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Post Reply How do you stop from being boring?
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Posted 6/6/16
There's irony here. Irony everywhere. We've struck the mother lode.
qwueri 
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Posted 6/6/16
Out of curiosity, are you talking to people about things they aren't particularly interested in? One way conversations aren't fun.
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Posted 6/6/16

qwueri wrote:

Out of curiosity, are you talking to people about things they aren't particularly interested in? One way conversations aren't fun.


No just about how there days is and what they are up to and what's going on then when they tell me for example they are playing x game i will talk to them about it with them.

I try my best to keep my friends entertained
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Posted 6/6/16


The problem, if not the solution, has become... um... clear. Ish. It may be a good idea for you to take some time apart from your 'friends', yes.
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Posted 6/6/16

gornotck wrote:



The problem, if not the solution, has become... um... clear. Ish. It may be a good idea for you to take some time apart from your 'friends', yes.


probably they obviously aren't good friends if they leave without a word...
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Posted 6/6/16 , edited 6/6/16
I don't do anything. I'm okay with being boring. I know that friends are temporary and so there is no expectation on my part that people stick around. I'm content with doing what I want whether that be alone or with others. Why the fuck should I care if I'm entertaining or not?



P.S. If you're anything like me you probably stopped messaging them. It's a two way street.
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Posted 6/6/16

PrinceJudar wrote:

I don't do anything. I'm okay with being boring. I know that friends are temporary and so there is no expectation on my part that people stick around. I'm content with doing what I want whether that be alone or with others. Why the fuck should I care if I'm entertaining or not?



P.S. If you're anything like me you probably stopped messaging them. It's a two way street.


"i know that friends are temporary"

That's why i probably should be more picky with my friends...i only let the ones who i know won't be temporary for the most part to get to know me the most
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Posted 6/6/16

Ryulightorb wrote:

"i know that friends are temporary"

That's why i probably should be more picky with my friends...i only let the ones who i know won't be temporary for the most part to get to know me the most


It's an inevitable road of disappointment.

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Posted 6/6/16

PrinceJudar wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:

"i know that friends are temporary"

That's why i probably should be more picky with my friends...i only let the ones who i know won't be temporary for the most part to get to know me the most


It's an inevitable road of disappointment.



so just be friendless xD? if they are temporary they arent worth knowing well imo
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Posted 6/6/16
Try being interesting.
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Posted 6/6/16 , edited 6/6/16
it doesnt matter if your "boring" people will always come in and out of your life. if you want to be more "interseting" start asking questions about them instead of it being a one way conversation, LET IT FLOW , LET IT FLOW
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Posted 6/6/16

Ryulightorb wrote:

so just be friendless xD? if they are temporary they arent worth knowing well imo

Not necessarily. People are friends because they enjoy each other's company in one form or another. It can be for a list of reasons: perhaps comfort, understanding, or entertainment. Sometimes it's a matter of days, but it can be for months or years. Spending time with other people versus alone can be a worthwhile endeavor depending on what you want. People only stick around so long as it is beneficial to them. If you can no longer offer what they want--they move on. It's not magical.

Either change what you're offering or find someone new that wants what you are offering. No sense in getting depressed over it.

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Posted 6/6/16

PrinceJudar wrote:


Ryulightorb wrote:

so just be friendless xD? if they are temporary they arent worth knowing well imo

Not necessarily. People are friends because they enjoy each other's company in one form or another. It can be for a list of reasons: perhaps comfort, understanding, or entertainment. Sometimes it's a matter of days, but it can be for months or years. Spending time with other people versus alone can be a worthwhile endeavor depending on what you want. People only stick around so long as it is beneficial to them. If you can no longer offer what they want--they move on. It's not magical.

Either change what you're offering or find someone new that wants what you are offering. No sense in getting depressed over it.



Ehh I avoid those types of people.

If I make a friend I get close to I always stay with them as there friend even when it's not beneficial to me.

I hardly let many people in because most people just leave and as more and more do I close myself up even more.

I will have aquaintences who I talk to but I have under 8 friends who want to stay friends for life if possible.

If one of them leaves and stops being my friend I will end up hating them but I guess that's how life goes.

I make friends so I can have people who will stick by me till I die other then that I don't see a reason to let anyone in more then a friend (best friend ) unless I'm certain they won't leave for a long time.

