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Post Reply Should Romance be considered a goal?
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21 / F / The Flying Pussyf...
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Posted 12/16/15 , edited 12/16/15

MissKittenVicious wrote:

Why not? Anything can be a goal. One of mine is to become a cat. Are you gonna tell me that's not a goal too?


haha nice goal. I also want to be a cat. A fat house cat in japan... you know the ones with half a tail. when I am reincarnated hopefully that could happen
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24 / M / Las Vegas
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Posted 12/16/15

MissKittenVicious wrote:


endallchaos wrote:

What... Really?!? You have to joking, right? How can that be a goal? Now, becoming a dog is an actual goal.


Now you're just being a jerk. *hiss*




Sorry, it's just that I don't like most cats. I don't know why, though. I just see one, and I get angry for some reason.

Posted 12/16/15

endallchaos wrote:

Sorry, it's just that I don't like most cats. I don't know why, though. I just see one, and I get angry for some reason.



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Posted 12/16/15 , edited 12/16/15
The comment seems innocuous enough.

Interesting... romance as a goal....

You know, one part of me thinks that (as others have said) pretty much anything can be a goal, as different things have different meaning to different people.

However, I find romance as a goal to be somewhat odd because I personally don't believe it's something you can really... strive for.

For example, what if I said, my goal in life is to get a particular girl to like me. Well, then i'm just entering stalker territory at that point. His goal is just to be married and have kids, which doesn't seem that bad, but I wouldn't exactly consider it romance either. For example, you could accomplish that goal with an arranged marriage, but something tells me that's not what he's talking about.

I'm probably not making any sense, but basically I think it's odd to have a goal that you may not be able to accomplish under your own effort, but as I initially said, I suppose anything can be a goal, so why not?
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Posted 12/16/15





I guess I once met a nice cat... Once...

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23 / F
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Posted 12/16/15 , edited 12/17/15
You were at fault... Romance might not be for all, but you should not look down on those who are interested in it. If someone considers getting a wife a life goal then good for them. That is no different from your goals in abstract though from my point of view.
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25 / M / Fredericton, NB
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Posted 12/16/15

Kid2daKrazx wrote:

yeah but it's not like I was saying that his choices were horrible, I just said, I didn't think they mattered, literally pointing out how it was simply my opinion.

Either way, he's not pissed about it because he's like a brother to me but meh, I now know that no matter how stupid I think it is.

It's easier to just be happier that I'm not doing it.


You know the human race would be extinct with that kind of thinking, eh?

I see settling down and finding happiness with an individual to be one of the top goals of life, I mean, the unparalleled happiness of a loved one is pretty important i'd think.

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22 / M / MO, USA
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Posted 12/16/15
I'm a simple man.

My dream: I want to own a piece of land. A bit out in the country, but about an hour away from the Gulf of Mexico. Preferably in Mississippi. I want a sailboat. Nothing huge or fancy. I want a nice place. Something cozy. Not to big but not so small.

I'd love to have a woman at my side, but placing your all of your happiness in someone else, that's not a good idea. You just want to appear as though your happy. You gotta learn to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with someone else.

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28 / M / Baton Rouge, Loui...
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Posted 12/17/15 , edited 12/17/15

KnightOfZero1991 wrote:


Kid2daKrazx wrote:

yeah but it's not like I was saying that his choices were horrible, I just said, I didn't think they mattered, literally pointing out how it was simply my opinion.

Either way, he's not pissed about it because he's like a brother to me but meh, I now know that no matter how stupid I think it is.

It's easier to just be happier that I'm not doing it.


You know the human race would be extinct with that kind of thinking, eh?

I see settling down and finding happiness with an individual to be one of the top goals of life, I mean, the unparalleled happiness of a loved one is pretty important i'd think.



no offense but as a person that hates people to some degree, I don't see that as a bad thing but I do see what you're saying.

but once again, no big. You can have your relationship and I'll just have my books.
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Posted 12/17/15
of course it's a reasonable goal. i've had a similar goal most of my life but now im old and uglier and still poor so so much for achieving that dream haha

well i reckon you have a right to criticise him for it but i don't blame him for getting upset. to each his own
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Posted 12/17/15

pandrasb wrote:

Why not both? I have grandiose goals and still wanna get married.
And I still think getting married is harder, literally think my grandiose goals will be easier. I hate social anxiety.


I agree with this. I think getting married, having a stable life, and being able to have and support kids is a very difficult goal, even if many people have done it, and in a biological sense, passing on genes is the purpose of life. Having a family could distract from other goals, but having a family doesn't have to be someone's only goal and could fit with other goals. Condemning someone's harmless goals in life seems pretty bad.
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21 / F / Fort Worth, Texas
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Posted 12/17/15
I think romance being a requisite is a trait of post modernism gone much too far.

I would go as far as to say romance is in the same territory as heinous manginary.

When you think about it with a clear head. Seeking romance is a very strange concept, many cultures call(or called) romantic love toxic as it had no practical purpose. Males are equipped to love women and children to ensure the survival of their offspring.

Females are equipped to love children to ensure the survival of her offspring.

It's possible to love someone with being in love with them. I think the goal should be the first and the first only, "falling in love" is psychologically bizarre and doesn't serve function. It leads to manipulation, pain and compromises your intellectual thought processes.

When you're "in love" with someone, you pedastalize them and treat them differently than they deserve to be treated. You might start bending principals, you might start bending laws for them, you start to leave objectivity behind and skip down to fairy land where your brain knows is a bad place to be.

This is hard for me to explain as "love" and romance are the same for some people.
Posted 12/17/15
Sure, why not?
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22 / M / Arizona
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Posted 12/17/15
Goals are subjective no one can say one persons goals are more important than another's. You were kinda a asshole, criticizing his goal is telling him his life choices are wrong and that's a very hard pill to try and swallow. Ultimately if having a family is going to make him happy it shouldn't matter.
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48 / M / New England, USA
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Posted 12/17/15

Kid2daKrazx wrote:

So I was talking to this guy and the subject of goals and ambitions popped up. I told him that if I don't make it to Space or at least get a little wealthy from book sales, then I'd like to at least visit another country before I die.

Him, being a bachelor, he said that his goal was to find a lady, get married, have a family, white picket fence kinda bullsmack.

We got into an argument because I don't consider that lovey dovey stuff an actual goal because I see marriages as easily obtainable (if you're financially sound or physically attractive) and have more problems than provide a solution.

We cool now, but I just have to ask, considering the circumstances, was I the asshole in that conversation?


Think about it this way...

1. Anyone can book a ride to space these days, so is it really a goal?

http://www.virgingalactic.com/

2. Anyone can self-publish and sell their own books on Amazon these days. so is it really a goal?
https://kdp.amazon.com/

3. Anyone can go to an airport, train station, bus terminal or dock, so it travelling to another country really a goal?
https://www.busbud.com/en/bus-mexico-city/c/9g3w81

How do you feel when someone tells you your goals aren't really goals due to the fact anyone can obtain them?
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