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Post Reply Your friend turns out to be trans
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24 / M
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Posted 12/16/15
Probably wouldn't talk to them anymore to be truthful.
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42 / M
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Posted 12/16/15 , edited 12/16/15
First of all if someone's my friend then I love them for who they are not what they look like. It's NEVER okay to inflict mental or physical pain on anyone.....period. It's downright evil. Even people I dislike I would never wish them harm. As far as learning about trans topics, I don't really care. I could care less what others do as long as they're not hurting anyone. Who am I to judge? I don't see any reasons to learn about the positives or negatives. We're all human and if something makes you happy then I say go for it. That's all I need to know. It doesn't matter if it's a friend or not. It's not my place to say what is or isn't right for them. Only they can decide that. Let's take hunting for an example. I love animals and I'm an extreme wuss when it comes to them, I can't even fish but I am not one of these persons who hate hunters even though I have an extreme dislike for hurting animals. I cannot tell others what is or isn't right for them to do. I don't walk in their shoes nor do I know what's in their heart and I cannot answer those questions for anyone but myself.

Always be yourself and stay true to yourself. If others don't like it then that's their problem.

Bavalt 
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28 / M / Canada
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Posted 12/16/15
There might be problems on their end. I've got nothing against trans people as people, but I think the concept of transgenderism is misguided. I recognize biological sex as a part of identity, but I don't recognize sociopolitical gender as one. If the gender construct doesn't work for you, just drop it. It's obsolete. It doesn't deserve to be broadened with all these new categories when what we ought to have is no categories at all.

While I keep that point of view quiet around transgendered strangers and acquaintances, as I don't want to offend or annoy people, if it was a friend, I'd probably assume that we were close enough that I'd be able to be honest without risk of getting on their bad side. I can't think of any of my friends who I think would have a problem with me voicing my views, because anyone who's friends with me recognizes that I'm only pointing out what I see as irrational - not trying to do something about it or judge people who participate in it. I can have a problem with someone's beliefs without thinking any less of them or acting any different toward them. The trouble tends to come when people wrongly infer intolerance from my criticism.

Basically, I'd understand their point of view and disagree with it, and there'd be no problem. They'd have to also have no problem understanding and disagreeing with mine, which I'm confident would be the case. But I can't predict other people's thoughts, so there is always the chance that they could end up disliking me over something like this.
Posted 12/16/15

I would still be their friend. If I consider them a friend then that means I like them, so whatever they come out to be that doesn't change their personality I would not stop me from being their friend. I would be willing to listen to what they have to say and offer support. Wouldn't really go out of my way to learn more about trans tough. The same goes for other people. I care more about how they behave and what their personality is. I don't get why people hate on trans just because they are trans....

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21 / M / Around
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Posted 12/16/15
Hahaha jokes on you cause that has already happened to me! Long story short nothing changed between us I really don't care one way or another, it's not like they're a different person because of it, after all we are still friends
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F / Colorado
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Posted 12/16/15
Personally, they would still be my friend. It would depend on them if they wish to remain friends with me. Sometimes people want a new beginning and that includes leaving behind old friends.
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Posted 12/16/15
I have a feeling after they transition they might be completely different so yeah I would be scared of the change, personally i hate change even the smallest things, so....
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32 / M / Floridamned
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Posted 12/16/15
I would clarify our relationship. I can only see myself being romantic/attracted to the female sex regardless of whatever gender they see their self as. If friendship was all they and I wanted before, then it wouldn't change much between us. If I suddenly found out they were a different sex then I would be surprised and maybe disturbed, but I wouldn't push them out of my life unless they were excessively deceitful.
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22 / M / MO, USA
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Posted 12/16/15

Nalaniel wrote:

What would you do? Will you still love them no matter what? Do you think inflicting mental/physical pain on trans people is okay? Does this turn of events make you consider learning more about the trans topic? Maybe you think it's only okay for them to be trans because they are your friend, other trans people are still freaks?


Not gonna lie, It would change things. My best friend and I are close for the fact that we're both very simple men. He's like my brother.

But as a hypothetical, I wouldn't turn him away, he's still my best friend.
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20 / M / Port St. Lucie Fl...
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Posted 12/16/15
So? Still my friend
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50 / M / Chicago, IL
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Posted 12/16/15
Still my friend and be ready to support them. Already had the same thing with a family member. When she announced it, it took me a while to wrap my head around it, but even then she was welcome to our house and a seat at our table.
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22 / M / U.S.A.
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Posted 12/16/15
I can only see myself having a problem if said person made a move on me and it ended up turning into a awkward situation as a result. In which case I've had friendships turn sour because I didn't return feelings and vice versa. Other than that I could give a fuck less what you look like.
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26 / F / US
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Posted 12/16/15

I have a friend who's trans. I asked about five millions questions since I've known him for years, but I've always accepted his decision.
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23 / M / Beyond The Wall
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Posted 12/16/15
Nothing would change. Its not like im trying to have sex with them or anything
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23 / Rainbow Factory
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Posted 12/16/15
time for loving
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