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Post Reply Would you say yes?
Posted 4/14/16 , edited 4/14/16
Let's say you're in a relationship with someone who wants to get married. You've told them you aren't ready for marriage. One day when you're at their family's house for dinner. At this dinner they pop the question in front of their family.
Personally I would have to say no. I would look like the bad guy but I'm not going to be trapped like that.
Do you say yes?
What happens next?


EDIT
You guys talk almost as if you actually think I'm in a situation like this. That's kind of the vibe I'm getting here (I could be wrong). This is not the case.
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25 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 4/14/16
Then don't date someone who wants to get married quickly.
Posted 4/14/16
Tell them you're not ready.
qwueri 
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30 / M
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Posted 4/14/16
Pressuring in front of their family after stating you're not ready? That's a big no.
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21 / M / Canada
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Posted 4/14/16
Stick to your guns and say no! Besides, if you have already said you aren't ready they need to respect that and not pressure you. A further discussion about future commitments between the couple may help quell any urgent need for marriage.
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33 / F / My own little realm.
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Posted 4/14/16
you more than likely of heard this a few times but If your not ready well then your not ready, if they REALLY care for you they'll respect your wishes. If they keep briing it up over and over and over... you get the idea well then I think you should get out of that relationship PDQ (Pretty Damn Quick) before things get out of hand
Posted 4/14/16
Lol no shut up you big idiot xDDD
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22 / F / United States
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Posted 4/14/16
If I weren't ready for marriage and they popped the question, I would say no to them. If they get angry or upset, then that's their fault for not listening the first time. In a relationship. there should be an equal amount of respect and acceptance.
Posted 4/14/16

Hail_King_Kakao wrote:

Lol no shut up you big idiot xDDD


Ohhhh... That's a good approach. Play it up like a joke. Veeeery Niiiice.
Posted 4/14/16

ZavinRoyalheart wrote:

Ohhhh... That's a good approach. Play it up like a joke. Veeeery Niiiice.


Yeah and then beat him up when we're back home >:C
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30 / M
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Posted 4/14/16
I don't particularly wish to be married. However, if I were in a long-term relationship serious enough that my partner desired it, I'd probably cave at some point unless I already wanted to end the relationship.If she's desperate enough to ask me in front of her family/friends I'd probably just bow to the inevitable.

But then, I'm getting old.. I feel like my wild oats are rather thoroughly sown at this point.
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46 / F / Reston, VA, USA
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Posted 4/14/16
I've had at least three proposals I turned down, luckily none of them were "public" proposals in front of family or on screen at the ball game or anything like that.

However, even if it were a public proposal I'd have said, "No." in all three cases. You should be aware that once you turn down a proposal that your relationship with that individual will change. In fact, it is highly unlikely that they will continue to have a relationship with you. Saying "no" to a proposal is basically interpreted as breaking up with that individual even if that is not how you want it to be.

You can expect the relationship to basically peter out as they move on to find someone who has the same desire for marriage that they have.
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20 / Cold and High
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Posted 4/14/16

otaku4life_19 wrote:
In a relationship. there should be an equal amount of respect and acceptance.
what if they would think they stop such a "progress" that they think that is also little respect given or accptance to their wish.. even though that can be selfish unless both agreed.
Now just make babies with her (even though you said "I am not ready for such a thing") then give her the babies and say "are you ready now!" while running off into the distance on a rainbow.. MGTOW!

Razor_Girl wrote:
I've had at least three proposals I turned down, luckily none of them were "public" proposals in front of family or on screen at the ball game or anything like that.
Could we make that 4?

Would you Marry Me?
Me!Me!Me!

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F / Pennsylvania
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Posted 4/14/16

qualeshia3 wrote:

Then don't date someone who wants to get married quickly.

You don't always know what a persons long term goals are especially now a days. I was in a relationshion with someone, we were dating for over a year before i finally figured out that to this person not only were we NOT a couple, to them we weren't even dating we were "Hanging out" I stayed with this person for 4 months after they told me this. why did I finally just cut them out of my life cold turkey when they said, and i quote "Even if me and you were married that would't stop me from leaving you or anybody else" ??!!?!?!?!?! byeeeeeeeeeee


As for someone using peer pressure to get me to say yes to marriage if they fully knew that i didn't want it, i told them multiple times that i didn't want to and then they do some "fuckery" infront of there family i'd DEF say yes and then the moment we leave curse them out, just because i said yes infront of your family doesn't meat that i can't "change" my mind the second we leave
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Posted 4/14/16
I would still say no. Then I would explain to them and the reason why I said no.
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