That's just how I am XD maybe in the end for someone like me being alone is the healthiest thing to do because when friends go my love for them turns to hatred and anger

Maybe that's why I prefer machines to people haha people who come and go are awful friends in my opinion which is probably why I prefer my pets and machines.

Because I know they will be with me till they die or stop functioning

That's just my view on friendship though I'm pretty sure I'm in the minority with that but that's why I like to only make best friends who want to stay friends for life.

It's not that hard even if you stop talking for a year or two because things get hectic you are still best friends or friends.

Eh my view and feelings on friendship will probably just end up with me being friendless and bitter \o/ but that's how the game of life goes I guess.
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Posted 6/6/16 , edited 6/6/16
I think one thing to remember is that being "boring" isn't an objective statement. I ride horses and do artwork, and that may not be interesting to one person. Also, I'm not a gamer, so I don't really relate too much to the topic. But that's ok, because everyone has their own interests! I mean no, it doesn't feel good when someone drops a conversation one or two responses in just because you don't share the same hobby/interest that they do. Though, I just remember that they probably didn't do it with the intention of being rude (I still think it's more polite to at least try to see if you can connect in other ways).

Maybe it could be that some just forget to respond, or they think they did when they didn't (I tend to do this quite a bit ) and it has nothing to do with you at all. Also, I find that some are more comfortable being socially flexible than others. There are those who are more comfortable with what they know and have no interest in or curiosity for anything different. I have friends who are genuinely interested, but they stick to shorter responses, while others are good with exchanging paragraphs of dialogue. If you feel like you are a "boring person", you could try out a new hobby or check out a new show/fandom to see if it's something that interests you. ^^

I've dropped conversations that I didn't feel were going anywhere, and I've had people drop conversations with me for presumably the same reason, because we were too different to connect. I think people feel it's more polite to do that than to tell the person things aren't working out and they wish to stop talking. I think with digital communication comes the need for instant gratification, so sometimes chatting with someone can mimic "speed-dating". If you don't click within the first conversation, then it's onto the next one. I'm not saying this is right, just that it's often the way things are online and sometimes offline. It's a bit shallow and I know I've been guilty of it myself. The good news is that there seems to be a wide range of people here with all sorts of backgrounds and hobbies, so I hope you meet some people you can connect better with.



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Posted 6/6/16 , edited 6/6/16

Ryulightorb wrote:

Ehh I avoid those types of people.

If I make a friend I get close to I always stay with them as there friend even when it's not beneficial to me.

I hardly let many people in because most people just leave and as more and more do I close myself up even more.

I will have aquaintences who I talk to but I have under 8 friends who want to stay friends for life if possible.

If one of them leaves and stops being my friend I will end up hating them but I guess that's how life goes.

I make friends so I can have people who will stick by me till I die other then that I don't see a reason to let anyone in more then a friend (best friend ) unless I'm certain they won't leave for a long time.

That's just how I am XD maybe in the end for someone like me being alone is the healthiest thing to do because when friends go my love for them turns to hatred and anger

Maybe that's why I prefer machines to people haha people who come and go are awful friends in my opinion which is probably why I prefer my pets and machines.

Because I know they will be with me till they die or stop functioning

That's just my view on friendship though I'm pretty sure I'm in the minority with that but that's why I like to only make best friends who want to stay friends for life.

It's not that hard even if you stop talking for a year or two because things get hectic you are still best friends or friends.

Eh my view and feelings on friendship will probably just end up with me being friendless and bitter \o/ but that's how the game of life goes I guess.

Is that really true though? Quite clearly you do consider people friends while it remains beneficial to you. You expect some degree of discussion, attention, concern, reliability, and comfort...no? I mean clearly you want loyalty from them. If you legitimately got nothing out of it then you would accept being treated like trash.

People aren't going to stick around until they die because of some 'magical effect'. People stick around because they get something out of you. If you stop offering something they want (either what you're offering changed or their demands changed) then they pick up and leave. It's important to demand something out of having a relationship with someone. It's just as important people should pick up and leave when they get little benefit from you.

Otherwise you're asking people to put up with any bullshit on your end no matter what and still demand they stay.

Some people demand too much. Others offer too little. It's your call whether to change what you offer or simply seek people that accept what you currently offer.



I don't see a reason to become 'entertaining'. I am content with what I have to offer and with the people that accept it for as long as they shall. If you are not content with that route similar, then perhaps you really should consider putting more on the table.
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