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Post Reply Fantasizing about Death
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21 / Australia
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Posted 11/19/15 , edited 11/19/15
Didn't think you could even contemplate suicide at that young of an age.

For me personally suicide in not tangible, it doesn't make sense from my perspective as existence cannot be compared to the state of non existence.
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Posted 11/19/15 , edited 11/19/15

Dark_Alma wrote:

So... Something has been on my mind for a while. I have tried committing suicide before and nearly succeeded. I think the first time I tried was 5 years old, by jumping off the roof of my house. Ever since then, I have fantasized about my own death, wishing one would come true. Has anyone else fantasized about their death?

If so, is it the reaction of the people around you? What about the act itself? Is it the belief that you will finally be free?

In my case, I just want to leave this world that has shown so little love to me. Do you think it is wrong for someone who's life is utter hell to want to end it? Or do you think the guilt trip of telling that person to live for someone else and not themselves is the right choice?

Also, if you are, how often do you fantasize about your death? I would have to say 7-10 times a month on my end. It just seems so peaceful... I just want the eternal sleep in my life. It seems just so... beautiful I guess.

Share, or don't. Either way, its all good!


Die a warriors death or GTFO. Go join the Kurds and fight ISIS if you want to die honourably.
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27 / M / The Void
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Posted 11/19/15
I fantasize about death everyday, sometimes several times a day, for the past several years, and a few times a year for several years before that; I guess for over half of my life now... Sometimes it's a daydream, sometimes an urge, sometime it's plans, but I tend to do it a lot.

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Posted 11/19/15

PrinceJudar wrote:

Fantasize? No. Thought about? 'Course.

Need to pull yourself together man. You can't fall apart by simply playing video games and receiving a small dose of criticism from another player. Walking is good it stops chaotic thinking. Unless you're intentionally screwin' yourself.

Read Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor E. Frankl. You can even e-read it. I don't fuckin' care. You need to help yourself.

I could sit here and comfort you, but history has taught me it doesn't help. You guys just go at it again the next time you get upset.

Read the book. If you need professional help get that as well. They won't be able to help you though if you refuse to help yourself.

I'm not telling you what you want to hear, I'm telling you what you need to hear. Get off your ass.



I could try and pull myself together, but if Americans have taught me one thing. It isn't worth it. Also, last time you suggested that book to me, I read it. Good read, didn't find much of it applying to my life though.

In all honesty, helping myself is the least of my worries. I got 18 or so years left before I get cremated =p If thinking about my death calms me down and gets me to the next day, I think I will stick to that.

Also, I said this in another thread.. Professional help is so fake. I cant trust the advice of someone I pay to listen to me. I have been to over 15 different therapists over my life and they all say the same shit... and it doesn't help in the least! I actually feel happier when I don't have to talk to them. If I have a close friend I can talk to... that advice is worth 100x more than that of paid advice. I just don't like talking to my close friends about that stuff. They have their own shit to deal with. Rather not share the burden.
Posted 11/19/15
Life is all pointless and worthless, nothing you do will ever matter to anyone and if you die tomorrow people will forget you in a few months if you're lucky.
Sooner you realize how pathetically meaningless everything is, the better you can spend what life you have to suit yourself.
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Posted 11/19/15

GrandMasterTime wrote:

Didn't think you could even contemplate suicide at that young of an age.

For me personally suicide in not tangible, it doesn't make sense from my perspective as existence cannot be compared to the state of non existence.


You would think... but I have always been off. It turned out I had Asperger's... And Americans cant treat things that are different very well. They don't like change.

I used to beat my head against the door until my head would bleed... or jump off the roof of my 2nd story room. High Functioning Autism changes the way a brain functions after all.
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Posted 11/19/15

KarenAraragi wrote:

VR Nekopara. I will pay anything for that. I even become somebody bitch if I can play that in VR. Chocolate and Vanilla best girls.




Hahahahaha!!! I can understand that feeling...
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Posted 11/19/15



Die a warriors death or GTFO. Go join the Kurds and fight ISIS if you want to die honourably.


I prefer not to get dragged into a religious war. I tend to dislike religion.. I have no reason to die for it. Now if I died for someone I cared about, then I wouldn't mind dying honorably.
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Posted 11/19/15

MaliceMalus wrote:

I fantasize about death everyday, sometimes several times a day, for the past several years, and a few times a year for several years before that; I guess for over half of my life now... Sometimes it's a daydream, sometimes an urge, sometime it's plans, but I tend to do it a lot.



I think I picked up my love for dark and earth tone color love from my morbid thoughts. I also got a hell of a dark sense of humor from that as well.
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24 / M / USA
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Posted 11/19/15

Dark_Alma wrote:

I could try and pull myself together, but if Americans have taught me one thing. It isn't worth it. Also, last time you suggested that book to me, I read it. Good read, didn't find much of it applying to my life though.

In all honesty, helping myself is the least of my worries. I got 18 or so years left before I get cremated =p If thinking about my death calms me down and gets me to the next day, I think I will stick to that.

Also, I said this in another thread.. Professional help is so fake. I cant trust the advice of someone I pay to listen to me. I have been to over 15 different therapists over my life and they all say the same shit... and it doesn't help in the least! I actually feel happier when I don't have to talk to them. If I have a close friend I can talk to... that advice is worth 100x more than that of paid advice. I just don't like talking to my close friends about that stuff. They have their own shit to deal with. Rather not share the burden.


If you're fantasizing about death as much as you say, you could very well be schizophrenic. You have to go in when it's this bad, man. It's affecting your daily life, that much was just made obvious to me. You have to go in.

The thing is, the journey doesn't end with drugs or professional help, but it will help you start to deal with it. You haven't been dealing with it. At all. It's time to begin doing that.

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Posted 11/19/15 , edited 11/19/15
PrinceJudar showing compassion!

*Wipes tear out of my eye!* I taught her so well! I remember when she was just discovered crayons!

EDIT: Delete the "was" part, I can be cave woman when I'm typing during a session of Tomb Raider. Silly me!
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24 / M / USA
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Posted 11/19/15 , edited 11/19/15

Magical-Soul wrote:

PrinceJudar showing compassion!

*Wipes tear out of my eye!* I taught her so well! I remember when she just discovered crayons!


You haven't been around much have you.



I type quick and typo often as well.
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40 / M / USA
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Posted 11/19/15

PrinceJudar wrote:


Magical-Soul wrote:

PrinceJudar showing compassion!

*Wipes tear out of my eye!* I taught her so well! I remember when she just discovered crayons!


You haven't been around much have you.



I type quick and typo often as well.


Don't forget the Magi pics. Those too.
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24 / M / USA
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Posted 11/19/15

dotsforlife wrote:

Don't forget the Magi pics. Those too.


Touche!



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20 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 11/19/15
Fantasize? no

Fear aka phobia YES

:( ....but there is a chance we will reach immortality in my lifetime so i can only hope.
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