Created by qualeshia3
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Post Reply Is people pleasing an annoying trait to have?
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26 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 4/26/16
Let me know if a thread like this one exist or not.
Thanks a bunches.

So, is people pleasing an annoying trait to have? Are you a people pleaser? Why do some people feel the need to please others so badly?


Enjoy!!!
Posted 4/26/16 , edited 4/28/16
It depends on whether the person's actions are negatively directed to others while they are pleasing the people they want to please. I couldn't care less if people scrub other people's shoes till the very tips of their shoes are shiny as fuck. But if they are trying to put another person down in the process or are aiming to take from them their emotional and physical needs, then yes, I find them annoying and they're going to deal with me.

I understand their desire for it, but pleasing someone else does not require hurting another person.

In summary, it really depends on the situation. In general I don't think it's a bad thing to do. Sometimes it's just a habit you've picked up and it's become a part of who you are.
Posted 4/26/16 , edited 4/28/16
Yes it's annoying
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16 / F / Always my room
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Posted 4/26/16 , edited 4/28/16
Sometimes it can be but at the same time I appreciate that all they want to do is help
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24 / F / United States, DE
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Posted 4/26/16 , edited 4/28/16
Not unless they do it just to kiss ass all the time.

If you just like to make people happy, there's nothing wrong with that.
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8500 / F / Apollo...
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Posted 4/26/16 , edited 4/28/16
It's annoying to be on both ends of asskissing.

It's even more annoying when it's obvious that it's forced.

Just do you.
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24 / F / Johnstown, PA, USA
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Posted 4/26/16 , edited 4/28/16
Yes, it can be, especially when the "people-pleaser" also has passive-aggressive and self-victimization traits. This mixture commonly results in someone who throws tantrums whenever they can't please someone, or whenever they think they can't. And then bitches about "it always being my fault" whenever things don't go their way. Like a snotty little kid. My stepdad is one of those. I sometimes want to strangle and bitch-slap him. He literally tries to paint himself like some kind of tragic heroine. Fortunately, most people-pleasers aren't nearly as obnoxious. Usually, I simply wish to explain to people-pleasers that they cannot make everyone happy. It's a potentially self-destructive trait.
Posted 4/26/16 , edited 4/28/16
No. I treat people well because I like to.
You should treat people well if you want them to treat you well.

Good grief. I hope you guys don't feel that way about me. This is just me. I don't do it to kiss butt. It's just the right thing to do. I like it when people help me too.
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26 / F / New Jersey, USA
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Posted 4/27/16 , edited 4/28/16
Great comments.
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21 / Australia
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Posted 4/27/16 , edited 4/28/16
I don't know; I probably do it.
Posted 4/27/16 , edited 4/28/16
Yes.

People need to learn not to give a shit about what other people think of them.
Posted 4/27/16 , edited 4/28/16
Some of the worst shit. I can tell you are a boot licker without you opening your mouth. Save the air it takes for you to verbally confirm this and bend over.
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M / Canada
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Posted 4/28/16 , edited 4/28/16

ZavinRoyalheart wrote:
You should treat people well if you want them to treat you well.

Exactly what I think too. But when people are pleasing others just to get something in return, it becomes annoying.

So this is why I chose "maybe", which in that case means "sometimes yes, sometimes no".
Posted 4/28/16 , edited 4/28/16

the_krock wrote:


ZavinRoyalheart wrote:
You should treat people well if you want them to treat you well.

Exactly what I think too. But when people are pleasing others just to get something in return, it becomes annoying.

So this is why I chose "maybe", which in that case means "sometimes yes, sometimes no".


I'm bad with words. What I'm really trying to get at is the golden rule. Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.
I don't expect anything in return for good deeds. It's nice to have though.
Posted 4/28/16 , edited 4/28/16
I aim to please yeah
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