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Transgender children
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Posted 12/10/15 , edited 12/11/15

Itsunder9000 wrote:

i know but thats why i asked if you would support them because although they're too young to do these things on their own the parents in the videos i linked supported them and got them special treatments like testosterone blockers and estrogen pills to make them more feminine but theyre not allowed to get sexual reassignment surgery so young because it would make them infertile so they would have to wait to be older to have the procedure done


I don't agree with getting them 'special treatments'. Wait until they're old enough to be sure that they really feel right with whatever gender they choose. I would just do what Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are doing, they let their daughter wear boys clothes and they call them John. No special treatments at all...that's like trying to manipulate your kids to be a certain way and that's wrong because their minds and bodies are still developing. The best thing to do is let them choose by themselves without the help of hormones or drugs.
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22 / M / Arizona
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Posted 12/10/15
Of course I would accept my child. I definitely wouldn't let them get any surgeries done until they were older, but If they felt like they were the opposite sex who am I to tell them their feelings are wrong.
Posted 12/10/15 , edited 12/10/15
I have no 100%, go-for broke, polarized position on whether or not to proceed, but here's what I think should happen first in order to proceed. Not that it is an option for you or your child, there is a lot of fear and worry, and justly so. Its a process, but it needs to unfold.)

My thoughts on the matter are, such as they are, with a young person's identity, and the need to [both} ensure they are sure AND it lasts :

1. I think it should depend on the maturity level of the child not the age. Look for stability for a reasonable period of time,determined by docs.
2. I think the parents should be open, supportive AND use good judgement and seek professional, NOT conversion therapy!, advisement.
3. There is no broad, sweeping, blanket statement for this topic. It should go by individual merit and careful screening by a team of trained, licensed mental health professionals , the open-minded variety, not rigid gatekeepers. Must be ruled out as not a phase and an enduring condition.

In my opinion to come to a reasonable consensus on this subject would be nothing less than a miracle, it's going to always be controversial. In short, its as much a concern for parents for the child as it is a need for the child to be happy in life... Until I'm proven wrong, that's my opinion.




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16 / F / Always my room
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Posted 12/10/15
I would most definitely support my child if they were transgender.
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Posted 12/10/15 , edited 12/10/15

VZ68 wrote:

Antisocial personality disorder can not be used on a minor because their "brain is still forming until 18" but this flies against that as tries to claim kids younger than that know their gender is wrong?

As I recall, the brain (particularly the "Hey, I think this is a really stupid idea" bits) doesn't finish developing till the early twenties on average. The (United States') age of majority actually made more sense in that regard before the government lowered it due to the draft.

Personally, I suppose I'd try to be supportive if it didn't appear to be a phase, but surgery definitely seems like it should wait till they're not at an age where shoving their hand through the bars to pet the "big kitty" at the lion exhibit still seems like a great plan. I haven't read up on it, but hormone therapy, etc. also seem like a bad idea while the body and brain are still developing.

Speaking of the draft, should a transgendered person be required to register based on their original gender, or their new one?
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Posted 12/10/15

iriomote wrote:


VZ68 wrote:

Antisocial personality disorder can not be used on a minor because their "brain is still forming until 18" but this flies against that as tries to claim kids younger than that know their gender is wrong?

As I recall, the brain (particularly the "Hey, I think this is a really stupid idea" bits) doesn't finish developing till the early twenties on average. The (United States') age of majority actually made more sense in that regard before the government lowered it due to the draft.

Personally, I suppose I'd try to be supportive if it didn't appear to be a phase, but surgery definitely seems like it should wait till they're not at an age where shoving their hand through the bars to pet the "big kitty" at the lion exhibit still seems like a great plan. I haven't read up on it, but hormone therapy, etc. also seem like a bad idea while the body and brain are still developing.

Speaking of the draft, should a transgendered person be required to register based on their original gender, or their new one?


You didn't hear?

The DoD/Obama released all roles to females on the same day as the terrorist attacks in California. Hopefully adding everybody to the draft is next.
Posted 12/10/15 , edited 12/10/15
Wait till they were older and then see how they feel about it. If they still feel the same than so be it.
Posted 12/10/15 , edited 12/10/15
I would do my best to support them.
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Posted 12/10/15

Itsunder9000 wrote:

Would you support your child if they told you they were transgender?


