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Is It Wrong To Get Offended If You'Re Not The Target? Or On Other's Behalf?
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17 / M / Crimson Mage Village
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Posted 12/31/15
Morality aside, all I know is that it is fun to watch other people get needlessly offended on behalf of unrelated parties and post equally offensive comments on the internet.
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25 / F / US
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Posted 12/31/15 , edited 12/31/15
Of course you can. There is nothing wrong with defending another person, or even interjecting into a public argument to agree with them. I see defenders sometimes saying "This didn't involve you." or "I wasn't debating with you." No, but you made your statements in a public place and I am entitled to respond.

I also think we should take into account the context. If someone is outright insulting another person unjustly, or perhaps making racist remarks, wouldn't you be offended for them? Should you attack them? No. Can you offer your opinions? Sure.
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Posted 12/31/15
It's not 'wrong' just pointless and possibly unwelcome. People's battles can be personal, a third party breaking in might not be appreciated.
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Posted 12/31/15 , edited 1/1/16

ayaundwolf wrote:

Of course you can. There is nothing wrong with defending another person, or even interjecting into a public argument to agree with them. I see defenders sometimes saying "This didn't involve you." or "I wasn't debating with you." No, but you made your statements in a public place and I am entitled to respond.

I also think we should take into account the context. If someone is outright insulting another person unjustly, or perhaps making racist remarks, wouldn't you be offended for them? Should you attack them? No. Can you offer your opinions? Sure.


I wish the forum had a like button. QFT.
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22 / M / Fraxinus
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Posted 12/31/15 , edited 12/31/15
When the target of the offense isn't even offended, then I'd say being offended on their behalf is incredibly stupid and ridiculous.

Welcome to the world of excessive political correctness.
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31 / M / L'Étoile du Nord,...
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Posted 12/31/15
To be offended on someone's behalf....

...

...what a pathetic, laughable concept.

Some white dude hears about White Christmas and decides to stir up a sh!tstorm and his black friend comes in like "Dude, what're you doing?" then later "Huh? I don't find this offensive at all," but his friend just silences him and continues stirring sh!t up because he perceives it as racist, meanwhile the black guy is probably looking at him and thinking "What an f*cking idiot."

I know that's an exaggerated example, one that couldn't possibly have happened in real-life (otherwise we'd know about courtesy of the media), but hopefully you get the idea. To be offended on someone's behalf would require a special kind of mutuality between two people, as if like a spiritual link (or a psychic one). Otherwise, who are you to know whether or not someone else is truly offended? Ninety-nine percent of the time, you can't, and when you put it into practice, you look like an idiot.
Posted 12/31/15

Gross1985 wrote:

To be offended on someone's behalf....

...

...what a pathetic, laughable concept.

Some white dude hears about White Christmas and decides to stir up a sh!tstorm and his black friend comes in like "Dude, what're you doing?" then later "Huh? I don't find this offensive at all," but his friend just silences him and continues stirring sh!t up because he perceives it as racist, meanwhile the black guy is probably looking at him and thinking "What an f*cking idiot."

I know that's an exaggerated example, one that couldn't possibly have happened in real-life (otherwise we'd know about courtesy of the media), but hopefully you get the idea. To be offended on someone's behalf would require a special kind of mutuality between two people, as if like a spiritual link (or a psychic one). Otherwise, who are you to know whether or not someone else is truly offended? Ninety-nine percent of the time, you can't, and when you put it into practice, you look like an idiot.


I could just as easily say another story where someone blatantly says something racist or homophobic, and wouldn't you want to defend them?
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21 / M / U.S.A.
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Posted 12/31/15

Gross1985 wrote:

and when you put it into practice, you look like an idiot.

Doesnt stop people from being offended.

I'm beginning to think that people are being "offended" just so that they can run around bitching about everything and believe that they're doing it for a justified cause.
Posted 12/31/15

XxDarkSasuxX wrote:


Gross1985 wrote:

and when you put it into practice, you look like an idiot.

Doesnt stop people from being offended.

I'm beginning to think that people are being "offended" just so that they can run around bitching about everything and believe that they're doing it for a justified cause.


Yeah, at least donate money. I dislike keyboard warriors.
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31 / M / L'Étoile du Nord,...
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Posted 12/31/15

PeripheralVisionary wrote:


Gross1985 wrote:

To be offended on someone's behalf....

...

...what a pathetic, laughable concept.

Some white dude hears about White Christmas and decides to stir up a sh!tstorm and his black friend comes in like "Dude, what're you doing?" then later "Huh? I don't find this offensive at all," but his friend just silences him and continues stirring sh!t up because he perceives it as racist, meanwhile the black guy is probably looking at him and thinking "What an f*cking idiot."

I know that's an exaggerated example, one that couldn't possibly have happened in real-life (otherwise we'd know about courtesy of the media), but hopefully you get the idea. To be offended on someone's behalf would require a special kind of mutuality between two people, as if like a spiritual link (or a psychic one). Otherwise, who are you to know whether or not someone else is truly offended? Ninety-nine percent of the time, you can't, and when you put it into practice, you look like an idiot.


I could just as easily say another story where someone blatantly says something racist or homophobic, and wouldn't you want to defend them?

