beginning of love, you love the way that person makes you feel about yourself, ya know, you feel great , happy inside. And then as some relationships go, they can break down and not be same, and you begin to hate how it is making you feel. Not the high feel good feeling anymore.

You have to be a healthier person to be able to see the signs of if a person is gonna be destructive for you..because yeah, that love chemistry high feels damn good.
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Posted 11/6/15 , edited 11/6/15

Ryulightorb

Love is like an addiction.

You don't want to lose it even if it breaks you down.


Which is why I said weak-minded lol. Not that it's necessarily a bad thing.
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Posted 11/6/15

Ryulightorb wrote:

Curious in my case it's my ex......since dating her i have dated others and fell inlove but i still have always had feelings for my ex as if i was bound to her or something


She was abusive as she never let me have time with friends she would guilt trip me and make me feel bad.
She even made me ditch a friend by guilt tripping me if i didn't.


This girls and i were dating LDR for 3 years i was just about to visit her in person finally and everything went south.

She wouldn't let me as a guy use pornography and made me feel bad for having what i would class as normal guy thoughts.
I had to lie about liking porn and not use it despite wanting to because i hate being restricted.

This damaged me mentally and i tried to compromise but she would never have it as it would inconvenience her.
This went on for so long that i started to believe my own lies i made just so she wouldn't leave me (as i would have nothing left).

So this kept going on she was all out Abusive and i didn't notice it tell my Psychologist listened to my story and pointed it out.

So i stood up one day and said No this is it i'm sick of being restricted , Guilt tripped made to feel bad for every little thing and everything else she did.

I admitted to liking stuff like porn and tried to sort things out and she said "Either you were lying and we break up now or you don't like it" Another one of her it has to be my way or nothing moments.

So i broke up with this girl went on to cut myself (still have her name scarred into my leg) even tried to commit suicide and got therapy etc.

Now i hate this girl as she took everything from me My friends , My time and she took my love for her and used it so she was happy.

I was always giving and sacrificing and she never did something if it would hurt her.




Anyhow go on about 5 months later i fell inlove with a girl and dated her and well we broke up and are best friends because i wasn't sexually attracted to her but there was a ton of moments where this girl was worried for me.

At one point my friends of now said something sexual but funny and i responded but then the guilt inside of me piled up and i went to my girlfriend and apologized again and again (as i used to have to do) and she was like " and didn't scold me and give me shit for something that wasn't even a big deal but i was used to being hated for.

It was at that point when i realized my ex has screwed me up mentally alot....to the point i struggle to even date now let alone cope in alot of situations.


So after all that you would think i would hate her and i do but.....i still have deep feelings for her and miss her and personally it just kills me inside because i just want her out of my mind and life.

It's hard sometimes just last night i cried myself to sleep and i'm not sure what to do anymore

Has anyone else had/have feelings for someoen who hurt them?


I can relate to this story when I was dating my 1st girlfriend she also hurt me and apparently I did was bad....I can't even crack one joke without her getting at me....seriously and she wouldn't even let me talk to any girl I knew........She would always get mad at me for it and always assumed I was cheating on her......I would never cheat on her and she broke up with me half way in our relationship only to find out later she was trying to get with some new guy.....and I was stupid enough to want her. Her plan failed and because she took advantage of me she and I dated again but everyone before told me she wasn't worth it. I didn't want to believe them because she was my first love so I kept being with her even though the arguments kept happening. She kept wanting to spend time with me when I wanted to be with my friends but I couldn't....When we also dated I got use to saying sorry because to her anything I did was bad.....made me cry on my own birthday.....in front of people I knew.....she messed me up mentally from everything that me and her went through but I later met my future gf so from there it was all but when I was dating my new gf I got use to saying sorry for anything due to my last relationship...my gf even told me to not say it because I never did anything wrong....but I never had feelings for my first again because i moved on and found someone who I truly loved but before her..my first ex I remember always wanted to go back to her because I guess I loved her or I was just stupid who knows~
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Posted 11/6/15

dotsforlife wrote:


Ryulightorb

Love is like an addiction.

You don't want to lose it even if it breaks you down.


Which is why I said weak-minded lol. Not that it's necessarily a bad thing.


Well usually im strong minded but....love is my one weakness
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Posted 11/6/15

Ryulightorb wrote:


dotsforlife wrote:


Ryulightorb

Love is like an addiction.

You don't want to lose it even if it breaks you down.


Which is why I said weak-minded lol. Not that it's necessarily a bad thing.


Well usually im strong minded but....love is my one weakness


My love for food is mine
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