Without hesitation or reservation.


I've seen videos of children who say that they would like to be the opposite gender or feel like they were born in the wrong body and even go as far as to say that they would like to remove their male genitalia and would like to have breasts. How would you react if your child told you this? would you support them?


My reaction depends largely upon factors such as at what age they express these thoughts and feelings, the relative severity of their distress (or indeed, if there is any distress at all), and the duration of these feelings and thoughts. If this hypothetical child is bordering on or in the early stages of puberty and comes forward to express intense, lasting distress I'll make the arrangements for a psychiatric evaluation and (if they meet the criteria) allow for reversible pharmacological intervention to halt puberty in its early stages so as to buy them time. If they come forward far earlier in their lives and are not experiencing particularly severe distress I'll take more of a "wait and see" approach. If they come forward far later (mid to late adolescence) and are expressing severe distress I'll do everything I can for them, but some of the more pronounced and irreversible effects of puberty may have already taken hold by that point.

In other words, I'd follow the WPATH standards pretty much to the letter.


or is a child just to young to even comprehend what they're saying?


This is the main idea behind buying time with pharmacological intervention, to determine whether or not any dysphoria is lasting while preventing puberty's irreversible effects using reversible methods.
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100 / M / Boulevard of Brok...
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Posted 12/10/15
I'll obviously support them. But at such a young age they already going through this? I'm pretty sure they're still undecided or just confused. I don't know, I have to be in those shoes to see what adult me would do.
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28 / M / Winnipeg
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Posted 12/10/15 , edited 12/10/15
Yes, but I wouldn't go so far as to implement any surgical procedures. The same way I wouldn't give my daughter implants because she wishes she had bigger boobs, I wouldn't cut off my son's penis. If he wants to make that transition when he's adult, he can go for it, but I'm wary of anything permanent (including tattoos).

As an aside, I vividly recall being mad at around age 8-9 that I wasn't born a girl -- because they were cuter, because they got to wear boy's clothes AND pretty dresses, because I thought adults treated them better, etc. -- and I can tell you any life-altering surgery would've been a huge mistake. That's not to mention sexual preferences (and all that entails) and gender identity are different.

For example, wanting to be addressed as a woman and to look like a woman, but also wanting to have your penis during sex and to have a real child with another woman someday. So if they're too young to even know what they like sexually, they're probably too young to remove their sexual organs.

Playing with dolls? Sure. Wearing dresses? Cool. Dressing up as Sailor Moon for Halloween? SUPER cool.
But I'm sorry, hypothetical son: you can't cut off your dick until you're 18. Again. I am sorry.
Posted 12/10/15
''I HATE YOU DAD!''-Hypothetical son
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21 / M / Florida
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Posted 12/11/15 , edited 12/13/15
No.

I remember myself wanting to be a girl when I was a kid.
I'm happy being a guy right now. Any kind of support of my parents would have had a major impact on my current self.
Like I said I enjoy being a dude.
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Posted 12/11/15 , edited 12/13/15
Hell no, I wouldn't. Until they're shown to be mature enough to be entrusted with important decisions, I'm not going to support them in something like this.

Sort of like if your kid tells you they want to change their name or they want to do something big with their money. I'm not supporting them if I don't think they're mature enough to make such a decision on their own. They'd have to be past their teens, at least.

Children don't know anything. Teens are controlled by their hormone spikes. Once their brain stops growing and I think they're stable enough to decide, that's when I'll give my okay.

I'm not against it. I just don't think little kids should be given the power to do such things. They simply don't have the level of experience or knowledge that allows me to trust their judgment. If you don't adequately discipline and prepare your kids to make at least semi-decent choices, you've failed as a parent. Part of that teaching and discipline is drilling reality into your kid's head and teaching them to think rationally rather than act in immediate response to their emotions.

Hell, I remember when I was a kid and I wanted to do all sorts of dumb crap and had the wrong idea about a lot of stuff. I look back and shake my head. I can't imagine being given the horrible power to do whatever I want. It would've been disastrous.
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