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Post Reply Favoring the first child
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Posted 5/30/16
I just hear a shit ton of whining about how shitty your childhoods were.

Some people dealt with real problems like abuse and neglect, rather than favoritism.

Also, I think parents pick favorites for other reasons than because of order of birth. Perhaps your sibling is better looking, smarter, or less trouble. As long as your parents are treating you well, in accordance with the law....get over it.
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16 / F / Always my room
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Posted 5/30/16
As the oldest sibling I don't think this is true, I have always thought that my youngest sibling was favored the most.
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It doesn't matter.
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Posted 5/31/16

FlyinDumpling wrote:


Sir_jamesalot wrote:

OP, run home to your parents and complain to them.
Not me.
sound like you're complaining


You missed the point.
You should complain to the ones that are the cause.
If you say I'm complaining to you and about you then I'm not being a hypocrite.
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17 / M / Wales - That coun...
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Posted 5/31/16
My older sister is much more adored by my parents. I don't spend as much time with them than her so I kinda see why.
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20 / M / Bundaberg, Queens...
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Posted 5/31/16

stars201 wrote:

It is the opposite for me. Being the oldest, I'm more like the Guinea pig; a test subject so that they'll know what NOT to do with the next one which would be my younger sibling, who is their favourite.


...they must have learnt alot
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Posted 5/31/16
As the first child I can't really tell if I am favoured. It seems like my parents love us equally. Favouring seems weird to me.
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Posted 5/31/16
Favoritism is normal, whether you're the eldest who had all the medical problems, the middle child who was spoiled rotten for being the only grandbaby of that make and model, or the youngest who felt left out despite being constantly encouraged to succeed at whatever they set out to do.
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Posted 5/31/16

HolyDrumstick wrote:

I just hear a shit ton of whining about how shitty your childhoods were.

Some people dealt with real problems like abuse and neglect, rather than favoritism.

Also, I think parents pick favorites for other reasons than because of order of birth. Perhaps your sibling is better looking, smarter, or less trouble. As long as your parents are treating you well, in accordance with the law....get over it.


I don't think talking about favouritism is necessarily whining. That all depends on how you talk about it. It happens and that doesn't necessarily mean childhood will bad.

Regarding those dealing with abuse sometimes favouritism determines who get abused or not. There's even those who get scapegoated in families and made the target of abuse so in some cases favouritism is a valid reason to bring up.
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Posted 5/31/16
It's not always the first child that is the favorite. There are many cases where the second, third, etc. is the favorite. Sometimes that favoritism is decided by gender preference, others simply by the child's health or personality,
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Posted 5/31/16
Nope, I'm the youngest and I was fortunate enough to have a mom that loves the baby more. Even though I'm the screwed up one my mom loves me more. So take that brother....nyah nyah!

I really don't think that most mom's (parents) love one or the other more. On one hand there's going to always be something special about the first child they ever had but by the time the next kid comes around they're more experienced parents and can do an even better job with you and any other siblings that may be born. Second and thirds and all the rest benefit from all the lessons learned from the first child. For instance, I didn't get dropped on my head the way my brother did lol.
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Posted 5/31/16 , edited 10/13/16
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Posted 5/31/16 , edited 5/31/16
most all animals follow this behavior.
humans like to separate themselves from the animal kingdom but many of those same traits are still within us. we just pretend otherwise....

the youngest are always the most burden upon the older which have a better have a better chance of surviving. if things aren't working exactly right.. they get the boot first.

with humans its more just a total disregard for the youngest. more resource is expended on the older.

I call this "baby bird syndrome" most people cannot acknowledge it unless they were on the bottom tier. and even then perhaps not because it really is one of the darkest aspects

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Posted 5/31/16

Sir_jamesalot wrote:

You missed the point.
You should complain to the ones that are the cause.
If you say I'm complaining to you and about you then I'm not being a hypocrite.
and you missed the point of this thread which I so kindly summarized for you in the 1st line. I think you should complain to the ones who can solve your non issues. Like mod
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Somewhere
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Posted 5/31/16
I'm an only child.....well technically I have a step sister that I've never met.
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23 / F / Your Cookie Jar
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Posted 5/31/16
I don't think so.

I have an older brother and my mom pretty much favored him but my dad favored me so it didn't matter much. I know when my younger brother was born my mom seemed to favor him more than me so I just thought it was a "momma's boy" kind of thing. Although when we got older my mom started to treat me and my younger brother equally. But as for my older brother, he doesn't talk to our mom anymore because he became this lady's b*tch.
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