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Post Reply do any of you have siblings or half siblings ?
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22 / F
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Posted 4/2/16
do any of you have siblings or half siblings that you are not in touch with, and that they probably don't know about you?
my father was abusive to my mom and I so he hasn't been in my life since I was 3
he went on to marry someone else and had a son and daughter, right now they would be 8 years old, I am 21
so of course they would not have a facebook or anything
I do not think he is married to that woman anymore either
how and when would I try to contact them? them as in my siblings.
should I even try? I mean it is going to eat away at me my whole life knowing this..
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Posted 4/2/16
I probably wouldn't bother, or let it bother you. If in 10 years or so, you still find it eating at you, then I guess you can talk to a professional about the whole thing.
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24 / F / United States, DE
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Posted 4/2/16
Maybe wait until they are a bit older and then reach out. It might be easier to relate with them when they are adults as well.

I have two half sisters who are older than me from my dad's first marriage. I'm not super close with them, but I see them from time to time.
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22 / F
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Posted 4/2/16

YayForKittens wrote:

Maybe wait until they are a bit older and then reach out. It might be easier to relate with them when they are adults as well.

I have two half sisters who are older than me from my dad's first marriage. I'm not super close with them, but I see them from time to time.


thing is, HOW would I reach out? what if they change their last name,
I do I go about doing it
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23 / M / AZ
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Posted 4/2/16
Nope,
If I did my mother would have left my dad a long time ago
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18 / M
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Posted 4/2/16
I do apparently. Only heard about it a couple weeks ago actually.

Basically, they got a fertilized egg from my parents (dads sperm, moms egg) and then they froze that egg. Then they deposit it into another woman so that she can carry the baby and make it her own, usually a woman who normally cannot get pregnant. So now there are two kids out there that look quite similar to me and my actual brother. We are both 18 while the other kids are I think 7 and 10.

My mom showed us pictures of them. God its freaky to look at. They look liked us but someone just changed some attributes of my face and stuff.
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Posted 4/2/16 , edited 4/2/16
I've got half siblings as well as full siblings. Father (older than mother) had been married with 3 daughters and divorced before he met my mother. After another failed marriage with mother then she met step-father (much much older than mother) who had had a son from a previous relationship but we never met him since the son was already full grown and starting his own family. Step-father was hush hush about him because he'd lied to mother about his age and the son's age would expose this. I'm curious to meet the older sisters. I suppose I will meet the older step brother at some point now that step-father has died.
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34 / F / The Bahamas
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Posted 4/2/16
I have have three half-siblings that I am estranged from since the eldest one lied to me about the third (who is younger than me), and the middle would only ever call to bum money from our dad.
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22 / M / The Caribbean
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Posted 4/2/16
I have three half sibling.
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23 / M / Abyss
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Posted 4/2/16
Kind of. I had a step-grandma and step grandpa that I was never aware I had (my grandmas sister and her husband). I didn't know they existed until my grandma kicked the bucket. Aunt Joan (what she wants us to call her) decided she wanted to meet up with us once she heard her sister died.

I can say I am happy I got to meet them. They are a blast.
Posted 4/2/16 , edited 4/3/16
I have one half brother who feels kinda like a real brother to me. I never knew his dad but from what I heard he was a pretty shitty husband so..
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Posted 4/2/16
I do have a sibling or siblings. I have a possible half sibling half way around the world.
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31 / F / Switzerland/USA
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Posted 4/2/16
I have a younger brother
Posted 4/3/16 , edited 4/3/16
I have two siblings and two half-siblings. I'm not that close to my half-siblings but we talk sometimes. My mom is the wife and my half-siblings were from my dad's younger years. We're civil with each other and in terms of inheritance I'll surely give them their lawful share (I'm the one expected to settle legal matters since I'm the "eldest" and it's what I study).

I personally think you shouldn't just show up and introduce yourself as their sister. It will definitely shock your siblings (unless your dad told them about you). It happened to me.

Before they were going to move to another country, dad introduced them to us as his god daughters. But I found out later they were actually his daughters. It bothered me for quite some time. I was a teenager when I found out, so I had a lot of drama going on. I did not tell my parents I knew. Because if they found out that I knew, I would have to face that reality. I didn't want to shatter the image I had for my "perfect" family. I wanted to ignore that reality. But gradually I learned to accept the fact. Still, I'm indifferent about the situation.

If you really want to meet them, maybe you can call your dad and ask if you can meet your siblings? That way they won't be that surprised (since your dad or their mom can properly explain the situation to them). Or if your siblings aren't living with your dad anymore, try to call their mom maybe? It's nice to have younger siblings. In my case I have older half-sisters so it's kind of boring for me since we don't share the same interests.
jr0b 
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Posted 4/3/16

shureyuuki wrote:

I have two siblings and two half-siblings. I'm not that close to my half-siblings but we talk sometimes. My mom is the wife and my half-siblings were from my dad's younger years. We're civil with each other and in terms of inheritance I'll surely give them their lawful share (I'm the one expected to settle legal matters since I'm the "eldest" and it's what I study).

I personally think you shouldn't just show up and introduce yourself as their sister. It will definitely shock your siblings (unless your dad told them about you). It happened to me.

Before they were going to move to another country, dad introduced them to us as his god daughters. But I found out later they were actually his daughters. It bothered me for quite some time. I was a teenager when I found out, so I had a lot of drama going around. I did not tell my parents I knew. Because if they found out that I knew, I would have to face that reality. I didn't want to shatter the image I had for my "perfect" family. I wanted to ignore that reality. But gradually I learned to accept the fact. Still, I'm indifferent about the situation.

If you really want to meet them, maybe you can call your dad and ask if you can meet your siblings? That way they won't be that surprised (since your dad or their mom can properly explain the situation to them). Or if your siblings aren't living with your dad anymore, try to call their mom maybe? It's nice to have younger siblings. In my case I have older half-sisters so it's kind of boring for me since we don't share the same interests.


I hear this a lot, can you explain this "perfect family" thing? No sarcasm. My family is very non-traditional. lol.
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