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In My Quest To Become Japanese, Which Of These Choices Are The Best?
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M / Fort Worth, TX
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Posted 11/22/15
you should just buy some Japanese anime underwear and stay in them for a week
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26 / M / Your friendly nei...
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Posted 11/22/15
Jump off a really high bridge and land onto concrete traveling at terminal velocity. That should do it.
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39 / Inside your compu...
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Posted 11/22/15

PeripheralVisionary wrote:

How do I become Japanese? I desperately want to be Japanese, and I think I have found a couple of ways to do so.

1. Drain my blood, than replace it with Japanese Blood, then get plastic surgery to alter my features to be a pretty Japanese Bishonen.

2. Get a time machine, go back in time, kidnap my pregnant mother, and force her to give birth in Japan, thus qualifying me for Japan Citizenship.

3. Get my brain placed into a Japanese body.


So, which of these three choices are more likely to succeed?


4. Just go to Japan
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46 / M / Bay Area, CA, USA
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Posted 11/22/15
Whether you'll be sufficiently Japanese at the end of the procedure or not is another question, but option #1 is the only one that's actually physically/medically possible in this world right now. Essentially replacing someone's entire blood volume with donor blood can easily happen in massive transfusion settings (e.g. major trauma, some surgical procedures like liver transplants), but you will eventually remake your own blood back and the donor blood will die off. So, you'll maybe want instead a bone marrow transplant from a Japanese donor to make it permanent.
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F / Colorado
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Posted 11/22/15
Can be done today:

Item 1 is possible today if you have enough currency.

Item 2 is possible if the people who run Project Pegasus would allow you to have access to their time machine.

Maybe results:
Item 3 might be a success if you also consider your soul.
Posted 11/22/15
You're asian, so you're already half way there
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13 / F / California
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Posted 11/22/15 , edited 11/22/15
https://youtu.be/mgekmOqCFTU



"Turning Japanese"

I've got your picture of me and you
You wrote, "I love you," I wrote "Me, too"
I sit there staring and there's nothing else to do
Oh, it's in color, your hair is brown
Your eyes are hazel and soft as clouds
I often kiss you when there's no one else around

I've got your picture, I've got your picture
I'd like a million of them all round my cell
I want the doctor to take your picture
So I can look at you from inside as well
You've got me turning up and turning down
And turning in and turning 'round

I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so

I've got your picture, I've got your picture
I'd like a million of them all round my cell
I want a doctor to take your picture
So I can look at you from inside as well
You got me turning up and turning down
I'm turning in, I'm turning round

I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so

I've got your picture, I've got your picture
I'd like a million of them all round myself
I want a doctor to take a picture
So I can look at you from inside as well
You got me turning up and turning down
I'm turning in, I'm turning round

I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so

No sex, no drugs, no wine, no women, no fun, no sin, no you, no wonder it's dark
Everyone around me is a total stranger
Everyone avoids me like a cyclone ranger
Everyone

That's why I'm turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so

Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so
Think so, think so, think so
Turning Japanese, I think I'm turning Japanese, I really think so

I can't believe I am the first to post this......
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25 / M / NYC Metro Area
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Posted 11/22/15
I heard eating pocky, watching anime and using the word "desu" in every other sentence and learning kendo qualifies you as Japanese.
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99 / F / In Your Heart
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Posted 11/22/15
Attempt speaking weeb.
Example:
• change "you" to "anata"
• "I" to "watashi"
• "my" to "ore"
• "?" to "desu ka"

etc
Posted 11/23/15 , edited 11/23/15

There you have it, folks. アナルセックス is how you become Japanese. Find a friend, and hug them, from behind.
Posted 11/23/15

Hrafna wrote:

Eating a Japanese. Didn't work.


I almost peed my bed because this was too funny at 3 am.
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39 / Inside your compu...
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Posted 11/23/15

Mango-Monster wrote:

Attempt speaking weeb.
Example:
• change "you" to "anata"
• "I" to "watashi"
• "my" to "ore"
• "?" to "desu ka"

etc


I wouldn't recommend staring into the weeb abyss, because the weeb abyss would stare right back at you.
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Posted 11/23/15

PeripheralVisionary wrote:

How do I become Japanese? I desperately want to be Japanese, and I think I have found a couple of ways to do so.

1. Drain my blood, than replace it with Japanese Blood, then get plastic surgery to alter my features to be a pretty Japanese Bishonen.

2. Get a time machine, go back in time, kidnap my pregnant mother, and force her to give birth in Japan, thus qualifying me for Japan Citizenship.

3. Get my brain placed into a Japanese body.


So, which of these three choices are more likely to succeed?


Stop being delusional,just move to Japan and stay there for 10 years don't do anything bad then you will become a naturalized Japanese + you can speak Japanese and will look Japanese because of your surroundings ++ Anime center is there.
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99 / F / In Your Heart
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Posted 11/23/15

nanikore2 wrote:


Mango-Monster wrote:

Attempt speaking weeb.
Example:
• change "you" to "anata"
• "I" to "watashi"
• "my" to "ore"
• "?" to "desu ka"

etc


I wouldn't recommend staring into the weeb abyss, because the weeb abyss would stare right back at you.


Honestly, my friend did this and now she's fluent in Japanese. Slowly, she learned for 3 years.
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29 / F / Euro-Somewhere
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Posted 11/23/15

Hrafna wrote:


There you have it, folks. アナルセックス is how you become Japanese. Find a friend, and hug them, from behind.


ROFL
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