Well, the situation and/or circumstance is, arguably, the most important factor in determining whether or not you should "be offended on someone's behalf". Perhaps the part I don't get is the "on someone's behalf" part. A white person can see something that is racist and call it out as necessary, but what is he doing it for? Does he personally think it's wrong? Or is he doing it in the hopes that people of the targeted demographic will like him? Regarding the latter, there are plenty of people here and there who would do that, because they have personal guilt over who they are and what they were born as, and they think that being self-abasing and espousing some collective guilt culture will allow for more acceptance of their non-white (for example) counterparts. Stuff like that is why I always question the concept of "being offended on someone's behalf".

However, I suppose there are always exceptions. The only reasonable one I can think of is the familial type; if a parent sees that his/her child was wronged or abused, the parent could "be offended on his/her child's behalf", for obvious reasons.
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21 / M / U.S.A.
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Posted 12/31/15 , edited 12/31/15

PeripheralVisionary wrote:

I could just as easily say another story where someone blatantly says something racist or homophobic, and wouldn't you want to defend them?

No. There is a good difference between being offended some of the time and being offended all of the time.

Your examples are usually only complained about if it's a person comfortable with being the latter. For instance, I believe someone mentioned earlier that his gay friend took some heat from some random passerby wannabe activist for jokingly calling something gay.

Like fucking seriously? You and I may laugh at a story like that (idk about you but I certainly did), but there are literally fucking people out there like that. Like come on.


PeripheralVisionary wrote:

Yeah, at least donate money. I dislike keyboard warriors.

Same.
Posted 12/31/15

XxDarkSasuxX wrote:


PeripheralVisionary wrote:

I could just as easily say another story where someone blatantly says something racist or homophobic, and wouldn't you want to defend them?

No. There is a good difference between being offended some of the time and being offended all of the time.

Your examples are usually only complained about if it's a person comfortable with being the latter. For instance, I believe someone mentioned earlier that his gay friend took some heat from some random passerby wannabe activist for jokingly calling something gay.

Like fucking seriously? You and I may laugh at a story like that (idk about you but I certainly did), but there are literally fucking people out there like that. Like come on.


PeripheralVisionary wrote:

Yeah, at least donate money. I dislike keyboard warriors.

Same.


I make an exception for matters not trivial. I was being vague to be all encompassing. Though to really define it. It has to be something blatantly so.
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31 / M / L'Étoile du Nord,...
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Posted 12/31/15

XxDarkSasuxX wrote:

Gross1985 wrote:
and when you put it into practice, you look like an idiot.
Doesnt stop people from being offended.

I'm beginning to think that people are being "offended" just so that they can run around bitching about everything and believe that they're doing it for a justified cause.

Is it possible that there is a difference between being "offended" or being "triggered"? For all I know, triggers can result in a lot of emotional happenings. A person could get triggered and proceed to go on some tirade over something that was insignificant, probably not even offensive....though, this is where we remember that everybody is different. Everybody has different experiences in life, and we don't know everybody for certainty, so mistakes are always bound to happen.
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21 / M / U.S.A.
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Posted 12/31/15

PeripheralVisionary wrote:

I make an exception for matters not trivial. I was being vague to be all encompassing. Though to really define it. It has to be something blatantly so.

Yah well, if this was everyone's stance, I wouldn't consider it to be nearly as problematic as it is today.

If someone's scorning your friend because he's black, chew the guy out.

If someone made an oreo joke in reference to a crowd of people with black people on the outside and white people on the inside, chill the fuck out.

If you're playing a game and you can't customize your player character's hand to conform to your real hand and you consider this a matter worthy of complaint, than you're at a point where you should go take some kind of life management seminar and figure out all the things that you can do with all that free time in your day.
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Posted 12/31/15

PeripheralVisionary wrote:


Gross1985 wrote:

To be offended on someone's behalf....

...

...what a pathetic, laughable concept.

Some white dude hears about White Christmas and decides to stir up a sh!tstorm and his black friend comes in like "Dude, what're you doing?" then later "Huh? I don't find this offensive at all," but his friend just silences him and continues stirring sh!t up because he perceives it as racist, meanwhile the black guy is probably looking at him and thinking "What an f*cking idiot."

I know that's an exaggerated example, one that couldn't possibly have happened in real-life (otherwise we'd know about courtesy of the media), but hopefully you get the idea. To be offended on someone's behalf would require a special kind of mutuality between two people, as if like a spiritual link (or a psychic one). Otherwise, who are you to know whether or not someone else is truly offended? Ninety-nine percent of the time, you can't, and when you put it into practice, you look like an idiot.


I could just as easily say another story where someone blatantly says something racist or homophobic, and wouldn't you want to defend them?


I think you are looking at two different issues here, the first one is defending a person because they are being harassed, which is basically what you talking about above. If a person is being harassed, whether it has to do with racism or homophobia or any other element really doesnt matter, what you are trying to address is the harassment of specific person.

Now getting offended in behalf of someone else is a completely different issue. If you find something offensive that does not directly affect you, you are free to point it out, and move on. However it is not your fight to give unless someone directly affected by the issue is asking you to get involved and you agree with their point of view. There will always be a person that will be offended by another person's actions, no matter what the action is.

For example, during Halloween there was this article about how this child was dressed as Pablo Escobar and it was offensive towards Colombians. I am Colombian and i grew up in Colombia during the Escobar days and lived the direct aftermath. I have yet to speak with another Colombian that believed this costume issue was offensive. Yet for some reason a bunch of people who probably could not point to Colombia on a map and have no direct connection to any Colombian felt the costume was offensive, so the idea that it was blatantly offensive to Colombians is simply inaccurate.
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