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Post Reply Manipulation in subtle ways
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20 / F / Fort Worth, Texas
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Posted 11/19/15
Manipulation comes in all forms. Sometimes you can tell when you are being manipulated, but they are so convincing, you go along with it anyway.

Are you manipulative? I can be very manipulative if I think it'll help the person I'm
manipulating, or it could just be a small inconvenience for them and a big boost for me.

When you hear the word "manipulative", you might think of a psycho mother, an abusive boyfriend or an ex wife holding divorce and loss of finances above your head.

But here, let's talk about more subtle forms of manipulation... Recently, I ordered something from Amazon. And of course, I got 2 day shipping(no prime). After being sent an empty package, twice, I just decided I was going to get a refund. They said it might take awhile(why? I have no idea). I got 2 day shipping because I needed the it soon, I absolutely needed it. So after some frustrating false information from Amazon. I went ahead and tried to refund and buy it in a store 34 miles away.

I had a resolve to not shop at Amazon again for quite some time, I was frustrated.

They sent an email saying "they are looking into the problem" and said the item was going to arrive the very next day. They also refunded the money "in good faith".

How is this story relevant??' Well, corporations don't respond or appease if they don't feel you are asking for it. Only when you get upset at poor service or you almost get ripped off, they suddenly wanna kiss you on the cheek and make your heart flutter -- just so you'll buy there again. And it works.

Despite your best efforts to stop supporting a company you deem to be too much trouble, they smile, knowing exactly how to press your buttons.

"This will be free, sorry for the inconvenience."

Than suddenly, you lose your confidence in your decision to stop supporting them. You foolishly(or none foolishly) give them money in the future and they end up recouping their losses from your continued business.

You've been had, you know you have, but it's just so... Persuasive, the way they handle their affairs.

Well, other than crazy/psychotic manipulation. Do you engage in any manipulative behavior? Are you easily manipulated if it's subtle enough? Does a picture of a sad puppy next to a tip jar push you over the edge?(it does to me, fuck those animal shelter guys, they pretty much scammed it out of so much $$$!).

Well go ahead, speak!
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14 / M
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Posted 11/19/15
All my money goes to sad puppies everywhere, I prefer cats actually.
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M / SK, Canada
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Posted 11/19/15
Hmm...
You know, there was a point about a year ago that I got really upset because I felt like I might be a sociopath. But then I realized, if I were a sociopath, I probably wouldn't care if I was a sociopath.

I'm just an asshole because I assume everyone I meet is an idiot until they've proven otherwise. That being said, I still try not to manipulate people... mostly. I actually try to be as open and understanding of people as I can, and usually... well, usually that gets me what I want. But if honesty gets you what you want, is it really manipulation?

¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Posted 11/19/15
I'm immune to all forms of manipulations, fight me.
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F / United Kingdom
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Posted 11/19/15
The best examples of subtle manipulation will probably come from big global companies such as amazon. They know all the tricks to make us think we need to buy stuff when really, we don't. The big brands have clever ways of making us think that brand is the best but really, wouldn't an unknown brand be just as good?

Other subtle manipulations are things that we just take for granted as perfectly normal. Think of all the peculiar habits people have like taking selfies, the ice-bucket challenge (seriously, wtf was that?), all the slang we use and so on. Without realising people are manipulated into thinking they should do that too because you know... everyone is doing it so it must be normal and a good thing?
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Posted 11/19/15 , edited 11/20/15
In a more personal sense, whenever people ask "can" you do something, they are actually forcing you to say yes, because your first response is yes I can do it (even if you don't want to). If you say no, they say "I'm sure you can" (sound nice and supportive) or "You can't?" (questioning your abilities). All the while they sound like they are being nice and not manipulative.

ex: "Can you take out the trash?" v.s. "Please take out the trash."

Since the first is a question, it's less direct so it seems nice and is harder to refuse.
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Posted 11/19/15
you're manipulating me by making a thread about manipulation by manipulating yourself into commenting and also by manipulating me into commenting on my thoughts about manipulation. k but seriously we're all manipulated everyday by media and everything around us, probably even by some themes in anime. But there's good manipulation and bad manipulation. Its difficult to distinguish between the two quite often though since it comes down to individual perspectives and the meaning of what is actually "right"
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Posted 11/19/15 , edited 11/19/15
I don't think Amazon was manipulating you or you need to be more specific with your story.

I always shop from amazon, I'm an amazon prime member since many years ago and they never have failed me except once when I received my cream wash in bad state. It looked like someone opened it and got a handful of it, forgot to close it tightly and sent it like that. The box was full of cream, it was disgusting. I sent them an email with pictures and they responded immediately apologizing and sending me another package. I got it in two days and this time the cream was sealed and in great state.

And another time I bought a $300 mini house for my niece, but this was Fedex's fault. They lost my package, I called the PO and had one of the most incompetent customer service ever. In the end, I contacted Amazon and they immediately sent another mini house which got to my house in two days.


Customer service is horrible in most places but Amazon has always been nice to me, responding quickly to my emails and fixing problems quickly.

As for manipulating, I did it once with a police officer. He was going to give me a ticket for not stopping at a bus stop sign and those tickets get you many points on your license but I literally made the puppy face that's about to cry and he said "I'm going to let pass this time". so it worked XD

Other than that, I don't manipulate anyone and I know when someone is trying to manipulate me. I play dumb if I feel like it.
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Posted 11/19/15
I don't think I'm manipulative but I can be very persuasive. If I really want something, I expect to get it and usually succeed. I'm not subtle about getting what I want though; and I don't try to trick people into doing things.

At the same time I hate being manipulated. Trying to play me is a fast way to bring out my stubborn side and make me dislike you.
Posted 11/19/15
I think there's a distinction between benign social suggestion/influence and a more malevolent manipulation. The former usually just the dynamic of give and take in any interaction which is usually building or staying neutral. The latter I consider it to be an interaction with one of the persons taking away from the other for there own benefit or sometimes because of the belief of doing the other party good, in a way exhibiting a parasite and or virus, meaning that all they care about is their reproduction. For humans that would mean the reproduction of there ideologies or the self sustainment of themselves at all costs, a good example of this is someone who has a savior complex, someone who has seen the "light" therefor has to go around telling everyone what they believe to be the "truth" or the "only/right" etc. So they play on emotions and twist facts in their favor leaving the other party bonded and subservient if they fall victim. This can happen consciously or unconsciously either way it's kinda subhuman in my opinion, and shouldn't be tolerated.

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23 / M / San Diego, CA
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Posted 11/19/15
I'm not very manipulative but I'm persuasive to a lot of my students.
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24 / M
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Posted 11/19/15
I don't think I am manipulative.
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M / The Nightosphere
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Posted 11/19/15
When I am manipulative, I'm blunt as a rock. If I want someone to leave me alone, I wont try to manipulate them into doing it, I just say something along the lines of "stop bothering me, go fuck off and die" except in a much more pleasant manner.
Posted 11/19/15

Nyanotic wrote:

When I am manipulative, I'm blunt as a rock. If I want someone to leave me alone, I wont try to manipulate them into doing it, I just say something along the lines of "stop bothering me, go fuck off and die" except in a much more pleasant manner.


That's more along the lines of asserting your boundaries, not manipulation.
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40 / M / USA
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Posted 11/19/15
I manipulate people when I feel like fucking with someone or if I want something out of it. Don't do it often, but I have no problem doing it.
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