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Post Reply Bf//Gf/Sign.Other that says you can't hang with friends
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20 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 11/15/15 , edited 11/15/15

Ruby804b wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:


Ruby804b wrote:

If you're afraid that the person you're with is going to cheat on you, then you obviously don't trust the person at all, so why be with them?


According to this logic i should never date ever because after 6+ cheaters i now fear my SO cheating on me in every relationship.



Pretty much! You need to deal with your own insecurities first, then worry about trying to have a relationship with someone you can trust.


Guess im fucked then because my "insecurities" are a lasting scar and won't ever go away in my life :P.

I can trust someone 99% and still fear being cheated on though and have been in relationships whilst having this fear.

I don't see why i should drop my happiness and chances at relationships because i have a lasting scar that will never heal.

I used to trust people 100% but..i have been hurt to many times to ever trust someone that much again even if i love them heck i don't even trust myself 100%
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Posted 11/15/15 , edited 11/16/15

Ryulightorb wrote:

Guess im fucked then because my "insecurities" are a lasting scar and won't ever go away in my life :P.

I can trust someone 99% and still fear being cheated on though and have been in relationships whilst having this fear.

I don't see why i should drop my happiness and chances at relationships because i have a lasting scar that will never heal.

I used to trust people 100% but..i have been hurt to many times to ever trust someone that much again even if i love them heck i don't even trust myself 100%


Well, I did have a response planned, but you edited the message, so.. can you really be happy with someone if you can't trust them? Always suspecting.. always worrying? If that's happiness for you, I'll just take sadness, thanks.
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Posted 11/15/15 , edited 11/16/15

Ruby804b wrote:

Well, I did have a response planned, but you edited the message, so.. can you really be happy with someone if you can't trust them? Always suspecting.. always worrying? If that's happiness for you, I'll just take sadness, thanks.



My pain and not being able to trust someone fully is why cheaters and abusers deserve to die imo.

I will never recover from what those people have done to me and that's on them and i hate them for it :P

But what can i do? I have tried therapy but it doesn't help nothing has helped ..staying single all my life sounds lonely though...so you gotta make do with what you got right?
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Posted 11/15/15
What friends?
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Posted 11/16/15
I think that some girls are just very paraniod or suspicious or just cautious. Some are very clingy but there's no doubt that alot are controlling.
I get the impression that alot of females dont like being alone, they just get bored or lonley more than most guys do?
And it just seems that alot of females dont have as many friends and/or hobbies as alot of guys do?

I suppose the type of frinds taht someone has could lead to a partner not wanting them going out with their friends, or how often one of the partners wants to be alone or out with friends.
I can unserstand if its every weekends or going out to the city but some girls, even if its just a couple of you at a shitty little empty pub where only males hang out or old men, still constant texts.
One mate of mine his girlfriend alwasy wanted to call and talk for an hour even though we were at a LAN party lol

Eh i dunno, there's a number of reasons and it can go for both sexes.

Funny been thinking and i actually have a male friend who acts alot like how soem felames do. he is always texting me, rings me way too often, if its not a phone text it could be facebook or steam.
Seems to always want to know what iam doing. Who iam with, wants to be included in everything and etc.
lol at times its like wtf? like stalker and probably sounds gay also...
But he just dosent have enough hobbies and other friends i guess. Oh and he dose not work. So he's always bored.

Anyways sort of back on original topic, i think that if a couple are in a fresh relationship or just really in love and/or very sexual i can see how both the guy or girl may want to spend alot of time with each other without friends being around and not see friends much for a while.
But being older, its usually only due to responsibilities and that , as to why some of of your friends or family may be so hard to catch up with.
Not that they are avoiding you, or using it as an excuse, but if they are married or have kids an that usually you see your friends less or if you do they are on a time limit and getting texted constantly.

I think most men like to amd need to spend time with their friends. I can tell some enjoy being at work becasue it gets them away from the missus lol.

Posted 11/16/15 , edited 11/16/15
I think it's dumb. That was one thing I hated about being in a relationship. It's too controlling, but I guess it does show that they care...
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Posted 11/16/15 , edited 11/16/15

Ruby804b wrote:

If you're afraid that the person you're with is going to cheat on you, then you obviously don't trust the person at all, so why be with them?


I am afraid to say..... I do not believe high schoolers have been taught all that much common sense yet. I think that's a elective class in college, I did not have to take it, but I am sure the class would be hard to find a open seat for these days.


fyi, i have been cheated on, but i am SO HAPPY FOR IT.
saved me a bunch of trouble! I mean, honestly, they make it easy to understand how shitty a person they are.

not everyone is shitty, i mean i have had shitty friends, and i have had good friends.

if one friend becomes a shitty friend i am not going to think all my friends are shitty....
if one girl wants to sleep around, I'm not going to think they all want to sleep around....
just that loosey goosey.
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Posted 11/16/15

lukedollo wrote:


Ruby804b wrote:

If you're afraid that the person you're with is going to cheat on you, then you obviously don't trust the person at all, so why be with them?


I am afraid to say..... I do not believe high schoolers have been taught all that much common sense yet. I think that's a elective class in college, I did not have to take it, but I am sure the class would be hard to find a open seat for these days.


fyi, i have been cheated on, but i am SO HAPPY FOR IT.
saved me a bunch of trouble! I mean, honestly, they make it easy to understand how shitty a person they are.

not everyone is shitty, i mean i have had shitty friends, and i have had good friends.

if one friend becomes a shitty friend i am not going to think all my friends are shitty....
if one girl wants to sleep around, I'm not going to think they all want to sleep around....
just that loosey goosey.


Sleeping around isn't even a bad thing. Only if there is an understanding of mutual exclusivity.
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Posted 11/16/15

Ruby804b wrote:


lukedollo wrote:


Ruby804b wrote:

If you're afraid that the person you're with is going to cheat on you, then you obviously don't trust the person at all, so why be with them?


I am afraid to say..... I do not believe high schoolers have been taught all that much common sense yet. I think that's a elective class in college, I did not have to take it, but I am sure the class would be hard to find a open seat for these days.


fyi, i have been cheated on, but i am SO HAPPY FOR IT.
saved me a bunch of trouble! I mean, honestly, they make it easy to understand how shitty a person they are.

not everyone is shitty, i mean i have had shitty friends, and i have had good friends.

if one friend becomes a shitty friend i am not going to think all my friends are shitty....
if one girl wants to sleep around, I'm not going to think they all want to sleep around....
just that loosey goosey.


Sleeping around isn't even a bad thing. Only if there is an understanding of mutual exclusivity.


and i agree 100%, but in that case she wanted me to be exclusive and i kind of assumed the same.
I don't care if a guy or a girl wants to sleep around, as long as they don't deceive others, especially when the other person has cast aside others for that person.
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Posted 11/16/15 , edited 11/16/15
Nothing spells insecurity like clingy
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Posted 11/16/15
If .hack///Sign ever told me I wasn't allowed to hang out with my friends...I think I would get a CAT scan. Yep. That seems like the right thing to do.
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